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Nagy Vilmos wrote: in a small Norman church
You own a Church?
Nagy Vilmos wrote: My old teacher will be on his organ
Has he not been warned about that?
Nagy Vilmos wrote: the whole congregation will sing out of tune
Sing with gusto and no concept of rhythm and you will get an audition for X Factor.
Also, I refer the honourable member to Rule 47a(ii) - It is never too early for a drink
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I will never again mention that I was the poster of the One Millionth Lounge Post, nor that it was complete drivel. Dalek Dave
CCC Link[ ^]
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Bottle of Gordons finest in the pocket - check
Extra long bendy straw - check
I'm going in, if I'm not back by noon send gin.
Panic, Chaos, Destruction. My work here is done.
Drink. Get drunk. Fall over - P O'H
OK, I will win to day or my name isn't Ethel Crudacre! - DD Ethel Crudacre
I cannot live by bread alone. Bacon and ketchup are needed as well. - Trollslayer
Have a bit more patience with newbies. Of course some of them act dumb - they're often *students*, for heaven's sake - Terry Pratchett
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just the one bottle of Gin? No backup?
Lobster Thermidor aux crevettes with a Mornay sauce, served in a Provençale manner with shallots and aubergines, garnished with truffle pate, brandy and a fried egg on top and Spam - Monty Python Spam Sketch
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its the 4 gallon bottle
You cant outrun the world, but there is no harm in getting a head start
Real stupidity beats artificial intelligence every time.
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Think you really want poteen. A gallon would probably kill you.
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My advice ... get tipsy and sing as load as possible. It'll cheer everyone up! 
"State acheived after eating too many chocolate-covered coconut bars - bountiful"
Chris C-B
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There's always Gin o'clock somewhere!
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To convert 9AM from early to late one simply need not go to bed.
In this simple way 9AM becomes very late and it's never too late for a drink.
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Liam Neeson has trained Batman, Obi Wan and Darth Vader. He is both Aslan and Zeus...and he punches wolves. Why would you kidnap his family?
Ger
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Twice as well. He must be a worse dad than Gerry McCann.
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*Cough ahem* Pedant alert. He didn't train Darth Vader (or Anakin). He recommended that he be trained to the Jedi Council. He was killed before any training actually took place - he only returned to the Jedi fold after Anakin turned to Vader to instruct Yoda and Obi Wan how to live on after death.
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They kidnapped his dog... 
Now please don't ask why? He has 'skills' he wants to use at something...
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"He's from Northern Ireland, Liam Neeson worked as a forklift operator for Guinness, truck driver, assistant architect and an amateur boxer. He had originally sought a career as a teacher " - imdb.com
Life - Dreams = Job
TheCardinal
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"'It divided' states Goose before close of play."(4-7)
OK, I was confident of victory yesterday and was thwarted, but not today I think!
Even Kiwi Tom will struggle with this, Griffy will be ponderous and neither Ab nor Richard will get it I think.
(There's confidence for you! I suspect it will now be solved in about 10 mins).
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I will never again mention that I was the poster of the One Millionth Lounge Post, nor that it was complete drivel. Dalek Dave
CCC Link[ ^]
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Iron-curtain?
It divided states and a curtain comes down at the end of a play. Not sure about the Goose bit though?
Andy B
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Well done. I had the Curtain bit too, can't believe I didn't get the Iron from that.
Iron - Goose.[^]
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I think it's the solution.
Googling Goose and iron:
Goose or tailor's goose was another iron name, and this came from the goose-neck curve in some handles. In Scotland people spoke of gusing (goosing) irons.
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Well Done Andy.
Almost two hours I lasted, not bad!
I had hoped to win, but you lot are getting better.
As you see above, a Goose is an Iron.
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I will never again mention that I was the poster of the One Millionth Lounge Post, nor that it was complete drivel. Dalek Dave
CCC Link[ ^]
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I spent a good while trying to figure out how states and Goose = fire, for Fire-curtain  .
Andy B
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I don't know how you got the solution but you deserve many a 5.
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When you think long and hard about it, everything can be a euphemism.
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I will never again mention that I was the poster of the One Millionth Lounge Post, nor that it was complete drivel. Dalek Dave
CCC Link[ ^]
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A man walks past a beggar every day and gives him $10 and that Continues for a year. Then suddenly the daily donation changes to $7.50.
" Well," the beggar thinks, " it's still better than nothing."
A year passes in this way until the man's daily donation suddenly becomes $5.
" What's going on now?" the beggar asks his donor. " First you give me $10 every day, then $ 7.50 and now only $5. What's the problem?"
" Well," the man says, " last year my eldest son went to university. It's very expensive, so I had to cut costs. This year my eldest daughter also went to university, so I had to cut my expenses even further ."
" And how many children do you have?" the beggar asks.
" Four," the man replies.
" Well," says the beggar, " I hope you don't plan to educate them all at my expense"
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I'm currently translating some technical document from English to Japanese.
The English version was written by a Japanese engineer some years ago, probably based on a Japanese equivalent.
The original Japanese document is long lost, so I am now taking a mostly-well-written-but-sprinkled-with-Engrish-moments document and turning it back into Japanese.
If I find my manager rolling on the floor in fits of laughter next week, I'll know why... 
Hey, I'm not trying to be funny, but given the situation, I can so see this going very very wrong!
Almost, but not quite, entirely unlike... me...
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Rots of ruck!
Peter
Software rusts. Simon Stephenson, ca 1994. So does this signature. me, 2012
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