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I see Germany had A WANK on the Ski Jump yesterday
Honest[^]
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Obscurum per obscurius.
Ad astra per alas porci.
Quidquid latine dictum sit, altum videtur .
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It takes a lot of courage to go down that slope and at precisely the right time to toss yourself off.
If there is one thing more dangerous than getting between a bear and her cubs it's getting between my wife and her chocolate.
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It is a shame he didn't come first.
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Obscurum per obscurius.
Ad astra per alas porci.
Quidquid latine dictum sit, altum videtur .
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But... are you suggesting that it is not snow? 
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Women!
If there is one thing more dangerous than getting between a bear and her cubs it's getting between my wife and her chocolate.
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Women? 
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Bahha! I saw this as well and had a good chuckle.
The Mrs called me a child
"Benjamin is nobody's friend. If Benjamin were an ice cream flavor, he'd be pralines and dick." ~ Garth Algar
"If you think it's expensive to hire a professional to do the job, wait until you hire an amateur." ~ Paul Neal "Red" Adair
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Is Fanny Chmelar[^] not taking part this year? 
"These people looked deep within my soul and assigned me a number based on the order in which I joined."
- Homer
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"Catch song name and leave on mail boat within Mr Auld's range?"(10)
There you go.
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Obscurum per obscurius.
Ad astra per alas porci.
Quidquid latine dictum sit, altum videtur .
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Initially CCCs are insanely random, not generally obvious, repeatedly making short of Dave's high ground!
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Well Done Tom
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Obscurum per obscurius.
Ad astra per alas porci.
Quidquid latine dictum sit, altum videtur .
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Better than the original! 
Those who fail to learn history are doomed to repeat it. --- George Santayana (December 16, 1863 – September 26, 1952)
Those who fail to clear history are doomed to explain it. --- OriginalGriff (February 24, 1959 – ∞)
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You mean 'Easier' don't you!
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Obscurum per obscurius.
Ad astra per alas porci.
Quidquid latine dictum sit, altum videtur .
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No
I found them both pretty simple! 
Those who fail to learn history are doomed to repeat it. --- George Santayana (December 16, 1863 – September 26, 1952)
Those who fail to clear history are doomed to explain it. --- OriginalGriff (February 24, 1959 – ∞)
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You guys are a few thousand miles closer to them than I!
I'd never heard of them before tonight - I had to resort to Google after the first 7 letters 
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I thought it was a little unfair on some members who wouldn't necessarily know where "Mr Auld" lives and works. Perhaps just using "Scotsmans high ground" or similar would have been fairer - I dunno, I'm not the setter, because my mind just doesn't work that way.
Those who fail to learn history are doomed to repeat it. --- George Santayana (December 16, 1863 – September 26, 1952)
Those who fail to clear history are doomed to explain it. --- OriginalGriff (February 24, 1959 – ∞)
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I thought the Mr Auld reference was a dead give away. I was thinking of Scottish ranges immediately and I'm on the other side of the world!
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Anyone who frequents these parts knows Dave likes to go downhill fast and that he lives in the Granite City.
It was a was and lonely place yerunnerstan?
---------------------------------
Obscurum per obscurius.
Ad astra per alas porci.
Quidquid latine dictum sit, altum videtur .
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A lawyer boarded an airplane in New Orleans with a box of frozen crabs and asked a blonde flight attendant to take care of them for him.
She took the box and promised to put it in the crew's refrigerator.
He very crassly advised her that he was holding her personally responsible for them staying frozen, mentioning in a very haughty manner that he was a lawyer, and proceeded to rant at her about what would happen if she let them thaw out...
Needless to say, she was annoyed by his behavior.
Shortly before landing in New York... she used the intercom to announce to the entire cabin... "Would the lawyer who gave me the crabs in New Orleans please raise your hand?"
Needless to say, not one hand went up.
So she took them home and ate them!
Two lessons here:
1. Lawyers aren't as smart as they think they are.
2. Blondes aren't as dumb as most folks think.
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The Israelis and Arabs realized that, if they continued fighting, they would someday end up destroying the whole world. So they decided to settle their dispute with an ancient practice: a duel of two, like David and Goliath. This "duel" would be a dog fight.
The Arabs found the biggest, meanest Dobermans and Rottweilers in the world. They bred them together and then crossed their offspring with the meanest Siberian wolves.
The negotiators agreed each side would take 5 years to develop the best fighting dog they could. The dog that won the fight would earn its people the right to rule the disputed areas. The losing side would have to lay down its arms for good.
They selected only the biggest, strongest puppy of each litter, fed it the best food and killed all the other puppies. They used steroids and trainers in their quest for the perfect killing machine. After the 5 years were up, they had a dog that needed steel prison bars on its cage. Only expert trainers could handle this incredibly nasty and ferocious beast.
When the day of the big dog-fight finally arrived, the Israelis showed up with a very strange-looking animal, a Dachshund that was 10 feet long!
Everyone at the dogfight arena felt sorry for the Israelis.. No one there seriously thought this weird, odd-looking animal stood any chance against the growling beast over in the Arab camp. All the bookies took one look and predicted that the Arab dog would win in less than a minute.
As the cages were opened, the Dachshund slowly waddled toward the center of the ring.
The Arab dog leaped from its cage and charged the giant wiener-dog.
As he got to within an inch of the Israeli dog, the Dachshund opened its jaws and swallowed the Arab beast whole in one bite. There was nothing left but a small puff of fur from the Arab killer dog's tail floating to the ground.
The stunned crowd of international observers, bookies and media personnel let out a collective gasp of disbelief and surprise.
The Arabs approached the Israelis, muttering and shaking their heads in disbelief. "We do not understand," said their leader, "Our top scientists and breeders worked for 5 long years with the meanest, biggest Dobermans, Rottweilers and Siberian wolves, and they developed an incredible killing machine of a dog!"
The Israelis replied. "Well, for 5 years, we have had a team of Jewish plastic surgeons from Boca Raton working to make an alligator look like a Dachshund."
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You should maybe move it to the jokebox before the posse wakes up.
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You only have 30 minutes. 
Don't mind those people who say you're not HOT. At least you know you're COOL.
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"The negotiators"
I gave up when I got to that bit
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