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Last night I reached for my liquid Viagra and accidentally swigged from a bottle of Twink. I woke up this morning with a huge correction.
My girlfriend said she was leaving me due to my obsession with the 60's group The Monkees. I thought she was joking........ And then I saw her face......
My budgie broke his leg today so I made him a little splint out of a couple of Beehive matches his little face lit up when he tried to walk… Unfortunately, I had forgotten to remove the sandpaper from the bottom of his cage.
I got sacked last night from the Salvation Army soup kitchen, the ungrateful bastards.
All I said was, 'hurry up for Christ's sake ................ some of us have got homes to go to!'
Last night I was sitting on the sofa watching TV when I heard my wife's voice from the kitchen, 'what do you feel like for dinner my love ......... chicken, beef or lamb?' I said, ' chicken please' She replied, 'You're having soup you fat bastard, I was talking to the cat!'
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I get that that last one all the time, why did you put that in after all the jokes?
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Yeah, I know that one too.. 
Anything that is unrelated to elephants is irrelephant
Anonymous
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The problem with quotes on the internet is that you can never tell if they're genuine
Winston Churchill, 1944
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I'd just like a chance to prove that money can't make me happy.
Me, all the time
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Time for a Cat astrophe then 
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Where and when did you meet my grandfather?
The language is JavaScript. that of Mordor, which I will not utter here
This is Javascript. If you put big wheels and a racing stripe on a golf cart, it's still a f***ing golf cart.
"I don't know, extraterrestrial?"
"You mean like from space?"
"No, from Canada."
If software development were a circus, we would all be the clowns.
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I’m watching Mr. Robot. Elliot was coding in Python at one point. I taught myself Python 2 and then I see I need 3. I’ve seen some hacker code and all of it was Python. Why?
BTW don’t laugh. If you haven’t watched Mr. Robot, you probably will. It gives one a harmless tingle.
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Seriously, you are trying to find a correlation between a TV series and reality!
Why python? because the producer wanted it. Why have you seen python hacker code, because your interest is in python.
Never underestimate the power of human stupidity
RAH
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Mycroft Holmes wrote: Why python? because the producer wanted it.
Or maybe that was the only thing they came up with their initial Google search.
I am amazed the way people are using Python, and especially in the cases of hacking performance is must-have. Python has very low performance than other of the same paradigm (because it is interpreted language).
But, what happens in Hollywood, stays in Hollywood. 
The sh*t I complain about
It's like there ain't a cloud in the sky and it's raining out - Eminem
~! Firewall !~
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Afzaal Ahmad Zeeshan wrote: But, what happens in Hollywood, stays in Hollywood.
Unfortunately, it doesn't.
If you have an important point to make, don't try to be subtle or clever. Use a pile driver. Hit the point once. Then come back and hit it again. Then hit it a third time - a tremendous whack.
--Winston Churchill
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Because that is not hacking, it is just Hollywood. I'm glad we are on the same pitch as I am also watching Mr. Robot, the only difference is that I am finding the bugs.
One more thing[^] to support my claim, "this is not hacking, it is just Hollywood" is the way Elliot (the techie) uses x.x.x.373 as a valid IP address. Now, even beginners know an IP address ranges from 0-255.
Note that Python, Shell, even JavaScript can be used to perform hacking, the only thing to think about it, would it work for the hack you are attempting? The major part is: Most of the audience is not programmer. So that is why they get away with it, besides you don't expect them to blow up everything, with the help of Dark Army, do you?
The sh*t I complain about
It's like there ain't a cloud in the sky and it's raining out - Eminem
~! Firewall !~
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Afzaal Ahmad Zeeshan wrote: ...is the way Elliot (the techie) uses x.x.x.373 as a valid IP address
This is probably has the same reasoning as using 555 phone numbers (in 'mercan media), they don't want to accidentally use somebodies IP address.
Interesting though, is that according to somebody on Wikipedia (I couldn't spot the reference) only 555-0100 to 555-0199 are reserved for fictional numbers and the rest are reserved for actual use, so one day you may actually be able to call the Ghostbusters.
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urlonz wrote: BTW don’t laugh. If you haven’t watched Mr. Robot, you probably will.
Yeah - we started with Amazon Prime last Friday, and watched episode one the other day. We'll watch more (as permitted by Herself) but it doesn't require the same degree of suspension of disbelief that some TV / movie "hacking" does: Its a UNIX system! I know this! - YouTube[^] for example...
Bad command or file name. Bad, bad command! Sit! Stay! Staaaay...
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urlonz wrote: If you haven’t watched Mr. Robot, you probably will.
Tried it once, didn't like it!
I am not a number. I am a ... no, wait!
