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It's been one of those days when I've felt like I'm bashing my head against a brick wall.
It's not any single thing, but more a combination of them...broken builds, frustration at old code, lack of specifications for new products, out of date tools (we're still waiting for Visual Studio.NET at work - I've had a copy for home use since August 2002!) and so on...not to mention the emotional load I'm carrying outside of work.
I shed a few tears today, but at least it passed quickly...and as always something happened to make me smile. About an hour before leaving work I wandered into the canteen to refill my mug (I know - I drink way too much coffee at work) and discovered that some considerate soul had left some lemon cake out for anyone that fancied a nibble.
It may not be chocolate, but this girl ain't fussy...or at least, not when it comes to free nibbles!
Anna
Homepage | Tears and Laughter
"Be yourself - not what others think you should be"
- Marcia Graesch
"Anna's just a sexy-looking lesbian tart"
- A friend, trying to wind me up. It didn't work.
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Note to self, we need an emoticon for a box of chocolates
I hope your week gets better Anna...
Marcie
CP Blog[^]
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Marcie Robillard (Datagrid Girl) wrote:
Note to self, we need an emoticon for a box of chocolates
We sure do.
Marcie Robillard (Datagrid Girl) wrote:
I hope your week gets better Anna...
Thanks hun. I hope so too...it feels totally mind numbing right now.
Anna
Homepage | Tears and Laughter
"Be yourself - not what others think you should be"
- Marcia Graesch
"Anna's just a sexy-looking lesbian tart"
- A friend, trying to wind me up. It didn't work.
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I'm kind of afraid to ask, but what is an acoustic tracking system?
Marcie
CP Blog[^]
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Hi Marcie,
It's a system for tracking vehicles (ROVs, AUVs etc.) underwater using sonar. The basic premise is to measure the time taken to transmit a sonar signal (analogue tone-burst or digital spread spectrum) from a transmitter to a receiver. From that, the distance between them can be calculated, and (assuming you have enough measurements) the position of the vehicle computed.
There's a pretty good description on my company's website - see http://www.sonardyne.co.uk/theory.htm[^].
You'll often find our systems used in marine survey or oil exploration. An example of the former is the survey of the wreck of U166[^] in the Gulf of Mexico last year. It's an interesting area to work in, but unfortunately not leading edge as far as the software is concerned - though working on the UI I do get a fair bit of freedom to innvovate.
Anna
Homepage | Tears and Laughter
"Be yourself - not what others think you should be"
- Marcia Graesch
"Anna's just a sexy-looking lesbian tart"
- A friend, trying to wind me up. It didn't work.
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Neat! Thanks for the explanation Anna, it sounds like pretty cool stuff.
Marcie
CP Blog[^]
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Anytime hun!
It certainly can be...although I've not had a chance to get away from my desk onto a boat for a couple of years now and I'm getting rather fed up with the office...
Anna
Homepage | Tears and Laughter
"Be yourself - not what others think you should be"
- Marcia Graesch
"Anna's just a sexy-looking lesbian tart"
- A friend, trying to wind me up. It didn't work.
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Anna,
How long ago did you work for Sonardyne?
I used to work with Nauticos (probably too small for you to know about), and then Oceaneering (too bog for you not to have ).
IIRC, we used some of your USBL 'ducers and dots, though I can't remember models.
I got out of that world in '05, after too much time away from the family.
----------
Have you had our beard electrolocized (sp?)?
If so, how long did it take, and how painful (physical and wallet) was it?
My wife likes me clean shaven. I do to, except for the shaving part.
Thanks,
Richard
Opacity, the new Transparency.
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Hi Richard,
Oceaneering is a name that indeed rings a bell. Did you know Bruce Baker (our Product Manager) by any chance?
