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You need something to relax.[^] 
The language is JavaScript. that of Mordor, which I will not utter here
This is Javascript. If you put big wheels and a racing stripe on a golf cart, it's still a f***ing golf cart.
"I don't know, extraterrestrial?"
"You mean like from space?"
"No, from Canada."
If software development were a circus, we would all be the clowns.
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good luck mate - I have a strange nerve bifurcation it took my new dentist a while to get the hang of - these days he just injects lots of anaesthetic, everywhere - specially after I gave him the 'now, Im going to cup your ghoulies in my hand, you hurt me and I'll hurt you' line (he'd never heard that before)
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I tried that once, but she didn't see the funny side...
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Mrs Wife suffered from a plumber-turned-dentist.
She was having a post+crown done. Apparently the post was the right fit but the sc^msucker did his best to force it in. A visit or two later he was done. The result, it seems, is that he used so much force he actually cracked the side of the tooth and now a root canal was added (by a new dentist) and then the whole post/crown had to be refitted. A couple kilo-dollars sailed away with that.
Slightest silver lining - I had an appointment with the sc^msucker, too, but had to delay it and the Mrs. went well before I did or he'd have gotten to both of us.
| Ravings en masse^ |
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| "The difference between genius and stupidity is that genius has its limits." - Albert Einstein | | "If you are searching for perfection in others, then you seek disappointment. If you are seek perfection in yourself, then you will find failure." - Balboos HaGadol Mar 2010 |
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Register article: "Upstart AI dreams of 'disrupting' digital marketing – with sex" [^] Sentient Technologies: [^].
the following: published under CPOPL, Code Project Open Poetic License, first publication rights assigned to CodeProject
In a dappled-with-sunlight glen on the sprawling campus of SentienX, I was taken blind-folded ... somewhere. I heard the metallic thunk of a heavy door close behind me, and, then, the whooshing sound of what I guessed was another heavy door being opened by hydraulics of some kind.
I was in a sterile looking room, all off-white with beige contrasts, all the surfaces rounded, smooth. A man and a woman, both in lab coats, both wearing surgical face masks, approached me, each carrying a clipboard.
In the center of the room was something that looked like a cross between an aquarium and an MRI machine. I knew I was to lie down, and I knew that I would be taken into the bowels of this Leviathan.
The woman spoke: "Just relax, pay attention to your breath, and, from time to time, try to let a sense of what you want from your website, what you really want ... come to you."
I removed my shoes, lay down on the table that had been lowered automatically from the ceiling; it was comfortable, warm, I felt myself instantly becoming drowsy. I vaguely remember the table in motion, gliding so quietly into ...
My memories of what happened while I was in the belly of whatever this whale-of-the-future was are ... dream-like, fragmented. One moment I would be waist-deep in the small waves of a tropical beach, the night stars pricking a pin-cushion of a moonless night like gems.
Then, suddenly, I was on a moving train of some kind, so crowded with people that I could not move my arms.
I flew through the air in giant-thunderheads illuminated by lightning; I was on the bottom of a pitch-black sea, scuttling sideways on my many legs and arms armored in chitin, while gelatinous luminescent creatures floating above me brushed their hanging festoon of tentacles across my carapace, each touch sending sparks and patterns of electricity through me that I perceived as a kind of music totally alien, yet, somehow, comforting as a lullaby.
Then, I was back, back in that smooth-white room. I put my shoes on; I was escorted back, blind-folded, to SentienX's reception lobby; the receptionist said to me, when I signed out: "Your design should be up in about ten-days; how do you feel" ?
I tried to answer her and ... the most peculiar thing ... it was like I was watching a movie of my breath, my voice, my lips, in slow-motion. Someone, who was not quite "me," was speaking: "I feel ... wonderful."
Driving back home, I was only slightly aware of people tail-gating me, honking their horns; now, I realize I must have been driving too slowly.
The euphoria, if that's what it was, lasted for about a week: a sense of detachment, of playful indifference to the daily small business of life. I noticed, later, that for that entire week, I did not use the internet ... that, my friends told me, was ... amazing. Of course, because of the non-disclosure I had signed with SentienX in order to get in the beta, I couldn't say anything to them to explain what must have appeared as a radically changed personality.
