I would like to apologise in advance for the performance that England will produce today and for the remainder of the World Cup.
When watching the dire performance I know they are going to serve up please bear this in mind.
The majority of the team left these shores back in November last year, and excelled themselves by beating Austrailia in their own back yard three times, each time by more than an innings. Mission accomplished the majority had to stay behind and endure a prolonged pointless 7-match ODI series in which we got hammered 6-1.
On returning to England, the players had only four days to catch up with their family before flying out too India, to prepare for the World Cup.
So again when watching England please bear in mind a lot of the team have only spent 4 days at home since November, they bare exhausted and feel like they have acheived their main goal (retaining the Ashes), so please dont laugh when Holland outplay us today.
Tired and Homesick or not, surely they can still beat the Netherlands. Have some confidence. KP will score a century (I hope - otherwise my team will look pretty sick) Stuart Broad will get a fifer, and Matt Prior will take 4 catches and 3 stumpings.