IIRC I was at Sonardyne from June 1998 to August 2004. I worked mostly on the generic Pharos product (which became Fusion LBL/USBL/Navigation and so on). Really interesting stuff to work on, and as I was mostly chained to my desk by the company I didn't have to pull any long offshore stints beyond the occasional week long trials in Plymouth Sound.
I honestly couldn't tell you how much I've spent on electro and laser. I did about 16 sessions of laser in 2002-2003 (£220 a time, though I could have got it cheaper with a different laser type) but I'm still having occasional electrolysis (must be close to 200 hrs now) to kill off the outliers. Hair follicles can lie dormant for something like 7 years, so it does take a while.
That said, laser's a reasonably quick and cheap way of "thinning it down". Shop around (Lasercare are one of the big ones) and it's about £100 a session.
Anna
Tech Blog | Visual Lint
"Why would anyone prefer to wield a weapon that takes both hands at once, when they could use a lighter (and obviously superior) weapon that allows you to wield multiple ones at a time, and thus supports multi-paradigm carnage?"
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Pole dancing![^]
The scene of the crime? Mummies[^] in Pattaya.
It was quite a night. After going to see Natta dancing on her final night at the Honeypot Bar on Soi 9, we grabbed some some roadside munchies and took a Baht Bus (much more fun than a taxi) for the trip to the club at 2am.
I've not danced so hard in years (I broke a heel jumping off stage at one point!)...and when they started playing rock at 4am that was it, and I joined my friend Helen for some impromptu pole-dancing.
It was rather fun, and I'll certainly do it again...
Anna
Homepage | Tears and Laughter
"Be yourself - not what others think you should be"
- Marcia Graesch
"Anna's just a sexy-looking lesbian tart"
- A friend, trying to wind me up. It didn't work.
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Hi everyone!
I've now managed to get a (somewhat intermittent and only 26k ) net connection established here in room 307 at the Mercure Hotel in Chonburi so while I've a little time this afternoon I thought it was time I said hello and thank you for all the moral support I received before embarking on my big adventure. I'm not getting time to track what's happening here (or anywhere else for that matter) so my apologies if I'm a little slow replying!
The big question of course is "How did it go?". Well I'm happy to say that the surgery (on the 14th) went so smoothly that Dr. Suporn completed it in 5 hours - which surprised even him! The staff at the clinic & hospital have all been brilliant (several I now consider to be close personal friends) and I've only had two causes for complaint - neither major, and both being dealt with. Neither affects me in particular, by the way.
I'm healing well and no longer in any significant pain, although I've learnt a fair bit about pain and painkillers (anyone tried morphine? ).
The atmosphere out here is fantastic, and I've met some new good friends - both at the clinic and other patients from around the world. Quite an adventure. I've also kept a very detailed diary which tells the story of my adventure here.
I hope it's not "too much information" for anyone - although the diary[^] is candid and detailed, I've restricted the pictures that bring it to life (with one exception at the beginning of the third page which I felt necessary for those following me - and it's not gruesome in any way) to ones unlikely to upset anyone or the organisation they work for.
It goes without saying that if you or your organisation are likely to find the content difficult, please don't read it. If you do then complain, I'll set my halberd on you...
Hugs to everyone. I've been thinking of you all during my adventure here.
Until I get back, khàwp khun khâ!
Anna
Homepage | Tears and Laughter
"Be yourself - not what others think you should be"
- Marcia Graesch
"Anna's just a sexy-looking lesbian tart"
- A friend, trying to wind me up. It didn't work.
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I'm quite frankly stunned.
After three weeks of what can only be described as sheer emotional torture, something's finally happened to swing things back entirely the other way. I'm not out of the woods yet, but this will most certainly help!
I originally made enquiries of the Suporn Clinic[^] about my surgery (combined Genital Reassignment Surgery and Facial Feminisation Surgery) in June, at which time they weren't yet scheduling for January 2004, when I was intending to have surgery. I'd already moved the date forwards once (from Spring, which I'd opted for in part to fit in with work) after realising I couldn't wait that long.
