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Bloody hell, you like that sound, it was always the precursor to a period of frustration and irritation for me, I loathe it! Compuserve, thank bog it eventually closed its connection!
Never underestimate the power of human stupidity
RAH
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The sounds is a reminder of how things use to be. It was more seeing the trace of it. Never crossed my mind of visualing the noise.
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Ah, modems. The best answering machine for a telemarketing call. 
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I suppose a 32-year programming career will do that to your resume. Even after I reduced each job to a single line ("I worked there and did programming stuff."), it was STILL two pages long. I finally got it down to three pages (not including the "Skills" pages).
".45 ACP - because shooting twice is just silly" - JSOP, 2010
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You can never have too much ammo - unless you're swimming, or on fire. - JSOP, 2010
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When you pry the gun from my cold dead hands, be careful - the barrel will be very hot. - JSOP, 2013
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Three pages is good. Mine goes to eight pages as well but I push a clear summary of skills (ordered by what I am trying to "sell" to the recruiter, key ones in bold) to the first page and then bullet-point each job after that (also with the key points in bold). That way the recruiter can just read the summary and if anything is interested skim through the first few jobs (in reverse chronological order of course) to see if more info is forthcoming.
- I would love to change the world, but they won’t give me the source code.
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Just consolidate. Summarise a bunch of jobs into a paragraph, in blocks of time. At the end reference an addendum with a full list.
If you have presented your summary objectives, key attributes and recent activity (i.e. Page 1) well, then no one will give 2 hoots really about anything that follows.
If you haven't presented page 1 well, no one will care about the rest anyway, because it will be in the bin before you know it.
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Quote: Summarise a bunch of jobs into a paragraph, in blocks of time
Yeah, I did that when I was contracting. Instead of putting are the individual places down I put down the consulting agency name and a block of time. That saved a couple of pages.
I had one case where I flew through the telephone interviews and the initial face to face with flying colours and the IT manager was starting to talk about what I might be doing in more detail when I started but then we had the "final say" from the big non-IT boss who insisted on "vetting" all final candidates. He came into the room, glanced at a copy of my CV with it's long list of impressive achievements and wide experience and said "You seem to be constantly changing jobs, that is a red flag for me, we need someone who will stick with us. Thanks for coming in, goodbye!" and that was it. The IT manager walked me out to my car apologising all the way. I heard from a junior colleague of mine, who actually got a job there, that he quit a couple of months later. That's when I really looked at consolidating my CV.
- I would love to change the world, but they won’t give me the source code.
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My response would have been:
"So, even with the economy being what it is, forcing companies to down-size and consolidate, and larger companies choosing to go off-shore instead of hiring American workers, and despite the fact that I hire on as a full-time employee 95% of the time thinking I've at last found a decent employer that's interested in retention, you're going to assume I'm a job hopper simply because I've held several positions within the market environment I've just described, only to be essentially victimized by corporate bean counters more concerned with how LITTLE they can pay their employees while demanding uncompensated overtime and extreme loyalty yet not returning said services in kind, you're going to hold ME responsible? Well then, f*ck you very much."
".45 ACP - because shooting twice is just silly" - JSOP, 2010
-----
You can never have too much ammo - unless you're swimming, or on fire. - JSOP, 2010
-----
When you pry the gun from my cold dead hands, be careful - the barrel will be very hot. - JSOP, 2013
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Extraordinarily well said, even by your usually high standards! 
Will Rogers never met me.
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I approve of this comment!
I just wish I had said it at the time.
- I would love to change the world, but they won’t give me the source code.
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Mine goes back about twenty years (on two pages), but anything beyond ten years ago is no longer relevant to the current job market.
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I have been using the format from this article for many years and manage to keep the resume to three pages: Contracting for Dummies: The CV/Resume[^]
I don't think anyone is really interested in roles more than 5 years old other than to show how long you've been in the business and how long you worked for each employer.
"If you think it's expensive to hire a professional to do the job, wait until you hire an amateur." Red Adair.
Those who seek perfection will only find imperfection
nils illegitimus carborundum
me, me, me
me, in pictures
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I just write the 90s off to Consulting, the 80s off to learning and the 70s off to stoned. That leaves me just the last decade to work with, the only relevant stuff anyway! I can fit that summary into 1 page (ifI screw with the margins).
