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I have been guilty of more of these than I care to admit.
"There are three kinds of lies: lies, damned lies and statistics."
- Benjamin Disraeli
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Kinda slow in here thought it might amuse the hamsters.
A software developer, a hardware engineer and a mid-level manager were on their way to a conference center located near the top of a mountain. After the conference they were driving down the steep mountain road and suddenly the brakes on their car failed.
The car careened almost out of control down the road, bouncing off the crash barriers, until it miraculously ground to a halt scraping along the mountainside. The car's occupants, shaken but unhurt, now had a problem: they were stuck halfway down a mountain in a car with no brakes. What were they to do?
"I know," said the manager, "Let's have a meeting, propose a Vision, formulate a Mission Statement, define some Goals, and by a process of Continuous Improvement find a solution to the Critical Problems, and we can be on our way."No, no," said the hardware engineer, "That will take far too long, and besides, that method has never worked before.
I've got my Swiss Army knife with me, and in no time at all I can strip down the car's braking system, isolate the fault, fix it, and we can be on our way".
"Well," said the software developer, "Before we do anything, I think we should push the car back to the top of the mountain and see if it happens again."
Don't let your mind wander too far.
It's too small to be let out alone.
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The software developer must have been on the Microsoft Windows team.
Get me coffee and no one gets hurt!
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A Microsoft support tech drives past and suggest that they close all the windows and restart the car to see if that fixes the problem.
I'm pretty sure I would not like to live in a world in which I would never be offended.
I am absolutely certain I don't want to live in a world in which you would never be offended.
Freedom doesn't mean the absence of things you don't like.
Dave
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Seems like they would listen but do nothing
Don't let your mind wander too far.
It's too small to be let out alone.
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Mike Hankey wrote: The car careened almost out of control down the road, bouncing off the crash barriers, until it miraculously ground to a halt scraping along the mountainside.
An Apple Maps engineer sitting in the back seat looks around and calmly says: "Sorry about that! According to our latest satellite data there should be a road here."
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Hi Leslie, long time no see.
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And the Agile developer: "Let's create unit tests, set up sprints, and refactor how we take the curve after each sprint. No matter what happens, we'll be able to deliver the car at the bottom of the mountain. Who needs to worry about how many dents it has?"
Latest Article - Code Review - What You Can Learn From a Single Line of Code
Learning to code with python is like learning to swim with those little arm floaties. It gives you undeserved confidence and will eventually drown you. - DangerBunny
Artificial intelligence is the only remedy for natural stupidity. - CDP1802
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As an aside doesn't agile just mean wing it?
Don't let your mind wander too far.
It's too small to be let out alone.
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Mike Hankey wrote: As an aside doesn't agile just mean wing it?
Isn't it grand that the modern software development process has such a cool sounding name?
Latest Article - Code Review - What You Can Learn From a Single Line of Code
Learning to code with python is like learning to swim with those little arm floaties. It gives you undeserved confidence and will eventually drown you. - DangerBunny
Artificial intelligence is the only remedy for natural stupidity. - CDP1802
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Mike Hankey wrote: see if it happens again
Software Zen: delete this;
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... when a new model comes out your car is as slow as a milk float.
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...they would still get the government to subsidize their products.
I really don't get why tax payers need to help one buy an expensive toy...phone or car.
"Go forth into the source" - Neal Morse
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Lifting the hood would void the warranty.
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Something like that existed already. I had such a car.
I have lived with several Zen masters - all of them were cats.
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Tires would be optional and only available from them.
Don't let your mind wander too far.
It's too small to be let out alone.
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But you could choose the color of the tires.
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But only 6 colors
Don't let your mind wander too far.
It's too small to be let out alone.
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And they would be square, with rounded corners.
Bad command or file name. Bad, bad command! Sit! Stay! Staaaay...
AntiTwitter: @DalekDave is now a follower!
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Only 3 sides rounded...we dare to be different!
Don't let your mind wander too far.
It's too small to be let out alone.
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Not square. Triangular. Triangular tires have one less bump per revolution.
Get me coffee and no one gets hurt!
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And they'd be better on stairs.
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It wouldn't include a jack.
modified 20-Jan-18 17:41pm.
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