When the Clinic opened its scheduling at the end of August I was informed that they were no longer booking combined (GRS + FFS) procedures (for reasons I completely understand). However, that left me with a problem, as my company limits paid sick leave to 13 weeks per calendar year.
With my GRS booked for 21st January, I just couldn't see a way to fit in the FFS the same year...and the lack of certainly and doubt in my mind about what to do has only served to aggravate the problems of isolation and resultant depression I was already having at work (which were already bad enough, believe me).
By this Monday morning I was finally "with it" enough to write back to the clinic and inform them of the difficulties I was having. I also wrote an initial enquiry about FFS to Brian Musgrove in Manchester (a UK surgeon specialising in FFS), as a possible fallback.
I haven't had a reply from Musgrove yet but it's now rather academic, as yesterday morning I had an email from the Suporn Clinic informing me that a cancellation date might be available this year. A flurry of emails ensued, the end result of which is that as of yesterday evening my GRS has now been rebooked for 14th November!!!
Words aren't adequate here. I'm absolutely and totally stunned, and believe me if I had a bottle of champaigne handy right now there's be a party down here tonight for sure!
Incidentally, the date I had booked for GRS (21st January) is now the date of my FFS, so those who expected to bump into me in Thailand then still will...I'll just be a bit more post-op than I expected to be by the evening of 21st January...
8 weeks to go!
Anna
Homepage | Tears and Laughter
"Be yourself - not what others think you should be"
- Marcia Graesch
"Anna's just a sexy-looking lesbian tart"
- A friend, trying to wind me up. It didn't work.
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The thought had crossed my mind!
I'm taking my laptop with me with a Wi-Fi card (you never know!) but if all else fails the clinic provides a machine with internet access for use by patients, and there are internet cafes in Chonburi and Pattaya.
I won't be totally in hiding, although most of what I write will go to the TS support groups (there'll be way too much detail for CP!).
You'll certainly hear from me occasionally though, I promise you that.
Anna
Homepage | Tears and Laughter
"Be yourself - not what others think you should be"
- Marcia Graesch
"Anna's just a sexy-looking lesbian tart"
- A friend, trying to wind me up. It didn't work.
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As a rule, yes.
Having said that, there's always an exception if you look hard enough. I know of one girl who's a theatre nurse and had hers done under a local anaesthetic!! Apparently there was a student nurse in theatre whose only job was to hold a mirror so the patient could watch the surgeon working on her!!!
I couldn't do that, that's for certain.
Anna
Homepage | Tears and Laughter
"Be yourself - not what others think you should be"
- Marcia Graesch
"Anna's just a sexy-looking lesbian tart"
- A friend, trying to wind me up. It didn't work.
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Well initial recovery from GRS takes about 3-4 months, but the body takes about 2 years to adjust fully...especially when it comes to the brain remapping where nerve endings go!
In addition, for the first few months I'll have to spend about 4 hours a day doing "post-op maintenance" which will mean I'll have to be up at 5am in order to get it out of the way before heading off to work. That's rather daunting, but it's a small price to pay really...and it should ease off a bit by the summer.
I'll be out in Thailand for about a month (from 11th November to 12th December I believe) for the GRS op, then I'm flying back out on 18th January for my FFS.
I should be back in the UK for good in mid February, but I don't have to be back at work until the start of March.
Anna
Homepage | Tears and Laughter
"Be yourself - not what others think you should be"
- Marcia Graesch
"Anna's just a sexy-looking lesbian tart"
- A friend, trying to wind me up. It didn't work.
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Yesterday was a very sad day. Last night I heard the tragic news that Debbie Fox (one of the girls I met at Trans-MISSION earlier this month) had committed suicide.
I really don't know what to say. Although I only met her once in person I could tell from that meeting and her writings on the two groups we were both members of that she was a warm, caring and understanding person and always did her best to help others.
