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Senior Developer and project manager chatting about something or other at desk near me.
Dev: "We have this entity called Bates, but it is the only one".
Me: "In that case it must be the Master Bates.
Pause, shaking of head, carry on.
Every man can tell how many goats or sheep he possesses, but not how many friends.
Shed Petition[ ^]
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I find the work place the hardest place to pull off a joke. Most I attempt go down like a lead balloon. I made a wise-crack once about not being able to vote because they put most polling stations in schools and I couldn't go within 200-yards of one as part of my bail conditions. From the questions the bloke asked me for the next two weeks you could tell he thought I was a genuine paedophile.
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Well, your name probably did not help.
~RaGE();
I think words like 'destiny' are a way of trying to find order where none exists. - Christian Graus
Do not feed the troll ! - Common proverb
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'Ow's about that, then?
I wanna be a eunuchs developer! Pass me a bread knife!
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Now then, now then, now then.
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As opposed to a faux, dilletente paedophile?
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I will never again mention that I was the poster of the One Millionth Lounge Post, nor that it was complete drivel. Dalek Dave
CCC Link[ ^]
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 You've gone noticeably French lately. Sat on a garlic?
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More like drunk a bottle of Pernod.
Panic, Chaos, Destruction. My work here is done.
Drink. Get drunk. Fall over - P O'H
OK, I will win to day or my name isn't Ethel Crudacre! - DD Ethel Crudacre
I cannot live by bread alone. Bacon and ketchup are needed as well. - Trollslayer
Have a bit more patience with newbies. Of course some of them act dumb - they're often *students*, for heaven's sake - Terry Pratchett
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As a comedian that has to make stuff up real quick, I find myself saying incredibly weird stuff at work - a lot of it bombs, even pretty good stuff.
Today I almost said on my arrival, "What's with all the burkas today?" (It is 0 degrees outside, and most women are covered head to toe except their eyes while outside.) I managed to realize it wasn't appropriate before it spewed out of my mouth.
That's what the holiday party is for; everyone that drinks loses their 7 second delay and the grounds are finally equal.
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