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Finally arriving home from a 14 hour drive, I found the house a little warm. For the second time this year, the coils have frozen up...both times were high humidity and the thermostat was set too low. I normally keep it at 72F, but apparently while I was away, the wife changed the setting to a few degrees cooler. I realize this is a symptom of low Freon pressure and have already scheduled my A/C guy for next week. cha-ching!
An hour after turning off the unit, the ice has fallen and the dripping is slowing. I've turned it back on now, so hopefully the coolness will return soon! 
btw, the trip was to a trade show in San Antonio, TX where it was unbearably hot and humid. (103F last Tuesday!) The city is fantastic though...the hotel was on the Riverwalk which is really nice. I'd recommend going in Spring or Autumn though!
On the way there, I made the drive in one day which was brutal. The trip home was split...no way around it as the show was over at 1PM and by the time I dropped my colleague off at the airport and got on my way it was 3PM. Nevertheless, the cooling has begun and after a few beers, it's good to be home! Oh yeah, the wife is not home, so I have the place to myself!
"Go forth into the source" - Neal Morse
modified 14-Jul-16 19:10pm.
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I hope you are safe. My thoughts are with you tonight.
This space for rent
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Tragic. 73 confirmed dead as of right now, including lots of children. 
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84 confirmed at this moment. It is hard to understand that someone can do this....
In Word you can only store 2 bytes. That is why I use Writer.
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They are terrorists: the whole idea is to do such terrible things that people will accept anything to make it stop happening. If you can't understand the motivation, that's probably a good thing - it says good things about your character.
Bad command or file name. Bad, bad command! Sit! Stay! Staaaay...
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My thoughts and prayers are with the French muslim community this morning. As a society, we (the west) must find a way to prevent whatever is driving good young men to actions like this. Whatever intolerance it is, must be rooted out by a sensible government.
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So you're asking for intolerance of intolerance? It doesn't take long to get very, very complicated, does it?
I am not a number. I am a ... no, wait!
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9082365 wrote: So you're asking for intolerance of intolerance?
No. Just intolerance of immorality.
There are only 10 types of people in the world, those who understand binary and those who don't.
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RyanDev wrote: Just intolerance of immorality.
Immorality like, say, illegally invading a country on a pretext, having misled both your own cabinet and Parliament, because you wanted to please a hawkish President? Like I said, it gets complicated very quickly. There will never be an end to this as long as neither side recognises that some of the other's causes may be just and their grievances legitimate however base and evil their actions in support of them.
I am not a number. I am a ... no, wait!
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Tolerate intolerance and you end up conquered. As in military conquered, i.e. slave.
Then we wouldn't be able to propagate tolerance ideals because we'd be flogged or killed for doing so.
NOTE: The second sentence ha been written using "we" instead of thye common "you" in order not to sound accusatory. There are probably better ways to phrase it but I'm no native speaker.
GCS d--- s-/++ a- C++++ U+++ P- L- E-- W++ N++ o+ K- w+++ O? M-- V? PS+ PE- Y+ PGP t++ 5? X R++ tv-- b+ DI+++ D++ G e++>+++ h--- ++>+++ y+++* Weapons extension: ma- k++ F+2 X
If you think 'goto' is evil, try writing an Assembly program without JMP. -- TNCaver
When I was six, there were no ones and zeroes - only zeroes. And not all of them worked. -- Ravi Bhavnani
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Live in a society that is completely intolerant of intolerance and you're a slave anyway. That's what those who live in the shadow of extreme political correctness are already saying. Free speech and dissenting opinion disappear, even become criminalised.
I hate to keep repeating the litany but it is far, far more complicated than anyone is suggesting in this thread. Correction all too readily becomes oppression. Punishment all too readily becomes vengeance; it hardly ever fits the crime. The persecuted, freed from their chains, all too readily become persecutors.
To every complex problem there is a simple solution ... and it's wrong! As long as we keep applying simple solutions the problem will get ever more complex and the consequences ever more terrible. The 'War on Terror' has done nothing but feed escalation, create martyrs, and make the refractory ever more intransigent.
I am not a number. I am a ... no, wait!
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I totally agree with your argumentation, there are no simple solutions.
9082365 wrote: Free speech and dissenting opinion disappear, even become criminalised.
And that creates frustration and hate - not the best environment for searching good solutions to anything.
GCS d--- s-/++ a- C++++ U+++ P- L- E-- W++ N++ o+ K- w+++ O? M-- V? PS+ PE- Y+ PGP t++ 5? X R++ tv-- b+ DI+++ D++ G e++>+++ h--- ++>+++ y+++* Weapons extension: ma- k++ F+2 X
If you think 'goto' is evil, try writing an Assembly program without JMP. -- TNCaver
When I was six, there were no ones and zeroes - only zeroes. And not all of them worked. -- Ravi Bhavnani
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