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On Sunday, we setup our 12-yar-old artificial pre-lit christmas tree. For the last few years, we've been setting up the tree and leaving the lights on for a few hours before decorating it because we wanted to make sure it was going to work as it should. Additionally, we ALWAYS put a fire extinguisher within immediate reach so we can resolve issues, should they arise. Good thing, too.
The tree had been on for a few hours, and we were sitting on the couch - I was watching tv, and my wife was playing a game on her iPad, when suddenly, we heard a "WOOMPH" sound, and a small fireball erupted where the tree plugs into the extension cord.
My wife, without looking up from her iPad, said, "Honey, the tree is on fire", and continued playing her game (she is totally unflappable). I got up, unplugged the tree from the wall, and put the fire out with the afore mentioned fire extinguisher, and sat back down on the couch.
Again, without looking up, she said, "I guess we need a new tree."
I said, "Get a nice one", as I started channel surfing.
Tip - If you don't have a fire extinguisher next to your Christmas tree, go out and get one.
".45 ACP - because shooting twice is just silly" - JSOP, 2010
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You can never have too much ammo - unless you're swimming, or on fire. - JSOP, 2010
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When you pry the gun from my cold dead hands, be careful - the barrel will be very hot. - JSOP, 2013
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Or you can keep the trees outside the house, where they belong :P
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Which brings up another funny story. 
One Christmas back when I lived in San Diego, we were still using live trees, and one year, we put our tree next to the garage, and promptly forgot it was there. One day the following February, the neighbor saw it (by this time it was completely devoid of needles), and called the fire department claiming it was a fire hazard. The fire inspector came by and told us we couldn't keep the tree where it was, and said he'd be back in a few days to make sure it wasn't there any more.
So I planted the tree, right next to the fence, in plain view of the neighbor's window - so they could see it.
The fire inspector came by a few days later as promised, and I met him in the driveway. He asked if we got rid of the tree, and I said, "Not technically, no, but it's not next to the garage any more."
I pointed at it and said, "There it is."
He stood there looking at it for a minute, and said, "Are you watering it?"
I said, "Yep, the mulch is still wet. See?"
He said, "I honestly have never seen anyone do this, but it looks legit to me. How does your neighbor feel about it?"
I shrugged my shoulders, and he left. That's the last I heard about it from a city official. The neighbor wasn't pleased. At all.
".45 ACP - because shooting twice is just silly" - JSOP, 2010
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You can never have too much ammo - unless you're swimming, or on fire. - JSOP, 2010
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When you pry the gun from my cold dead hands, be careful - the barrel will be very hot. - JSOP, 2013
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My little story.
Not technically a Christmas tree but it was a pine tree of the sort commonly used.
Anyhow, all of about 8 years old I plucked a small tree (all of 6 inches) from a forestry plot. (It was actually during Christmas break we were walking the forest.) Took it home, put it in a pot, and it grew. Year later too big for the pot (about 6' - forestry hybrids grow fast) planted it in the lawn.
About 10 years later, long since we had moved from that house but heard from a neighbor they had to close the road for over half a day and bring in professional help to remove what had become a massive pine tree.
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Pine trees are an abomination in anything but a pine forest. The needs poison the soil underneath the tree so nothing will compete with the tree. We just cut down 6 of the bloody things from the back yard and it will take a number of years to rehabilitate the soil.
Never underestimate the power of human stupidity -
RAH
I'm old. I know stuff - JSOP
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This reminds me of a Simpsons episode where Bart accidentally burned down the tree and presents.
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Never been a National Lampoon fan, but that was funny.
Charlie Gilley
<italic>Stuck in a dysfunctional matrix from which I must escape...
"Where liberty dwells, there is my country." B. Franklin, 1783
“They who can give up essential liberty to obtain a little temporary safety deserve neither liberty nor safety.” BF, 1759
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John Simmons / outlaw programmer wrote: My wife, without looking up from her iPad, said, "Honey, the tree is on fire", and continued playing her game (she is totally unflappable).
John Simmons / outlaw programmer wrote: Again, without looking up, she said, "I guess we need a new tree."
I like her style. JSOP, this one's a keeper.
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Great advice, John. I always get live ones, and generally use LEDs for lighting, but I still like to have an extinguisher nearby. You never know...
Will Rogers never met me.
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Did your ex put the hot in psychotic?
Sent from my Amstrad PC 1640
Never throw anything away, Griff
Bad command or file name. Bad, bad command! Sit! Stay! Staaaay...
AntiTwitter: @DalekDave is now a follower!
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You must be psycic!
Latest Article - A Concise Overview of Threads
Learning to code with python is like learning to swim with those little arm floaties. It gives you undeserved confidence and will eventually drown you. - DangerBunny
Artificial intelligence is the only remedy for natural stupidity. - CDP1802
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I'm aFreud she put in the syc instead.
"the debugger doesn't tell me anything because this code compiles just fine" - random QA comment
"Facebook is where you tell lies to your friends. Twitter is where you tell the truth to strangers." - chriselst
"I don't drink any more... then again, I don't drink any less." - Mike Mullikins uncle
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well she sure put de worst in divorced 
"If we don't change direction, we'll end up where we're going"
modified 30-Nov-18 11:28am.
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Yes and if i'd known how happy I'd be without her I'd have done it years before I did.
I may not be that good looking, or athletic, or funny, or talented, or smart
I forgot where I was going with this but I do know I love bacon!
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Nah, that's just crazy talk.
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Z answer Y (about X) is O so mysterious, wrapped in lawyers of complications.
| Ravings en masse^ |
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| "The difference between genius and stupidity is that genius has its limits." - Albert Einstein | | "If you are searching for perfection in others, then you seek disappointment. If you are seek perfection in yourself, then you will find failure." - Balboos HaGadol Mar 2010 |
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Dunno, I started out dating a nymphomaniac. Very quickly, the nympho disappeared, but the maniac stayed! 
Anything that is unrelated to elephants is irrelephant
Anonymous
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The problem with quotes on the internet is that you can never tell if they're genuine
Winston Churchill, 1944
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Never argue with a fool. Onlookers may not be able to tell the difference.
Mark Twain
modified 30-Nov-18 15:28pm.
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No, but the team shirt I had made for my first darts team said, "Let's Put The Fun Back In Dysfunctional!"
Will Rogers never met me.
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The word "analyst" contains the word "anal".
".45 ACP - because shooting twice is just silly" - JSOP, 2010
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You can never have too much ammo - unless you're swimming, or on fire. - JSOP, 2010
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When you pry the gun from my cold dead hands, be careful - the barrel will be very hot. - JSOP, 2013
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so analized any cute interesting clients lately?
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Remember you can't have a slaughter without laughter. 
Did you ever see history portrayed as an old man with a wise brow and pulseless heart, weighing all things in the balance of reason?
Is not rather the genius of history like an eternal, imploring maiden, full of fire, with a burning heart and flaming soul, humanly warm and humanly beautiful?
--Zachris Topelius
Training a telescope on one’s own belly button will only reveal lint. You like that? You go right on staring at it. I prefer looking at galaxies.
-- Sarah Hoyt
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Dan Neely wrote: Remember you can't have a slaughter without laughter
Or a funeral without fun.
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They go together like a horse and cartridge.
I wanna be a eunuchs developer! Pass me a bread knife!
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The boss acting up again?
modified 20-Oct-19 21:02pm.
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