Her loss is a horrible shock, and I know she'll be terribly missed.
My friend Carol-Nerise wrote this poem in memory of Debbie when I told her the news tonight (which was a lovely gesture considering she didn't know her).
Deep feeling, hurting like hell,
Grief that needs healing,
Tears filled the well.
Lights lit, lifting our prayer,
That she gained light and peace,
She knows we will always care.
The healing thought in all this pain
Is that in that loving light
We will meet again.
Rest in peace Debbie. You're in our prayers, and the TS Community won't ever forget you.
Thank you also to those within the CP community who've sent their best wishes. I know she'd appreciate your care and compassion.
Anna
Homepage | Tears and Laughter
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Mind you I haven't been that drunk in quite a while!
I think in total there were 21 people there (from all around the country), some of whom I've known for a while (but not met face to face) and others who may well become new friends.
Of the lot of us, there was only one guy, so you can imagine he got wound up pretty mercillessly (and loved it!).
From the comments the day after I think I made a bit of an impression, although I'm not sure whether that's because of the rather gothic outfit I turned up in (hence the new pic), my odd sense of humour or the fact that I was briefly<super>* wandering around naked (apart from a g-string) in the morning...
<super>* No pun intended. Honest.
As virtually everyone there (bar two, I think) were transfolk and some are living "in stealth" I'm afraid I can't publish the pics, but I can tell you it was one helluva party, and it's done wonders for my self-confidence.
Next, I'm off clubbing in London this Saturday. Woo!
Anna
Homepage | My life in tears
"Be yourself - not what others think you should be"
- Marcia Graesch
"Anna's just a sexy-looking lesbian tart"
- A friend, trying to wind me up. It didn't work.
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Anna-Jayne Metcalfe wrote:
because of the rather gothic outfit
Maybe that is meant with the g-string... Didn't know where the 'g' came from...
Anna-Jayne Metcalfe wrote:
I can't publish the pics, but I can tell you it was one helluva party
... hmm, sounds intresting, pictures from a gothic string..
Olli
"Ooooooh, they have the internet on computers now!" Homer Simpson
+ = NULL :=>
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Olli wrote:
Maybe that is meant with the g-string... Didn't know where the 'g' came from...
Er...no. They're panties, hun. I don't wear briefs, only g-strings.
Olli wrote:
... hmm, sounds intresting, pictures from a gothic string..
Now there's an image!
The piccies are actually pretty tame - but I can't show them as some of those there are living "in stealth" - i.e. most of the people around them don't know they're transsexual. I always ask before uploading pics.
The ones from this weekend are a bit more fun - and I will be uploading those...as soon as I receive the other half of the pics from one of my friends.
Anna
Homepage | Tears and Laughter
"Be yourself - not what others think you should be"
- Marcia Graesch
"Anna's just a sexy-looking lesbian tart"
- A friend, trying to wind me up. It didn't work.
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Right now I'm staring at the ResOrg source code trying to adjust the various bits of existing UI to handle multi-file conflict analysis.
Although the core code is done (and I'm very happy with it), fixing the bits of UI it affects is taking ages...and I'm finding my concentration lasts about as long as the time it takes to cook beans on toast. At this rate, it's going to be a while.
Getting through transition helps hugely, but really, I know I can do better than this. If it wasn't for the amount of time it takes to do a release (help/website/article updates etc.) I'd do it in stages.
Hopefully the fog will lift a bit once the fallout from the divorce has settled in the Spring.
Now, where's my thinking head gone?
Anna
www.annasplace.me.uk
"Be yourself - not what others think you should be" - Marcia Graesch
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Anna-Jayne Metcalfe wrote:
Now, where's my thinking head gone?
What you need is a good nights sleep, and then a strong dosage of guarana/caffeine. You'll be producing code like crazy.
Standard Disclaimer: Too much Guarana/Caffeine may give you a slight headache later on.
--
I don't exist when you don't see me
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