The Weird and The Wonderful
The Weird and The Wonderful forum is a place to post Coding Horrors,
Worst Practices, and the occasional flash of brilliance.
We all come across code that simply boggles the mind. Lazy kludges, embarrassing mistakes, horrid
workarounds and developers just not quite getting it. And then somedays we come across - or write -
the truly sublime.
Post your Best, your worst, and your most interesting. But please - no
programming questions . This forum is purely for amusement and discussions on code snippets. All
actual programming questions will be removed.
|Well it was either leave it or rewrite and debug a complex lexer by hand. The thing *worked perfectly* every single time, and was fast. It was just really, really ugly to look at.
Also, I love that you're A Bastard Programmer from Hell.
I used to read the Bastard Operator from Hell series when I was a kid. Loved it.
"The power cord?" I ask
"No worries at all" I say "Is it all working well now?"
"Yes, I think so. I'm sorry, you WERE right all along"
"Yes, we're getting a lot of this, it's due to the current Global Warming
problem. It causes random thermal expansion and contraction resulting in
temperature induced movement of friction based holding mechanisms.."
I listen carefully. Nothing. In other words, <DUMMY MODE ON>...
"You can fix it permanently tho'" I say
"Well it's all to do with lowering salt deposits on the metal contacts"
"Oh!" (Dummy mode irrevocably engaged)
"All you need to do is just take the power plug out deposit some dilute mineral
salts on it. Do you have some dilute mineral salts on you?"
"Ok, no worries, just stick it in your mouth drool into it. But make sure you
wipe the plug first to get rid of any germs, and TURN THE SWITCH OFF ON THE
MONITOR before you do - we don't want a nasty accident!
I hang up as the receiver hits the floor. Disk space is too good for them.
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