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Burrrrrrrppppp, oops sorry for that 
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Tell 'em it had gone bad, so you threw it away, but you've got another one you're willing to swap for a pack of toilet paper.
You'll have to look online for how to disguise a dead chicken to look like a different dead chicken; not my field of expertise.
I wanna be a eunuchs developer! Pass me a bread knife!
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A false moustache and some glasses should do it.
"I have no idea what I did, but I'm taking full credit for it." - ThisOldTony
AntiTwitter: @DalekDave is now a follower!
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So you've never ordered a video card from Newegg.com?
It went something to the effect:
them: "What operating system?"
us: "This is a video card. PCI-E is the architecture. OS doesn't matter.
them: "Windows XP?"
us: "OS doesn't matter."
them: "Windows Vista?"
us: "It doesn't require a third-party driver in Windows other than the one I can download from the manufacturer's site"
them: "Ah, Windows 7."
us: "No Windows 7."
them: "I send for windows 8."
us: "No Windows 8. Who uses Windows 8 anyway?"
them "I send for Windows 10."
us: "The graphics card is PCI-E and as long as you've a slot on the motherboard that'll accept that card, what ever RUNS on the OS you've installed on that computer will drive that edge connector in that slot.
them: "I send Windows 10."
us: "Yes, thank-you". Windows 10.
I think customer support was on a backline coming from somewhere in the climes of the Andes listening in because as our polite conversation ended, someone breathed hard on the reciever. And just before the line went dead, on my end, I could here the "them" being coached by them.
(Yeah, I'll order from newegg.com again ... talk about hoarding behavior. Thats's gotta be what's going on there.)
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I once had a similar experience with Dell support many years ago. We had to get one of their laptop fixed under warranty.
Them: What city do you live in.
Me: Hamilton
Them: No. That's not in our Records. What city do you live in
Me: Hamilton.
Them: No it must be Auckland or Christchurch. Which city do you live in
Me: Hamilton
Them: No it must be Auckland or Christchurch.
Me: You can put your stupid laptop up..... In live in Hamilton.
I've never touched a damn Dell ever again, and at the time I was our IT Manager responsible for all our companies IT purchasing.
A Fine is a Tax for doing something wrong
A Tax is a Fine for doing something good.
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Though nothing to lose a limb over, the package for the vc came labelled with my address AND the contact phone number used to talk to me.
Really, some privacy issues are not really issues until one has time to consider all the things that could go wrong having that dangling participle out there. The real funny thing about that was that since I wasn't home at the time of the original delivery I got a notice that I could pick the parcel up at a local hardware store.
Oh great, now THEY know the what, the where, the who, AND have my number as well ...
I guess most pickup venues change so often that the chances of a persistent phone number cropping up are equally unlikely to matter much.
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OriginalGriff wrote: but he lost his sense of smell and taste about a year ago
That's a long time to have CV-19 symptoms! 
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There once was a Florida man
who hoped toilet paper get he can
so he went to the store
and found they had more
than the needs of his whole clan!
Get me coffee and no one gets hurt!
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reminds me of the pic floating around on the internet of a man in the check-out line at a CostCo type store with whole pallet of TP. 
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Not "the check-out line at CostCo", but this'll do...
I'd say this guy is full of sh*t.
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I know, right!? I saw that pic too, a while back. Words escape me for people that act that way.
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From:
The Constipation Digest
James Colonic, Assistant Editor
333 Blockage Dr.
Log Jam, NY 55501
Dear Cp-Coder:
We are not currently accepting submissions.
However, I must mention that your excellent poem on
toilet paper stirred something deep within me. As
I ruminated on the piece, I felt an urgency to
publish it. It really moved me. Unfortunately, my
managing editor would not discharge the item to
publication. No amount of persuasion could loosen him
on this issue.
