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Other people's children are great. You can wind them up and then leave. 
Real programmers use butterflies
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I used to think the same, but then I had kids. Karma is a real b****.
But hang on, my kids are now adults. No chance of payback, Thanks for the reminder
// TODO: Insert something here Top ten reasons why I'm lazy
1.
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yacCarsten wrote: But hang on, my kids are now adults. No chance of payback,
Yet... BWAHAHAHAHAHA
As grandpa you will have plenty of them... 
M.D.V. 
If something has a solution... Why do we have to worry about?. If it has no solution... For what reason do we have to worry about?
Help me to understand what I'm saying, and I'll explain it better to you
Rating helpful answers is nice, but saying thanks can be even nicer.
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Ah, yes. Here's one of the perks I like about the Grandparent gig:
To this day, children seem to be born with a defect, by which I mean they seem to leak. It take years to finally fix the problem.
As a grandparent, when they begin to leak and otherwise ooze unpleasntries, you simply hold them up towards their parents (thus removing them from your lap or shoulder, as well) and say 'here - this is yours and it needs to be serviced.'
Observation: grandma's sometimes insist upon undertaking the work, themselves . . . ? ? ?
| Ravings en masse^ |
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| "The difference between genius and stupidity is that genius has its limits." - Albert Einstein | | "If you are searching for perfection in others, then you seek disappointment. If you seek perfection in yourself, then you will find failure." - Balboos HaGadol Mar 2010 |
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I actually did that on my mom's birthday once.
I got two much younger cousins all worked up by doing stupid sh*t, such as turning their chair or tapping their heads.
Needless to say, they tried to get back at me, but the moment they did that their mother got mad at them for bothering the adults
When they sat quietly in their chair again I started pissing them off again and things repeated.
I can't imagine their mom didn't see me doing that stuff, but she couldn't really tell me what I could or could not do.
Ultimately, I invited them to my room where they could blow off some steam
Anyway, have fun at your sister's!
I'm pretty sure you're their weirdest most fun "auntcle"! 
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I might be, but my family is brimming with weird. Apparently it's hereditary. 
Edit: My sister and I are very much alike. I call her my portable external id. She might be as weird as me.
Real programmers use butterflies
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I always enjoyed more overt forms of winding kids up.
My greatest triumph was deciding that since my aunt and uncle already had to clean footprints off the walls where their kids were climbing them (splayed out in an X going up hallways) that I should help them walk on the ceiling as well. Much fun was had by all until they got too heavy for me to safely lift over my head.
Did you ever see history portrayed as an old man with a wise brow and pulseless heart, weighing all things in the balance of reason?
Is not rather the genius of history like an eternal, imploring maiden, full of fire, with a burning heart and flaming soul, humanly warm and humanly beautiful?
--Zachris Topelius
Training a telescope on one’s own belly button will only reveal lint. You like that? You go right on staring at it. I prefer looking at galaxies.
-- Sarah Hoyt
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My half-brother brought his idiot kid around to visit my mother and I. During this brief visit, the kid went into my hobby room and trashed several delicate WWII model dioramas that I had been working on for months and months. When asked about his son's destructive behaviour, he just said, "He's only a kid, you can't blame him". I did blame both him and my brother - so when it came to Xmas time I bought the kid a plastic trumpet and a tin drum. He loved them - my brother not so much - Karma!
- I would love to change the world, but they won’t give me the source code.
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No, those sort of toys get quickly "broken" or the battery runs out and never replaced.
If you want to drive the parents nuts, get something that has a thousand pieces. These pieces find themselves strewn about the house, being stepped on, or having to search for missing pieces for hours.
// TODO: Insert something here Top ten reasons why I'm lazy
1.
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that's why he got the trumpet and the drumm... those don't need batteries 
M.D.V. 
If something has a solution... Why do we have to worry about?. If it has no solution... For what reason do we have to worry about?
Help me to understand what I'm saying, and I'll explain it better to you
Rating helpful answers is nice, but saying thanks can be even nicer.
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yacCarsten wrote: If you want to drive the parents nuts, get something that has a thousand pieces. These pieces find themselves strewn about the house, being stepped on, or having to search for missing pieces for hours.
Lego called, they want their meme back...
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Alternatively, buy Kinetic Sand! Keeping a sandy mess contained outside in a sandbox is in the past!
No matter how big the containment tote is, it's going to end up in the floor, in your socks, under the sofa, behind the dresser, etc (you know, all the fun places.)
It doesn't matter how often I sweep, run Roomba, and throw it away, more makes it's way into the home. 
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The glitter air shooter is what you were looking for.
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� Forogar � wrote: "He's only a kid, you can't blame him".
...so yeah, as his parent, your brother's the one to blame for his kid's behavior. That wasn't divine intervention, so blame has to go somewhere. Good to see he was willing to own up. Right? Right??
I have zero tolerance for misbehaving kids. And I always look at the parents. My sister's right into the "he's just a kid" camp, but in her mind that's where things stop and nothing can be done about that...
Her kid's getting older, and I'm having the last laugh.
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Grandchildren are the reward for raising your children right.
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Thats why grandparenting is great;
Wind them up on a sugar buzz with their new drum set that you got them for Xmas and send them home. 
I'm not sure how many cookies it makes to be happy, but so far it's not 27.
JaxCoder.com
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Reminds me of a sign in the waiting room of my vet's office:
"Unattended children will be given a double espresso, a Great Dane puppy, and sent home."
Software Zen: delete this;
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As I say to everyone who has that attitude. If only your parents had felt the same way!
If you can't laugh at yourself - ask me and I will do it for you.
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I guess Google folks get bored in the lockdown, too...
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🎄 Tree up, ✨ decorations up, 🎇 wreath on door.
Not too much help from the cat this time, but it still takes far too long ... at least I remember to wind lights and bead strings up when I take 'em down or it's just a scissors job and buy the damn things again!
And now... three weeks of baubles under foot as the cat plays with them, tinsel getting into everything, and far too much food and sweeties!
Christmas has officially reached us.
And I'm feeling about as festive as a dead rat. 
How about you? Are you in the "Christmas mood" yet? 🎅
"I have no idea what I did, but I'm taking full credit for it." - ThisOldTony
"Common sense is so rare these days, it should be classified as a super power" - Random T-shirt
AntiTwitter: @DalekDave is now a follower!
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Our tree went up at the beginning of December. The decorations have steadily migrated to the top front quadrant of the tree to try to keep them away from one of the cats.
It hasn't worked[^].
My Christmas YouTube playlist is on full-blast today, since it's my last working day until 5th January. 🎅🎄🍻
"These people looked deep within my soul and assigned me a number based on the order in which I joined."
- Homer
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Fortunately, mine was out while I put it up - normally he hides inside it and attacks me when I try to attach baubles ...
Some people do take extreme measures to protect the tree: Genius People Who Found a Way To Protect Their Christmas Trees From Pets[^]
"I have no idea what I did, but I'm taking full credit for it." - ThisOldTony
"Common sense is so rare these days, it should be classified as a super power" - Random T-shirt
AntiTwitter: @DalekDave is now a follower!
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lol, we use to have a playpen around the xmas tree to protect it from the kids, not the pets.
// TODO: Insert something here Top ten reasons why I'm lazy
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I celebrate it solely for the nephew. Otherwise it's just therapy for retail chains.
Real programmers use butterflies
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