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Genuine LOL.
I remember the Argus from my time living in Brighton, it was a bit hippy-trippy back then and I see it has not improved from going online.
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They do have some cracking headlines[^] though.
(I spelt Argus wrong, but google knew what I meant)
Some men are born mediocre, some men achieve mediocrity, and some men have mediocrity thrust upon them.
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LOL. Those guys do have a knack for wacky headlines.
<voice type="Ebeneezer Scrooge"> Bah. dumb bugs </voice>
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Hey - when were you in Brighton - I lived there for a few years in the '80s and have fond memories of the chap outside the railway station selling the newspaper, yelling
"AAAAArssse"
at the top of his voice.
Or that's what it sounded like to us after a few pints at the pub!
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_Maxxx_ wrote: "AAAAArssse"
In Brighton, that doesn't surprise me.
I knew it very well back in the day. I'd guess late 70's through to '87 I was there a lot. My Aunt lived there until her death. I was very close to her and so I chose to go to Uni down there. She lived in a home on the front, on Marine Parade and her rooms are now a rather fetching bed-sit, and I was the last family member to see her before she passed away.
I lived in digs up in Moolsecoomb and I thoroughly enjoyed my time there. Studying of course and never going out to the pubs or clubs. Well hardly ever.
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Small world.
I had to check my Resume to make sure, and I lived around Brighton from 1982-1986 (I did spend the latter year or two in Worthing, for my sins)
If you ever frequented the King and Queen (and what Brighton Student didn't) that was me up in the balcony with the pints of cider and those funny looking cigarettes.
Happy Days!
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Did you follow any of the other links?
Drinkers hold guns to each other's heads in Hove pub car park[^]
Love the line: "It is not believed the men were playing Russian Roulette" 
Those who fail to learn history are doomed to repeat it. --- George Santayana (December 16, 1863 – September 26, 1952)
Those who fail to clear history are doomed to explain it. --- OriginalGriff (February 24, 1959 – ∞)
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Yep, I'd ended up on the site after this story about randy turtles[^] was shared elsewhere.
Some men are born mediocre, some men achieve mediocrity, and some men have mediocrity thrust upon them.
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"Brighton Synchronised Swimmers who put on a dry-land showing of their piece The Final Frontier."
...so...they walked about a bit, then? 
Those who fail to learn history are doomed to repeat it. --- George Santayana (December 16, 1863 – September 26, 1952)
Those who fail to clear history are doomed to explain it. --- OriginalGriff (February 24, 1959 – ∞)
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I liked
"We have a zero tolerance approach to drugs, guns and any like behaviour."
Yeah because pubs that have anything other than a zero tolerance to guns are not pubs, they are Saloons.
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*cough*
You've obviously not frequented some of the same pubs I used to then... 
Those who fail to learn history are doomed to repeat it. --- George Santayana (December 16, 1863 – September 26, 1952)
Those who fail to clear history are doomed to explain it. --- OriginalGriff (February 24, 1959 – ∞)
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No I prefer straight pubs. 
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I give you the 11 worst things in the world ever[^].
#11 is particularly awful and don't scroll down that far if you are eating and/or drinking. If you d get to #11, I recommend you start drinking heavily to remove the thought.
Enjoy!
Especially #11!
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I like #7. But I don't understand what #8 is about.
The good thing about pessimism is, that you are always either right or pleasently surprised.
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I've had nights like that shown in #7 - but I always used a screwdriver rather than a knife and the handle prevented that failure. But not the wine redecorating the ceiling... 
Number 8 is easy to fix: There's an app for that[^]
Those who fail to learn history are doomed to repeat it. --- George Santayana (December 16, 1863 – September 26, 1952)
Those who fail to clear history are doomed to explain it. --- OriginalGriff (February 24, 1959 – ∞)
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OriginalGriff wrote: Number 8 is easy to fix: There's an app for that[^]
Number 11 is easy to fix. Lock him in Oscar Pistorius' toilet.
If there is one thing more dangerous than getting between a bear and her cubs it's getting between my wife and her chocolate.
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Because you don't have any sock puppet accounts?
Did you ever see history portrayed as an old man with a wise brow and pulseless heart, waging all things in the balance of reason?
Is not rather the genius of history like an eternal, imploring maiden, full of fire, with a burning heart and flaming soul, humanly warm and humanly beautiful?
--Zachris Topelius
Training a telescope on one’s own belly button will only reveal lint. You like that? You go right on staring at it. I prefer looking at galaxies.
-- Sarah Hoyt
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Smartass! 
Those who fail to learn history are doomed to repeat it. --- George Santayana (December 16, 1863 – September 26, 1952)
Those who fail to clear history are doomed to explain it. --- OriginalGriff (February 24, 1959 – ∞)
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Basically the red triangle-ish thing (looks like part of the manufacturer's sticker) is a plastic widget called a plectrum. It's used to pluck the strings, and pretty hard to remove (I'd assume) if dropped in the sound hole.
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Unstring the guitar and reach in the hole?
Did you ever see history portrayed as an old man with a wise brow and pulseless heart, waging all things in the balance of reason?
Is not rather the genius of history like an eternal, imploring maiden, full of fire, with a burning heart and flaming soul, humanly warm and humanly beautiful?
--Zachris Topelius
Training a telescope on one’s own belly button will only reveal lint. You like that? You go right on staring at it. I prefer looking at galaxies.
-- Sarah Hoyt
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+5 
but first i would try the following pattern:
"Shaken, not stirred" 
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Sounds like that'd work. Never played guitar, do the strings stretch if they are used more than once?
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