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Love
A teacher asks a student:
"What kind of woman would you like to be with when you're all grown up?"
"A woman like the moon!" Answers the kid.
"That's beautiful," breathes the teacher, "what a choice! Because you'd like her to be beautiful and radiant like the moon?"
"No, I'd like her to appear at night and disappear come morning!"
Death
After Bob died, everyone gathered at his funeral. Then the minister started to speak: "He was a model husband, a decent man, a terrific father.."
The widow then makes a motion for her son to come to her.
"What is it, mother?" he whispers.
"Dear, go check the casket, I think we're at the wrong funeral..."
Hope
Wife: "What are you doing?"
Husband: "Nothing."
Wife: "What do you mean nothing? You've been staring at our marriage certificate for over an hour!"
Husband: "Yea, I'm checking the expiration date."
Neighbors
"The new neighbors are so in love," remarks Susan to her husband, "he hugs her, kisses her and strokes her hair. Why don't you do that?"
"Because I don't know her that well."
Donations
Knock on the door.
"Hello sir, would you like to contribute something to the old folks home?"
"Yes, actually." Beams the old man.
"Inge, put your jacket on and pack a suitcase!"
Shopping
An elderly couple is walking in the city, hand in hand, when they pass a jewellery store.
The wife turns to her husband with a smile:
"Love, would you buy me a chain?"
"Why?" Asks the husband, "Tired of being free?"
Qualities
A woman asks her husband:
"What do you like about me the most? My beautiful face or my sexy body?"
The husband gives her a long, appreciating look.
"Your sense of humor."
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Son - Dad, did you know that in some cultures, the husband doesn't know his wife before they are married?
Dad - That's true in all cultures, son!
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Maria, a devout Catholic, got married and had 10 children. After her first husband died, she remarried and had 10 more children. A few weeks after her second husband died, Maria also passed away. At Maria's funeral, the priest looked skyward and said, "At last, they're finally together." Her sister sitting in the front row said, "Excuse me, Father, but do you mean she and her first husband, or she and her second husband?" The priest replied, "I mean her legs."
In code we trust !
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Vivic wrote: Bob died
Bob died??? 
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It's OK, he's got plenty of regenerations left. With any luck, he'll be Canadian again, and not Scots.
I wanna be a eunuchs developer! Pass me a bread knife!
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Who would you like us to interview, and what questions would you like to ask?
cheers
Chris Maunder
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Chris Maunder wrote: Who would you like us to interview
Spike Milligan!
Chris Maunder wrote: what questions would you like to ask
"How often do elephants?"
"Is it true what they don't say about Sellars?"
There must be a tissue somewhere in the office, if you feel like crying.
I wanna be a eunuchs developer! Pass me a bread knife!
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Leslie Nielsen
who the hell is Shirley?
PooperPig - Coming Soon
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Yourself.
Wrong is evil and must be defeated. - Jeff Ello
Any organization is like a tree full of monkeys. The monkeys on top look down and see a tree full of smiling faces. The monkeys on the bottom look up and see nothing but assholes.
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Oh. 
Wrong is evil and must be defeated. - Jeff Ello
Any organization is like a tree full of monkeys. The monkeys on top look down and see a tree full of smiling faces. The monkeys on the bottom look up and see nothing but assholes.
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Blake Callans and Brian Hyder. The co-founders of PencilBlue which is a full stack CMS system currently in development on Node.js.
https://github.com/pencilblue[^]
Andreas Olofsson, CEO of Adapteva and the maker of the Parallella
http://www.adapteva.com/about-us/team/[^]
and a couple of our incumbent more proficient article writers on CodeProject, not sure which ones haven't been done yet.
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Bryce - coz hes awesome.
MCAD
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and what question would you like to ask this awesome Bryce? 
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why "how did you get to be so awesome Bryce?"
of course
duuuh
MCAD
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I didn't what to state the obvious..... 
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well you always start with a nice easy juicy full toss to kick the over off with
Bryce
MCAD
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A better question... Is it your awesomeness that makes you so great, or your greatness that makes you so awesome?
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now THAT is a question.
Bryce
MCAD
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"So Bryce. When did you get such a false opinion of yourself? Was it to combat your bed wetting?" 
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Nope - how did that work out for you?
Bryce
MCAD
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Me? It worked out well. I've been awesome since I was 3 weeks old
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