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Let me tell you a little about myself. I own a mid-sized company I inherited from my parents. Its a great place to work and makes a fortune for me, my current wife, my 7 kids, my 3 ex's and my dead-beat siblings. It became extra profitable a few years ago when I hired a freshly minted MBA to run things - he really shook up the HR department. Leaves me plenty of time to pimp out the new Bentley! Employees look a little haggard these days but honestly... who cares? 
Anyways... about the birthday. I hope nobody throws me a party. 
Government is not reason; it is not eloquent; it is force. Like fire, it is a dangerous servant and a fearful master. ~ George Washington
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If they do - sack everyone who attended. It's the only way...
Those who fail to learn history are doomed to repeat it. --- George Santayana (December 16, 1863 – September 26, 1952)
Those who fail to clear history are doomed to explain it. --- OriginalGriff (February 24, 1959 – ∞)
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Excellent idea! I'll have them all sign a guest book to find out who attends because I'll be on Bimini with the mistresses. Ta ta!
Government is not reason; it is not eloquent; it is force. Like fire, it is a dangerous servant and a fearful master. ~ George Washington
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Shouldn't that be, I'll be on the mistresses in Bimini
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So, it's the boss's ntieth birthday soon. His PR has decided we should organise a surprise party.
We're still kidding ourselves we're a "family run company" - that moment passed about a year before I joined, and I've been here a couple of years. Interestingly we're a "family company" when it comes to expectations of flexibility about our responsibilities as employees, but not a "family company" when it comes to employer flexibility, and we're accruing HR policies at a rate of knots. The upper echelons can't figure out why few so people have agreed to attend because in their heads this is still a family business, so they are trying to three-line whip it.
Two days ago an e-mail went out about a collection. Unlike other collections, it's been made pretty obvious that everyone is expected we'd donate. An e-mail was sent yesterday that the collection envelope would be arriving in our office, presumably anointed with holy chrism so we had no excuse not to have cash on us. Worse, staff members who are well known to be struggling have had to pitch in, though the amount was noticeably lower than a normal member of staff collection - I assume people aren't keen to donate to a man whose car wheels cost more than any single car in the car-park.
Today another e-mail. We're all to report to the car-park, wearing insert company name here branded clothes, so we can have a collective photo taken - so it turns out we are performing monkeys too.
Not the boss's fault any of this, and he's certainly earned his money - but the expectation is galling.
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Sue-de-Nime wrote: Two days ago an e-mail went out about a collection. Unlike other collections, it's been made pretty obvious that everyone is expected we'd donate. An e-mail was sent yesterday that the collection envelope would be arriving in our office
Take enough money to have a good lunch and pass it on. 
The report of my death was an exaggeration - Mark Twain
Simply Elegant Designs JimmyRopes Designs
I'm on-line therefore I am.
JimmyRopes
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I used to hate those collections: normally one of the lower echelon staff (invariably female) was deputed to take the envelope round and shame you into donating, even if you hated the guy.
They didn't like me much: One marketing droid (who had his head so firmly up his own colon he could inspect his own appendix) lost £5 to me, and a Sales Manager got all the buttons off my best shirt, cut off while the lady waited. 
Those who fail to learn history are doomed to repeat it. --- George Santayana (December 16, 1863 – September 26, 1952)
Those who fail to clear history are doomed to explain it. --- OriginalGriff (February 24, 1959 – ∞)
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leadership fail. Just wow, taking up a collection?
They should issue a new HR policy.
Charlie Gilley
<italic>Stuck in a dysfunctional matrix from which I must escape...
"Where liberty dwells, there is my country." B. Franklin, 1783
“They who can give up essential liberty to obtain a little temporary safety deserve neither liberty nor safety.” BF, 1759
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We used to have a collection around Christmas time for a holiday present for the boss. No one, not even the boss, really liked it. The boss would in turn buy small presents for everyone in the department. Anyway, we got rid of it all and instead collect money for a charity. Then we plan some get-together with the whole department where we do some kind of charity work, like making blankets for the children's hospital, or buying and wrapping gifts for the YMCA holiday gift program. That way if an employee can't really afford to donate money, they still have the opportunity to donate some time to help out a charity.
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I now have a couple of Sumsung 4S phones running Android. So I thought I might try to learn to develop apps for them.
What's the language / tool stack I need?
If it's not broken, fix it until it is
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The answer[^]
Government is not reason; it is not eloquent; it is force. Like fire, it is a dangerous servant and a fearful master. ~ George Washington
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If your actions inspire others to dream more, learn more, do more and become more, you are a leader.-John Q. Adams
You must accept one of two basic premises: Either we are alone in the universe, or we are not alone in the universe. And either way, the implications are staggering.-Wernher von Braun
Only two things are infinite, the universe and human stupidity, and I'm not sure about the former.-Albert Einstein
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Right, I would never have thought to Google it before asking here.
If it's not broken, fix it until it is
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Glad I could help! 
Government is not reason; it is not eloquent; it is force. Like fire, it is a dangerous servant and a fearful master. ~ George Washington
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Kevin Marois wrote: I would never have thought to Google it
Strangely enough that's what most of us thought.
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If you're going to post an annoying snotty response, at least quote me right
If it's not broken, fix it until it is
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He did. When you quote a book, you don't quote the entire book.
I wanna be a eunuchs developer! Pass me a bread knife!
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This is the Lounge, if it's too hot for you ...
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The post below about Apache Cordova should get you going
If your actions inspire others to dream more, learn more, do more and become more, you are a leader.-John Q. Adams
You must accept one of two basic premises: Either we are alone in the universe, or we are not alone in the universe. And either way, the implications are staggering.-Wernher von Braun
Only two things are infinite, the universe and human stupidity, and I'm not sure about the former.-Albert Einstein
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Agreed. Not seen that before and very informative.
Regards,
Rob Philpott.
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Personally I'd go for Xamarin so you can use C#/.NET. It's not free but you get full Visual Studio integration.
.-.
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modified 16-May-14 12:03pm.
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Lloyd Atkinson wrote: Xamarin so you can use C#/.NET
That compiles to Java bytecode does it?
"The whole idea that carbon dioxide is the main cause of the recent global warming is based on a guess that was proved false by empirical evidence during the 1990s." climate-models-go-cold
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I think it does yes.
.-.
|o,o|
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