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All it needs is Mankini Sean.
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In ancient Israel , it came to pass that a trader by the name of Abraham Com did take unto himself a healthy young wife by the name of Dorothy.
And Dot Com was a homely woman, large of breast, broad of shoulder and long of leg. Indeed, she was often called Amazon Dot Com.
And she said unto Abraham, her husband, "Why dost thou travel so far from town to town, with thy goods when thou canst trade without ever leaving thy tent?"
And Abraham did look at her as though she were several saddle bags short of a camel load, but simply said, "How, dear?"
And Dot replied, "I will place drums in all the towns and drums in between, to send messages saying what you have for sale, and they will reply telling you who hath the best price. The sale can be made on the drums and delivery made by Uriah's Pony Stable (UPS)."
Abraham thought long and decided he would let Dot have her way with the drums.
And the drums rang out and were an immediate success.
Abraham sold all the goods he had at the top price, without ever having to move from his tent.
To prevent neighboring countries from overhearing what the drums were saying, Dot devised a system that only she and the drummers knew. It was known as Must Send Drum Over Sound (MSDOS), and she also developed a language to transmit ideas and pictures - Hebrew To The People (HTTP).
And the young men did take to Dot Com's trading as doth the greedy horsefly take to camel dung. They were called Nomadic Ecclesiastical Rich Damascus Sybarites, or NERDS.
And lo, the land was so feverish with joy at the new riches and the deafening sound of drums that no one noticed that the real riches were going to that enterprising drum dealer, Brother William of Gates, who bought off every drum maker in the land. Indeed he did insist on drums to be made that would work only with Brother Gates' drum heads and drum sticks.
And Dot did say, "Oh, Abraham, what we have started is being taken over by others."
And Abraham looked out over the Bay of Ezekiel , or eBay as it came to be known.
He said, "We need a name that reflects what we are."
And Dot replied, "Young Ambitious Hebrew Owner Operators."
"YAHOO," said Abraham. And because it was Dot's idea, they named it YAHOO Dot Com.
Abraham's cousin, Joshua, being the young Gregarious Energetic Educated Kid (GEEK) that he was, soon started using Dot's drums to locate things around the countryside.
It soon became known as God's Own Official Guide to Locating Everything (GOOGLE).
That is how it all began.
And that's the truth.
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It's only 2.568k in size, deficient by 7.832k
None-the-less: FUNNY!
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It was REALLY funny a couple of years ago when it was first posted
If it's not broken, fix it until it is
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Unlike most of the "jokes" posted here, 'tis the first time I've seen this one.
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And me, well done I think.
We can’t stop here, this is bat country - Hunter S Thompson RIP
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Yes. And that's not even Peter Tork's real hat.
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Eh ?
We can’t stop here, this is bat country - Hunter S Thompson RIP
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Nicely done. Good imagination to couple everything together
Ken
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+5
/ravi
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Hebrew To The People (HTTP).
Ah, that had me laughing! And GOOGLE! Excellent acronym. Very well done, sir!
Marc
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Marc Clifton wrote: Hebrew To The People (HTTP).
Good line, no doubt. But ya really gotta like "several saddle bags short of a camel load".
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Gary Huck wrote: But ya really gotta like "several saddle bags short of a camel load".
Absolutely!
Marc
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I am on my way to the plotter right now so I can hang this above my cube!
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Very
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+1 Cool! Haven't seen anything as good for ages
Banking establishments are more dangerous than standing armies. T.Jefferson
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Mike Hankey wrote: In ancient Israel
There ain't an ancient Israel, it just came into existence in the late 1940s. Did you mean Ancient Palestine?
modified 18-Dec-13 3:22am.
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Say what now? The Judaic tribes were separated into the kingdoms of Judah and Israel from around 930BCE until Tiglath Pileser eradicated the northern kingdom in around 750BCE. That looks pretty ancient to me!
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Some of those names are a bit contrived and I'm sure it's a repost, but still pretty great!
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Amen to that!
Mike Hankey wrote: drums to be made that would work only with Brother Gates' drum heads and drum sticks. But it seems that someone here is confusing the Manger Servicing (MS) Corporation with Abraham's Palestinian Penis Lengthening Enterprise (APPLE).
Anything that is unrelated to elephants is irrelephant Anonymous ----- The problem with quotes on the internet is that you can never tell if they're genuine Winston Churchill, 1944 ----- I'd just like a chance to prove that money can't make me happy. Me, all the time
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<blockquote class="FQ"><div class="FQA">Mike Hankey wrote:</div>And Dot Com was a homely woman, large of breast, broad of shoulder and long of leg. Indeed, she was often called Amazon Dot Com. </blockquote>
Er... "Amazon" refers to a small-breasted woman.
Therefore your post is broken, anything past that point makes no sense, and the joke is unfunny.
Now go wallow in frustration that someone didn't like the text you didn't even write yourself. Or something.
"Whereas smaller computer languages have features designed into them, C++ is unusual in having a whole swathe of functionality discovered, like a tract of 19th century Africa."
-- Verity Stob
http://www.theregister.co.uk/2006/05/05/cplusplus_cli/
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Oh dear. Someone got out the wrong bed this morning! If you want to be pedantic about it 'amazon' actually means with one breast missing and derives from the legend that the tribe of fierce and magnificent women were so dedicated to the art of war that they would excise the right breast in order to prevent interference with their fighting/bow hand. No mention is made of the size of the remaining breast but, in any case, the term was never used literally and has always referred to the overall wow factor which is captured perfectly in the overall description ...'Quote: large of breast, broad of shoulder and long of leg.
A quick survey of Amazons in art (to say nothing of back episodes of Xena) will quickly demonstrate that nobody believes your 'small breasted' theory!!!!
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