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When I was a very young lad, I could not understand what was attractive about a woman's ass. After the onset of puberty, I still didn't know . . . . but the endorphins flowed nonetheless.
Evolution has built this stuff in for the purpose of breeding. Forget about what's fashionable. A male would look for 'substantial' breasts as it implies food for the newborns; hips, etc., because it implies a higher probability of successful birth for both mother and child. Legs - one of the signals, as they reform from 'little girl' to 'woman' about being of breeding age. Although manifested consciously, it is really much deeper. Part of our animal nature that can and should be embraced.
Not knowing quite what's attractive in males, I would hypothesize that an important factor would be perceived strength to supply adequate food while the woman is tending the newborns; possibly protection.
Part of the beauty in all of this is that the actual manifestation of these characteristics and what one finds attractive varies throughout our species - survival at its best.
All of these enhanced by the delightful blessing of having a companion and partner.
In case I gave a bad impression, I was trying to put forth that it's not really 'free choice'.
Perverted, perhaps, by modern (and ever changing) "morals", "beauty", and the ever-famous "look what I can see!". Our breeding instincts have been maligned, and as a consequence, targets of perversion. Consider that only humans feel the need to hide while mating, creating the later 'perversion' of exhibitionism.
Evolution has built this stuff in for the purpose of breeding. Forget about what's fashionable. A male would look for 'substantial' breasts as it implies food for the newborns
Not me. I prefer women with the ability to walk upright, as it implies at least some intelligence.
W∴ Balboos wrote:
Not knowing quite what's attractive in males, I would hypothesize...
That's simple. It's the thickness of your wallet and your social status. Appearance and even your body odor are secondary two these two perfumes. Lose them and you are instantly as attractive as a monkey, appearance again totally irrelevant.
I have lived with several Zen masters - all of them were cats.
His last invention was an evil Lasagna. It didn't kill anyone, and it actually tasted pretty good.
The cruelty of denying someone a life-partner; condemning them to loneliness; is unthinkable.
That being said, I am disregarding social pressures and politics. We, like all other creatures that require male+female to reproduce, have evolved the overwhelming need to reproduce effectively. this as an imperative (viz-a-viz, extinction). Thus, it makes sense in evolutionary terms to be attracted to characteristics that optimize breeding success. Whether one casts this as 'so straight', 'mainstream', or whatever is irrelevant: nature doesn't really give a damn. If I recall correctly, the part of the brain wherein lies one's libido is only less carefully protected, by location, then that part which tell your lungs to breathe and heart to beat. Accept your animal self and be liberated from sociopolitical tyranny. Howl at the full moon and be free.
Here's further grist for your mill: attraction for an 'exotic' other is quite common. Genetic advantages to this are obvious (dilute those nasty recessive genes!).
They're fine when covered with clothing and supported by metal wiring harnesses, but seeing a beautiful lady laying down with one boob under her armpit and the other over her shoulder is not something that pushes my buttons.
Obligatory song (youtube)[^]
I wanna be a eunuchs developer! Pass me a bread knife!
real problem is if you do something all day as a job, it's often the last thing you want to do when you get home.
same concept as many auto mechanics that drive the crappiest cars, known house builders that live in houses way beyond renovatible, chefs that wouldn't boil an egg at home....
but not always the case,
there are some whose hobby is/seems 'close' to their job, another mechanic I knew was big time into drag racing (his daily drive was a heap of crap but he had a shed full of real nice racers), builders that purposely buy run down properties to do up and flip...
... but asking them about it find out the real plan is nearly always to make enough on the hobby to ditch the job.
likewise contracting is another way out:
- if the job sounds like crap don't take it - no need to re-train (aka hit the web and self-train) for something you have zero interest in).
- contract says do X, so when signed X is all you have to do. no much less worries the "boss" will come down and shift you [temporary or even worse permanently] from X [something you don't mind] onto some other crap Y which you really have zero interest in doing (and if they insist on Y with contract you have much stronger option to tell them to get stuffed and negotiate a settlement rather then quit with empty pockets.)
if you do what you love for long enough, you'll no longer love what you do.
That's the risk with making a career out of a hobby.
I was okay with maybe the first two decades of working in the field. Then it's started to look more and more like "a job". Eventually I lost interest in working on my own little pet projects during evenings and weekends - it used to be that I could hardly wait until I was done with my workday to immediately get back into my own code, and my weekends were pretty much all dedicated to it. Now it can take me 6 months of trying to convince myself to fix even the smallest bugs.
But then, it's not necessarily that I don't like it anymore - rather, after my workday, I just feel exhausted and don't have the energy anymore to dive into anything new.
I can relate to that, and also I think I was able to treat my code more like an artist would and less like a functionary would when I wasn't doing it for money.
I engaged a whole different part of my brain i only got to employ occasionally at work.
But that also made coding a deeply personal, even emotional experience for me, and it's hard to just "give it away" to someone else. Money hardly seems adequate compensation for delivering pieces of myself for someone to package and sell.
But maybe I'm just overly attached.
When I was growin' up, I was the smartest kid I knew. Maybe that was just because I didn't know that many kids. All I know is now I feel the opposite.