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You just wait until you run out of newspapers and have to use sandpaper...
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Wait until you run out of sandpaper and have to use Izal[^]... 
"These people looked deep within my soul and assigned me a number based on the order in which I joined."
- Homer
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I had to look that stuff up.
Some of the old-time ads for it are downright hilarious.
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I thought I'd try one of these "toilet brushes" instead.
I don't recommend it, they're very messy and quite painful.
"I have no idea what I did, but I'm taking full credit for it." - ThisOldTony
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I can imagine![^] 
Anything that is unrelated to elephants is irrelephant
Anonymous
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The problem with quotes on the internet is that you can never tell if they're genuine
Winston Churchill, 1944
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Never argue with a fool. Onlookers may not be able to tell the difference.
Mark Twain
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Stout clubs put loner off(9)
"I have no idea what I did, but I'm taking full credit for it." - ThisOldTony
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I know the answers which fits perfectly but the solution is baffling me.
cheers,
Super
------------------------------------------
Too much of good is bad,mix some evil in it
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So try posting the answer - I can't give you the solution until someone does (or the time elapses, obviously) 
"I have no idea what I did, but I'm taking full credit for it." - ThisOldTony
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CORPULENT
put loner = orpulent (anagram)
Clubs =C ??? No idea why
stout is corpulent ( I guess)
cheers,
Super
------------------------------------------
Too much of good is bad,mix some evil in it
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And you are up tomorrow!
Stout
clubs C (In Bridge, the card suits are known as S, C, H, and D - it's often used in crosswords!)
put loner ORPULENT
off (anag)
CORPULENT
"Corpulent" and "Stout" are both synonyms for "Fat" as in "Overweight": Fat Synonyms, Fat Antonyms | Thesaurus.com[^]
"I have no idea what I did, but I'm taking full credit for it." - ThisOldTony
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OriginalGriff wrote: In Bridge,
Never played Bridge.
That's what trying to figure out how Clubs fit C.
cheers,
Super
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Too much of good is bad,mix some evil in it
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I have, once.
At an ex-girlfriend's for Christmas, and they decided we should all play Bridge. I was given a thick book and half an hour to pick up the rules, and then treated with contempt because I had no idea what the "bid signals" were or how the heck I was supposed to respond to them ... 
"I have no idea what I did, but I'm taking full credit for it." - ThisOldTony
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And there we have WHY she is an ex-girlfriend.
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Bidding is basically a state machine, so maybe the code would have helped!
It's interesting, at least from what I've been told, that when it comes to card play, the better bridge-playing programs still use Monte Carlo methods (lots of random trials) rather than trying to determine the best line of play through analysis.
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"Managers special: Buy two for thirty times the price!" 
"I have no idea what I did, but I'm taking full credit for it." - ThisOldTony
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While I understand the idea (and the joke), if you do this in real life, people would queue 5 times to get one roll.
You cannot cure stupidity.
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Rage wrote: You cannot cure stupidity.
According to Darwin, stupidity may cure itself at some point. This is a slow process, unfortunately.
"Five fruits and vegetables a day? What a joke!
Personally, after the third watermelon, I'm full."
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So much for Darwin... Millions years of evolution proved him wrong...
"The only place where Success comes before Work is in the dictionary." Vidal Sassoon, 1928 - 2012
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Kornfeld Eliyahu Peter wrote: So much for Darwin... Millions years of evolution proved him wrong...
It is a veeeeeeeeeery slow process 
M.D.V. 
If something has a solution... Why do we have to worry about?. If it has no solution... For what reason do we have to worry about?
Help me to understand what I'm saying, and I'll explain it better to you
Rating helpful answers is nice, but saying thanks can be even nicer.
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No but you can gather it up into a group and call it a congress.
I'm hiding from exercise...I'm in the fitness protection program.
JaxCoder.com
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Or a parliament, legislature, senate, diet...
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Congress is a much better term because ‘pro’ is the opposite of ‘con’.
If you can't laugh at yourself - ask me and I will do it for you.
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I thought a congress was a gathering of cons 
I wanna be a eunuchs developer! Pass me a bread knife!
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No, but it fixes those people that just does what everyone else does.
And the other ones will at least reduce their shopping speed considerably.
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