On the tenth day, the e-mail came, with the link to my beta-site.
It was single page, black, with this text in white:
"You don't really need this."
There was no link, no pop-up, no animation, no menu.
That night I had the first clear memory of what I had wished for, inside Leviathan: the derelict ghost of the young-man-idealist-and-social-rebel-with-too-many-causes-and-not-enough-responsibility had, evidently, come out of wherever I had banished him to on the painful road to so-called "maturity."
He had wished for one thing: that every human child would have the opportunity to fulfill their divine-given potential, free of fear, free of hunger, free of illness, free of slavery and exploitation ... loved, nurtured, cherished, free to choose their heart-and-mind's path.
I never wanted five-hundred-thousand FaceBook followers !
«There is a spectrum, from "clearly desirable behaviour," to "possibly dodgy behavior that still makes some sense," to "clearly undesirable behavior." We try to make the latter into warnings or, better, errors. But stuff that is in the middle category you don’t want to restrict unless there is a clear way to work around it.» Eric Lippert, May 14, 2008
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Wonderful Bill. Absolutely wonderful.
"Rock journalism is people who can't write interviewing people who can't talk for people who can't read." Frank Zappa 1980
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Hi, I'm glad you enjoyed this ! thanks, Bill
«There is a spectrum, from "clearly desirable behaviour," to "possibly dodgy behavior that still makes some sense," to "clearly undesirable behavior." We try to make the latter into warnings or, better, errors. But stuff that is in the middle category you don’t want to restrict unless there is a clear way to work around it.» Eric Lippert, May 14, 2008
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Balancing fashion against my allowance (10)
Bad command or file name. Bad, bad command! Sit! Stay! Staaaay...
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Suspension or proportion ?
We can’t stop here, this is bat country - Hunter S Thompson RIP
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No, and ... no.
Bad command or file name. Bad, bad command! Sit! Stay! Staaaay...
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Moderation ?
We can’t stop here, this is bat country - Hunter S Thompson RIP
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Is the answer I was looking for!
Care to explain?
Bad command or file name. Bad, bad command! Sit! Stay! Staaaay...
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Fashion = Mode
Allowance = ration
Balance = Moderation
We can’t stop here, this is bat country - Hunter S Thompson RIP
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Nice. I thought the first part was mode, just didn't get the rest! 
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I was the other way around  I kept thinking trend,in,chic etc...
We can’t stop here, this is bat country - Hunter S Thompson RIP
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Spot on! 
(and I remembered to upvote your MODERATION as well  )
Bad command or file name. Bad, bad command! Sit! Stay! Staaaay...
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I'm not going to be the subject of suspension then ?
We can’t stop here, this is bat country - Hunter S Thompson RIP
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I'm not going to leave you hanging around!
Bad command or file name. Bad, bad command! Sit! Stay! Staaaay...
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And yup: Clickety[^]
Anything that is unrelated to elephants is irrelephant
Anonymous
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The problem with quotes on the internet is that you can never tell if they're genuine
Winston Churchill, 1944
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I'd just like a chance to prove that money can't make me happy.
Me, all the time
modified 13-Sep-16 4:04am.
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Belly Laugh
"Rock journalism is people who can't write interviewing people who can't talk for people who can't read." Frank Zappa 1980
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Shut up and take your upvote.
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Anything that is unrelated to elephants is irrelephant
Anonymous
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The problem with quotes on the internet is that you can never tell if they're genuine
Winston Churchill, 1944
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I'd just like a chance to prove that money can't make me happy.
Me, all the time
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Or informed him that there 103 pending Windows updates ready to install 
"There are two ways of constructing a software design: One way is to make it so simple that there are obviously no deficiencies, and the other way is to make it so complicated that there are no obvious deficiencies. The first method is far more difficult." - C.A.R. Hoare
Home | LinkedIn | Google+ | Twitter
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Movie Quote Of The Day
Quote: Even Oedipus didn't see his mother coming.
Which movie?
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