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Joke...in the heat...memberhoernchenmeister19 Nov '12 - 0:59 
A little girl asked her Mom, "Mom, may I take the dog for a walk around the block?"
 
Mom replies, "No, because she is in heat."
 
"What's that mean?" asked the child.
 
"Go ask your father", answered the mother, "I think he's in the garage."

The little girl goes to the garage and says, "Dad, may I take Belle for a walk around the block? I asked Mom, but she said the dog was in heat, and to come
to you."
 
Dad said, "Bring Belle over here." He took a rag, soaked it with gasoline, and scrubbed the dog's backside with it and said, "Okay, you can go now, but keep Belle on the leash and only go one time around the block."

The little girl left, and returned a few minutes later with no dog on the leash. Surprised, Dad asked, "Where's Belle?"

The little girl said, "She ran out of gas about halfway down the block, so another dog is pushing her home."
JokeMake your bets...memberJoan Murt19 Nov '12 - 0:24 
Two guys where walking down the street when they saw two dogs humping.
 
One said, "I wonder how much liquor it would take to get my wife to do it that way".
 
So they made a bet of 10 bucks on whose wife would do it on the lease amount of liqour.
 
After a week they met in a bar.
 
"Well", said the first guy "How much liquor did it take".
 
"A pint of whiskey", replied the other guy.
 
The first guy said "You win, It took me a whole bottle just to get her out in the yard."
[www.tamautomation.com] Robots, CNC and PLC machines for grinding and polishing.

JokeWhy did the chicken cross the basketball court?mvpEspen Harlinn18 Nov '12 - 12:30 
He heard the ref was blowing fowls.
Espen Harlinn
Principal Architect, Software - Goodtech Projects & Services AS

Projects promoting programming in "natural language" are intrinsically doomed to fail. Edsger W.Dijkstra

GeneralRe: Why did the chicken cross the basketball court?memberJohnny J.19 Nov '12 - 1:07 
Shouldn't it be the rooster then?
Why can't I be applicable like John? - Me, April 2011
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Beidh ceol, caint agus craic againn - Seán Bán Breathnach
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Da mihi sis crustum Etruscum cum omnibus in eo!
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Just because a thing is new don’t mean that it’s better - Will Rogers, September 4, 1932

GeneralGetting philosophical...memberJohnny J.19 Nov '12 - 1:09 
Speaking of which[^]
Why can't I be applicable like John? - Me, April 2011
-----
Beidh ceol, caint agus craic againn - Seán Bán Breathnach
-----
Da mihi sis crustum Etruscum cum omnibus in eo!
-----
Just because a thing is new don’t mean that it’s better - Will Rogers, September 4, 1932

GeneralRe: Getting philosophical...mvpEspen Harlinn19 Nov '12 - 1:11 
Not bad Laugh | :laugh:
Espen Harlinn
Principal Architect, Software - Goodtech Projects & Services AS

Projects promoting programming in "natural language" are intrinsically doomed to fail. Edsger W.Dijkstra

JokeSome things you just can't explainmemberVivic17 Nov '12 - 22:17 
A farmer was sitting in the neighborhood bar getting drunk. A man came in and asked the farmer, "Hey, why are you sitting here on this beautiful day, getting drunk?"
 
The farmer shook his head and replied, "Some things you just can't explain."
 
"So what happened that's so horrible?" the man asked as he sat down next to the farmer.
 
"Well," the farmer said, "Today I was sitting by my cow, milking her. Just as I got the bucket full, she lifted her left leg and kicked over the bucket."
 
"Okay," said the man, "but that's not so bad."
 
"Some things you just can't explain," the farmer replied.
 
"So what happened then?" the man asked. The farmer said, "I took her left leg and tied it to the post on the left."
 
"And then?" the man asked.
 
"Well, I sat back down and continued to milk her. Just as I got the bucket full, she took her right leg and kicked over the bucket."
 
The man laughed and said, "Again?"
 
The farmer replied, "Some things you just can't explain."
 
"So, what did you do then?" the man asked.
 
"I took her right leg this time and tied it to the post on the right."
 
"And then?"
 
"Well, I sat back down and began milking her again. Just as I got the bucket full, the stupid cow knocked over the bucket with her tail."
 
"Hmmm," the man said and nodded his head.
 
"Some things you just can't explain," the farmer said.
 
"So, what did you do?" the man asked.
 
"Well," the farmer said, "I didn't have anymore rope, so I took off my belt and tied her tail to the rafter. In that moment, my pants fell down and my wife walked in.. Some things you just can't explain..!!"
GeneralRe: Some things you just can't explainmvpEspen Harlinn18 Nov '12 - 12:02 
Laugh | :laugh: Good one ...
Espen Harlinn
Principal Architect, Software - Goodtech Projects & Services AS

Projects promoting programming in "natural language" are intrinsically doomed to fail. Edsger W.Dijkstra

GeneralI wonder if...member d@nish 17 Nov '12 - 21:01 
golfers are excited about sex. Aren't they looking for 9/18 holes and not 1, 2 or 3?
"Bastards encourage idiots to use Oracle Forms, Web Forms, Access and a number of other dinky web publishing tolls.", Mycroft Holmes[^]

AnswerRe: I wonder if...memberihoecken20 Nov '12 - 2:26 
d@nish wrote:
If wonder if golfers are excited about sex

What a ridicules question. You can either have sex or golf. Not both. Roll eyes | :rolleyes:
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Author of Primary ROleplaying SysTem
 
How do I take my coffee? Black as midnight on a moonless night.
War doesn't determine who's right. War determines who's left.

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