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A friend sent me these and thought a few might be applicable.
Mediocre Laws Of The Day
Law of Gravity - Any tool, nut, bolt, screw, when dropped, will roll to the least accessible corner.
Law of Probability- The probability of being watched is directly proportional to the stupidity of your act.
Supermarket Law - As soon as you get in the smallest line, the cashier will have to call for help.
Variation Law -If you change lines (or traffic lanes), the one you were in will always move faster than the one you are in now.
Law of the Bath - When the body is fully immersed in water, the telephone rings.
Law of Close Encounters - The probability of meeting someone you know increases dramatically when you are with someone you don't want to be seen with.
Law of the Result - When you try to prove to someone that a machine won't work, it will.
Law of Biomechanics - The severity of the itch is inversely proportional to the reach.
The Coffee Law - As soon as you sit down to a cup of hot coffee, your boss will ask you to do something which will last until the coffee is cold.
Murphy's Law of Lockers - If there are only 2 people in a locker room, they will have adjacent lockers.
Law of Physical Surfaces - The chances of an open-faced jam sandwich landing face down on a floor, are directly correlated to the newness and cost of the carpet or rug.
Law of Logical Argument-Anything is possible if you don't know what you are talking about.
Brown's Law of Physical Appearance - If the clothes fit, they're ugly.
Oliver's Law of Public Speaking- A closed mouth gathers no feet.
Wilson's Law of Commercial Marketing Strategy -As soon as you find a product that you really like, they will stop making it.
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These are all mere declinations of Murphy's law.
~RaGE();
I think words like 'destiny' are a way of trying to find order where none exists. - Christian Graus
Do not feed the troll ! - Common proverb
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The truth of the laws are well documented.
What me worry?
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50-50-90 law.
When you have a 50/50 chance of being right, you are going to be wrong 90% of the time.
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I will never again mention that I was the poster of the One Millionth Lounge Post, nor that it was complete drivel. Dalek Dave
CCC Link[ ^]
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Dalek Dave wrote: When you have a 50/50 chance of being right, you are going to be wrong 90% of the time.
Amen brother!
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'morning Dave. I laughed so hard that the people around my cubicle had to stand up and look what's wrong. I hope you're happy now that I'm looking like a weirdo. 
"Real men drive manual transmission" - Rajesh.
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I think you'll find it's not just 'look like' 
Panic, Chaos, Destruction. My work here is done.
Drink. Get drunk. Fall over - P O'H
OK, I will win to day or my name isn't Ethel Crudacre! - DD Ethel Crudacre
I cannot live by bread alone. Bacon and ketchup are needed as well. - Trollslayer
Have a bit more patience with newbies. Of course some of them act dumb - they're often *students*, for heaven's sake - Terry Pratchett
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Cole's Law -- thinly sliced cabbage.
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Don't forget the mayonnaise!
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Mike Hankey wrote: Wilson's Law of Commercial Marketing Strategy -As soon as you find a product that you really like, they will stop making it.
Or, at the very least, stop selling it at places you shop. Every time I find something new to put on rice that I like, it stops being sold within 2-3 trips to the grocery store. I need to learn to stock up (after which of course it will continue to be sold until the moment I run out).
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