|
To annoy the Dutch guys at a petrochemical company (that shell remain nameless), I used to Open my e-mails with "Groetjes,"
Then, when they complained (and they always did), I would reply with a (usually Huge!) list of errors they'd made in English.
I wanna be a eunuchs developer! Pass me a bread knife!
|
|
|
|
|
Still, most Dutch speak better English than the average Englishman/American speaks Dutch (although most don't know the difference between British and American English)
Some Dutch even spell better English than some English people (and I don't think that's ever true the other way around)!
|
|
|
|
|
formal: Thanks, with my job title and contact information
semi formal: Thanks, with my contact information
semi or formal additional: Thanks, Joe
first non-formal and you know me: Joe
additional non-formal and you know me: nothing
|
|
|
|
|
Byte me!
I am not a number. I am a ... no, wait!
|
|
|
|
|
What, you don't speak Klingon?
Pfft!
I wanna be a eunuchs developer! Pass me a bread knife!
|
|
|
|
|
|
I usually end with:
"...and if I ever hear from you again, I'm going to hunt you down and personally punch you in the throat."
I don't get a lot of emails...
".45 ACP - because shooting twice is just silly" - JSOP, 2010
- You can never have too much ammo - unless you're swimming, or on fire. - JSOP, 2010
- When you pry the gun from my cold dead hands, be careful - the barrel will be very hot. - JSOP, 2013
|
|
|
|
|
It's not the threat of a punch that discourages emails to you. It's your signature here at CP!
Get me coffee and no one gets hurt!
|
|
|
|
|
SIGNAL LOST
REMOTE DISCONNECT
|
|
|
|
|
There is only one correct way to close a business letter, which has served most learned men of letters since the days of the quill pen:-
I remain your most obedient servant
|
|
|
|
|
Sounds about right to me.[^]
Did you ever see history portrayed as an old man with a wise brow and pulseless heart, waging all things in the balance of reason?
Is not rather the genius of history like an eternal, imploring maiden, full of fire, with a burning heart and flaming soul, humanly warm and humanly beautiful?
--Zachris Topelius
Training a telescope on one’s own belly button will only reveal lint. You like that? You go right on staring at it. I prefer looking at galaxies.
-- Sarah Hoyt
|
|
|
|
|
How disappointing.
I thought your link would be to images of some "professional" women that grace the evenings . . .
"The difference between genius and stupidity is that genius has its limits." - Albert Einstein | "As far as we know, our computer has never had an undetected error." - Weisert | "If you are searching for perfection in others, then you seek disappointment. If you are seek perfection in yourself, then you will find failure." - Balboos HaGadol Mar 2010 |
|
|
|
|
|
Not in the Lounge, Shirley?
Bad command or file name. Bad, bad command! Sit! Stay! Staaaay...
|
|
|
|
|
Er . . . um . . . uh . . .
I was referring to woman who manage the server room on night shift.
Yeah, yeah - that's what I meant.
"The difference between genius and stupidity is that genius has its limits." - Albert Einstein | "As far as we know, our computer has never had an undetected error." - Weisert | "If you are searching for perfection in others, then you seek disappointment. If you are seek perfection in yourself, then you will find failure." - Balboos HaGadol Mar 2010 |
|
|
|
|
|
In one smal business, breastfeeding woman had moved into server room. She cried at HR when IT saw her pumping. She thought their fault for going to their server room.
|
|
|
|
|
The real point seems lost.
Why the elephant must a woman go anywhere special to feed her infant as it was meant to be fed?
If one is religious - then she is doing as G-d willed.
If one is atheistic - then she is doing what is natural.
The loving bond between mother and child at these moments is incredibly beautiful.
Why must she hide herself, even with a mechanical pump? What shameful thing is she hiding? Why would she think she needs to hide herself?
A world where it's more acceptable to seem people with their limbs partially blown off in a hospital than to see a woman giving birth in the same place.
Much of humankind needs their head examined.
"The difference between genius and stupidity is that genius has its limits." - Albert Einstein | "As far as we know, our computer has never had an undetected error." - Weisert | "If you are searching for perfection in others, then you seek disappointment. If you are seek perfection in yourself, then you will find failure." - Balboos HaGadol Mar 2010 |
|
|
|
|
|
W∴ Balboos wrote: If one is religious - then she is doing as G-d willed.
You don't really get this theology lark, do you?
I am not a number. I am a ... no, wait!
|
|
|
|
|
Hopefully they told her that food or drink wasn't allowed in the server room?
Bad command or file name. Bad, bad command! Sit! Stay! Staaaay...
|
|
|
|
|
And that clarity of thought is why you have over 1.5 million CP points and I've not even reached 50 thousand!
"The difference between genius and stupidity is that genius has its limits." - Albert Einstein | "As far as we know, our computer has never had an undetected error." - Weisert | "If you are searching for perfection in others, then you seek disappointment. If you are seek perfection in yourself, then you will find failure." - Balboos HaGadol Mar 2010 |
|
|
|
|
|
Obviously she should have gone to the lunch room/kitchen/whichever facility they have in the company for eating lunch.
|
|
|
|
|
Why did I not think of that?
I must be getting old.
I wanna be a eunuchs developer! Pass me a bread knife!
|
|
|
|
|
As pointed out by Griff, this is the Lounge, not the Troll Pit.[^]
Did you ever see history portrayed as an old man with a wise brow and pulseless heart, waging all things in the balance of reason?
Is not rather the genius of history like an eternal, imploring maiden, full of fire, with a burning heart and flaming soul, humanly warm and humanly beautiful?
--Zachris Topelius
Training a telescope on one’s own belly button will only reveal lint. You like that? You go right on staring at it. I prefer looking at galaxies.
-- Sarah Hoyt
|
|
|
|
|
|
.. isn't in the Burger King[^] handbook, apparently.
I am not a number. I am a ... no, wait!
|
|
|
|
|
I just checked, and it's not in my dictionary either.
Bad command or file name. Bad, bad command! Sit! Stay! Staaaay...
|
|
|
|