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I understand lactose intolerance (actually the norm for adult mammals). What I don't understand is you particularly signaling out cow's milk. Lactose is a component of all milk.
Checking in Wikipedia (milk) I noted that the four primary types of milk (commercially available throughout the world) are roughly equal in lactose content. (Aside: Human milk is on the notably higher, although lower in fat and thus not that great in coffee . . .)
It might actually be related to what the feed cows (if it is cows-milk specific). Antibiotics,for example, and who knows what else.
I have a relative who's sensitive to casein - still a component of all milk. And a sprinkling of lactose intolerance.
You'd be correct on another (possible) basis: In general, yogurts and cheeses no longer have (significant, if any) lactose content - it's consumed by the bacteria used in the process. It's rather common for lactose-intolerant people to be able to eat these items with no ill effects.
"goat’s milk contains slightly lower levels of lactose (4.1 percent versus 4.7 percent in cow’s milk) "This jives with one of the tables I viewed before my original post. Goats milk differs in other ways - and is "better tolerated" by many with various milk sensitivities.
I don't deny your ill effects - I have a child with lactose intolerance and a grandchild with casein intolerance. Both components of all milk. The former, however, can eat many dairy products as the processing (bacteria) consume virtually all of the lactose. Tables of lactose content for various diary products are all over the internet.[^]
I bring this up only in the hope you can safely expand your food range by zeroing in on the problem. In particular, most commercial (cow's) milk products contain all sorts of nasties, such as antibiotics - to which you may be sensitive.
You have the restaurant version, with the big cheese that sometimes gets melted using a candle, very nice, or the home version, with an electrical device that heats small mini-pans in which people around the table put small cheese slices.
If you happen to visit Switzerland or the Savoie region in France (or in Alsace, then you are kindly invited at my place), you gotta give a try. There is very few lactose in raclette cheese, so it might still work for you.
Looks delicious! One of these days (years), as my wife wants to visit Europe, we'll head over "the pond." In the meantime, I noticed google came up with several places right here in NY, so there's an option.