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Once you learn how to play banjo it gets kinda boring.
I do all my own stunts, but never intentionally!
JaxCoder.com
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I just got a mail from one of our project leaders: Our customer is wondering what this message from your code in their Windows logs means:
"ERROR: Uh-uh, this is no good!"
Turns out I had put in a null check for an object that should NEVER, EVER be null, and SOMEHOW it had managed to achieve it anyway... 
Now I have to change the error message to something meaningful. I HATE that! 
Anything that is unrelated to elephants is irrelephant
Anonymous
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The problem with quotes on the internet is that you can never tell if they're genuine
Winston Churchill, 1944
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Never argue with a fool. Onlookers may not be able to tell the difference.
Mark Twain
modified 5-Apr-19 5:28am.
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At least you checked.
I'd rather have "Uh-uh" than "This application has encountered a problem and needs to close ...", particularly if I'd done a load of typing...
Sent from my Amstrad PC 1640
Never throw anything away, Griff
Bad command or file name. Bad, bad command! Sit! Stay! Staaaay...
AntiTwitter: @DalekDave is now a follower!
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I have just such a case right now. It looks like Powerpoint (of all useless things) crashes and takes the WinForms program that started Powerpoint to view a document with it. The error happens in the black Win32 heart of the WinForms, in the main form's window procedure. Even if I catch the resulting exception, the program will still exit it's Main(9 and terminate.
Now, what shall we write into the error message?
How about this: Quote: Dear user, Powerpoint just committed ritual suicide and took our program with it. This is of course your problem, as you foolishly assumed that Mickeysoft can get anything right. If you still wish to complain about the problem, bug Mickeysoft with it and not us.
I have lived with several Zen masters - all of them were cats.
His last invention was an evil Lasagna. It didn't kill anyone, and it actually tasted pretty good.
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Johnny J. wrote: Now I have to change the error message to something meaningful.
May I suggest:
Divide By Cucumber Error. Please Reinstall Universe And Reboot. Or maybe:
Out of Cheese Error - Redo From Start
"These people looked deep within my soul and assigned me a number based on the order in which I joined."
- Homer
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or "Go directly to jail. Do not pass Go. Do not collect $200." 
Anything that is unrelated to elephants is irrelephant
Anonymous
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The problem with quotes on the internet is that you can never tell if they're genuine
Winston Churchill, 1944
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Never argue with a fool. Onlookers may not be able to tell the difference.
Mark Twain
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On the bright side, the benefit of using such messages is that you have something unique you can search for in the code base. Nothing worse than seeing a message and it's so generic you have no idea where it came from.
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...I just called to check on him, they said "No change yet!" 
Ba-Tish!
Anything that is unrelated to elephants is irrelephant
Anonymous
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The problem with quotes on the internet is that you can never tell if they're genuine
Winston Churchill, 1944
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Never argue with a fool. Onlookers may not be able to tell the difference.
Mark Twain
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Stop abusing fat kids as a piggy bank!
I have lived with several Zen masters - all of them were cats.
His last invention was an evil Lasagna. It didn't kill anyone, and it actually tasted pretty good.
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I thought he was going to market and needed the money... 
Anything that is unrelated to elephants is irrelephant
Anonymous
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The problem with quotes on the internet is that you can never tell if they're genuine
Winston Churchill, 1944
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Never argue with a fool. Onlookers may not be able to tell the difference.
Mark Twain
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No, this little piggy stayed at home...
Sent from my Amstrad PC 1640
Never throw anything away, Griff
Bad command or file name. Bad, bad command! Sit! Stay! Staaaay...
AntiTwitter: @DalekDave is now a follower!
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My car, while going over 200 km/h on the way to work: Motor error: See your local service station for repairs.
What? Is it on fire? Or about to explode? How bad is it? Can I still drive it to work or should I pull over and let them tow it away? Or what? At least it does not have an automatic ejection seat and can't shoot me to the moon without warning.
I have lived with several Zen masters - all of them were cats.
His last invention was an evil Lasagna. It didn't kill anyone, and it actually tasted pretty good.
modified 5-Apr-19 5:05am.