Sincerely,
James Colonic
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For some reason that reminds me of a story I heard about Beethoven. He had been sent a composition and asked to comment on it. His reply wen something like "Sir, I am in the smallest room in the house, and have your composition in front of me. Shortly, it will be behind me"
Keep Calm and Carry On
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Proposed government coronavirus tracking app falls at the first hurdle due to data breach | ZDNet[^]
Just publish the source code with personal data from ANOTHER APP!? 
"Amateurish" doesn't even begin to describe it...
"A spokesperson for the Covid19 Alert app said the information was "accidentally put online" due to the haste in which the team wanted to make the source code available for analysis."
If they have so much haste I'm sure this isn't the only "accident" that they put in the code.
Again, I'm NOT going to use any COVID-19 app ever.
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Sander Rossel wrote: Again, I'm NOT going to use any COVID-19 app ever.
You are not alone.
I wanna be a eunuchs developer! Pass me a bread knife!
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Didn't see that coming.
Said no-one ever.
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I didn't see this reply coming 
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My guess is the govt will do it seamlessly if you choose to not install the app. Truth is that the Big Data players already have all the tracking data that anyone could ever want, Covid-19 tracking app or not.
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This.
I've been called paranoid before. I'm not. Nobody has a single database that contains everything about everyone.
But start cross-referencing however and the picture being painted can present a whole different story.
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So before we all jump on the "it's never going to work it's impossible not on my watch over my dead body" bandwagon, can we step back and be software developers?
- There's a serious issue and we, as developers, can help.
- There are serious privacy considerations. We, as developers, can help.
So let's start with the lowest common denominator here ("We, as developers, can help") and workshop some ideas
I think Google / Apple have discussed this one but I haven't had a chance to read up on it. It seems to be along the following lines:
- You install an app and give it access to your bluetooth. The app generates a GUID as an ID and stores that on the device. And only on the device.
- It constantly scans it's surroundings for other IDs via bluetooth that are being transmitted by the apps on other people's phones. It records all IDs that you're next to for more than 15 mins
- When someone is diagnosed with COVID the health care worker requests their app ID. They don't ask for your name, your email, or anything. Just the ID you were broadcasting.
- A central server sends out a push notification with that ID. If someone else's app has that ID in their "person I've been near for 15 mins" list they get the big red scary screen of self isolation.
That's it. Start to end. You can delete the app. You can wipe any trace of the ID from your phone. The ID was never associated with you in any way. There is NO GPS logging.
Anyone see any holes in this?
cheers
Chris Maunder
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I often have my bluetooth off. So do many people I know. So GPS tracking seems more reliable. Still, "the app" can do the tracking on your device alone.
#SupportHeForShe
Government can give you nothing but what it takes from somebody else. A government big enough to give you everything you want is big enough to take everything you've got, including your freedom.-Ezra Taft Benson
You must accept 1 of 2 basic premises: Either we are alone in the universe or we are not alone. Either way, the implications are staggering!-Wernher von Braun
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I really don't like babies, so your subject is poorly chosen on me 
Seriously though, the idea sounds alright when done right.
And it's that last part I worry about.
We've seen it time and time again.
And here it is again, an app that's not supposed to track users leaked personal data before it even went into production.
So there's the hole, the incompetence of people.
xkcd explains it quite well[^] 
I've laid out my (mostly) non-technical arguments about such apps in this Lounge post[^].
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a) That XKCD is so awesome.
b) Yep. They can and do track us already.
The only problem is, even though we've allowed them to do it because it's convenient to us, we're not going to let the data be used to open up our lives because we don't want to admit it openly.
Deep down we all just want our cake and we want to eat it too.
cheers
Chris Maunder
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A long time ago,
in a business far, far away...
I worked for a company that made ballot-counting equipment and software during the MS-DOS and "hanging chad" era. The idea of applying blockchain to that domain is... ![Elephant | [mastadon]](https://www.codeproject.com/script/Forums/Images/elephant.gif) ing hilarious. Go ahead, kids. Daddy's going to sit back and watch the world burn.
Software Zen: delete this;
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