after hard working on internet and do anything with my laptop!! I found it!
on windows 7 I can not debug my windows phone programs I SHOULD use Phone , and about problem for using phone :
at first I repaired my visual studio and windowsphone SDK .
then I install some file of windows phone SDK manually :
packages -> MobileTools -> ProfilerMsis -> MobileTools_ProfilerARM.msi & MobileTools_ProfilerX86.msi
packages -> MobileTools -> WPImages -> MobileTools_WPImages_enu.msi
packages -> MobileTools -> wpsdkcore -> wpsdk_en.msi
and now EVERYTHING works