Never underestimate the power of human stupidity
RAH
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How on Earth did you get it down from TWO pages to THREE pages? Has the mathematical arrangement of the known universe gone crazily kaput?
Getting information off the Internet is like taking a drink from a fire hydrant.
- Mitchell Kapor
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Well, the two page thing was satirical comment, the honest effort to reduce the page count ended up at three pages.
".45 ACP - because shooting twice is just silly" - JSOP, 2010
-----
You can never have too much ammo - unless you're swimming, or on fire. - JSOP, 2010
-----
When you pry the gun from my cold dead hands, be careful - the barrel will be very hot. - JSOP, 2013
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...but based on QA, I suspect it could be... 
Got an Office code?[^]
The only instant messaging I do involves my middle finger.
English doesn't borrow from other languages.
English follows other languages down dark alleys, knocks them over and goes through their pockets for loose grammar.
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HA, they didn't even read the "Key".
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Compared to what happens in most Asian countries everyday, QA on CP could be a nunnery !
bill
"What Turing gave us for the first time (and without Turing you just couldn't do any of this) is he gave us a way of thinking about and taking seriously and thinking in a disciplined way about phenomena that have, as I like to say, trillions of moving parts.
Until the late 20th century, nobody knew how to take seriously a machine with a trillion moving parts. It's just mind-boggling." Daniel C. Dennett
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OriginalGriff wrote: ...but based on QA, I suspect it could be..
It's a big problem and tyey're very easy to get, this guy was just lazy!
There's very few software titles that you can't get pirated, or dang near anything else you want. Except the blond that lives next door to me..., well that's another story. 
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Why many hate this statement and do not advise using it! I used it when I started programming with BASIC and GWBASIC. It is also found in the C#. Troubles are based on the programmer who is misusing it.
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Because in nearly every case I have seen of it's use in C# or C++ it has been unnecessary, and only served to both confuse the code and show that the person who used it did not understand what he was doing.
goto is not evil - but it is a "rule breaker" in that it violates all the principles of good code design and so using it should only be done with care. The problem is that it it taught on courses by lazy tutors as an easy way to get them started and then gets abused later because the students consider it "Normal" and don't learn to structure code well in the first place as a result.
If you had grown up with GOTO as pretty much the only form of flow control (as I did) you would probably understand how easy it is to create impenetrable code with it, and why it should be discouraged until the coder is experienced enough to know when it is appropriate. About five years of "real" coding should be enough. But by then, he is probably experienced enough to know that there are probably better ways to achieve the same result...
The only instant messaging I do involves my middle finger.
English doesn't borrow from other languages.
English follows other languages down dark alleys, knocks them over and goes through their pockets for loose grammar.
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Very well put!
The only goto-like statement I use is a break statement.
However even at the beginning of coding in .Net I was uncomfortable using it, shaping my logic so that I did not need to use it.
At university, back in 1988, I was taught never to use a goto statement - one very rare case necessitating its use in COBOL being the exception.
“That which can be asserted without evidence, can be dismissed without evidence.”
― Christopher Hitchens
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*shudder*
First language I was taught, that. Then FORTRAN to follow, which was a breath of (what seemed like structured at the time) fresh air in comparison! 
The only instant messaging I do involves my middle finger.
English doesn't borrow from other languages.
English follows other languages down dark alleys, knocks them over and goes through their pockets for loose grammar.
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That's the usual reasoning and perfectly ok in most cases.
What if I need to squeeze out a better performance? Readability and maintainability now are secondary. I have done this often enough in the past and still do it today.
Writing software is not a religion and mindlessly reciting and enforcing rules does not help at all. The rules may have good reasons, but you must always understand their goals. Break them if your goals happen to be different.
Sent from my BatComputer via HAL 9000 and M5
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If you know what you are doing, then you have enough experience to know when it is appropriate to use.
I completely agree with you: it's a useful tool. But like all tools, you have to know how and when to use it. Performance tuning (as you know well) needs more than just "quick code" - it needs a careful look at the whole of what is occurring and frequently a change of algorithm as well as hand-tuning of the code. And if you know what you are doing enough to do that, you understand the effects of your changes. Even Dijkstra said that it has it's place, but that use must be tempered with knowledge of the effects.
Obligatory XKCD reference[^]
The only instant messaging I do involves my middle finger.
English doesn't borrow from other languages.
English follows other languages down dark alleys, knocks them over and goes through their pockets for loose grammar.
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