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Could be ok(ish), could be bad - the only way to find out is access the OBD error code and see. (Which is what your garage / recovery service will do. You can buy a cheap OBD adapter on FleaBay and use the free Torque app (Android and iPhony) to read and clear them).
I've had a couple: one was the "air flow mass sensor" which was fine for a couple of years until it failed properly, the car went into "limp home mode", and the ECU had to be ripped apart to fix it, the other was the "cam hall effect sensor" which will stop you in your tracks if you ignore it. The air mass sensor cost £600 and two weeks to fix, the cam sensor £20 and 15 minutes with a small spanner ...
Don't ignore it, check your codes and see what it is.
Sent from my Amstrad PC 1640
Never throw anything away, Griff
Bad command or file name. Bad, bad command! Sit! Stay! Staaaay...
AntiTwitter: @DalekDave is now a follower!
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The car did not go into any emergency modes. Nothing at all happened, except for that error message. Now I have an appointment on monday to find out what's going on.
I have lived with several Zen masters - all of them were cats.
His last invention was an evil Lasagna. It didn't kill anyone, and it actually tasted pretty good.
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CodeWraith wrote: My car, while going over 200 km/h on the way to work
You take the autobahn on the way to work, or just cut through some quiet neighborhoods? Either way, that doesn't quite sound like "rush hour" (despite the irony of the name).
JSOP likes to talk about his Mustang, but I don't think he's ever lead anyone to think he was driving it irresponsibly.
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dandy72 wrote: autobahn on the way to work
A9, leading right out of Munich. No speed limit after crawling past Garching, if you see over the professional English obstacles along the way.
I have lived with several Zen masters - all of them were cats.
His last invention was an evil Lasagna. It didn't kill anyone, and it actually tasted pretty good.
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I'd say I'm jealous of your commute...but then I work from home. 
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Same thing when I head in the other direction[^] to have some fun. That picture lies a little. The mountains are 60 miles away and you can only see them on very clear days from here. Only the zoom makes it look like the mountains begin right after the back door. But what are 60 miles good for?
Right. 
I have lived with several Zen masters - all of them were cats.
His last invention was an evil Lasagna. It didn't kill anyone, and it actually tasted pretty good.
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Until you get to Allershausen, there is sometimes the dynamic 120 limit.
M.D.V. 
If something has a solution... Why do we have to worry about?. If it has no solution... For what reason do we have to worry about?
Help me to understand what I'm saying, and I'll explain it better to you
Rating helpful answers is nice, but saying thanks can be even nicer.
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Not this morning.
I have lived with several Zen masters - all of them were cats.
His last invention was an evil Lasagna. It didn't kill anyone, and it actually tasted pretty good.
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... I've had him as my doctor for the past 25 years! 
Ba-Tish!
Anything that is unrelated to elephants is irrelephant
Anonymous
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The problem with quotes on the internet is that you can never tell if they're genuine
Winston Churchill, 1944
-
Never argue with a fool. Onlookers may not be able to tell the difference.
Mark Twain
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Sounds like we used to have the same doctor...
I'll drink to that!
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Damn it, Jim, I'm a doctor, not a bartender!
I have lived with several Zen masters - all of them were cats.
His last invention was an evil Lasagna. It didn't kill anyone, and it actually tasted pretty good.
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The doctor is going to ask you to stop drinking if you ruin his fancy doctor desk with your beer mug stains!
"It is easy to decipher extraterrestrial signals after deciphering Javascript and VB6 themselves.", ISanti[ ^]
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I see you subscribe to the same school of thought as one of my grandfathers before he passed*. As he got on in years his doctor put him on a medication and told him he wasn't allowed to drink while taking it. So he got a second opinion which told him the same thing... so he got a third opinion which was also the same.
Now my grandfather was not one to be discouraged so he got a fourth opinion. This particular doctor said he could have one drink a day but no more.
Shame the doctor didn't specify how big that one drink could be, I've never seen anyone mix a margarita quite that strong before or since. 
* His death was unrelated to the medicine or the drinking.
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