VB6 SQL and Datagrid

I am having a table fields FirstName, Spouse Name, DateOfBirth, SpouseDateOfBirth and anniversary date. I want to create a form having two grid and two spinners buttons. From spinner buttons I want to select days I mean 1 to 3 days. When I change the value of buttons both grids one for birthdays and second for anniversary had to be updated. If in any case spouse name is not entered I want to pick firstname with addition of '*'. Spouse A is first name B is his spouse, spouse name not mentioned but on selected date there is not birthday of A but due to un presence of spouse name grid had to be show A** like this. If possible plz guide me to insert the grid data into table so that I can create reports.
 
Thanks a lot in advance. Hoping for an earlier favour.