|
Just had maple and bacon ice cream. Sounds like it should work. Looks good: chock full of bacon pieces, smells of maple.
Initially tastes good but then it leaves a strange after taste.
I had to have a scoop of salted caramel to cleanse my palate.
|
|
|
|
|
BEN & JERRY : There's no such thing as an unredeemingly bad batch of homemade ice cream.
|
|
|
|
|
R. Giskard Reventlov wrote: Initially tastes good but then it leaves a strange after taste.
That just means you need to eat more of it to avoid the after-taste experience.
Marc
|
|
|
|
|
You mean like avoiding a hangover by staying drunk?
Get me coffee and no one gets hurt!
|
|
|
|
|
Cornelius Henning wrote: You mean like avoiding a hangover by staying drunk?
Precisely!
Marc
|
|
|
|
|
Yeah ... there needs to be a pancake in there somewhere.
|
|
|
|
|
Subject: Nigerian Astronaut Wants To Come Home
Dr. Bakare Tunde
Astronautics Project Manager
National Space Research and Development Agency (NASRDA)
Plot 555
Misau Street
PMB 437
Garki, Abuja, FCT NIGERIA
Dear Mr. Sir,
REQUEST FOR ASSISTANCE-STRICTLY CONFIDENTIAL
I am Dr. Bakare Tunde, the cousin of Nigerian Astronaut, Air Force Major Abacha Tunde. He was the first African in space when he made a secret flight to the Salyut 6 space station in 1979. He was on a later Soviet spaceflight, Soyuz T-16Z to the secret Soviet military space station Salyut 8T in 1989. He was stranded there in 1990 when the Soviet Union was dissolved. His other Soviet crew members returned to earth on the Soyuz T-16Z, but his place was taken up by return cargo. There have been occasional Progrez supply flights to keep him going since that time. He is in good humor, but wants to come home.
In the 14-years since he has been on the station, he has accumulated flight pay and interest amounting to almost $ 15,000,000 American Dollars. This is held in a trust at the Lagos National Savings and Trust Association. If we can obtain access to this money, we can place a down payment with the Russian Space Authorities for a Soyuz return flight to bring him back to Earth. I am told this will cost $ 3,000,000 American Dollars. In order to access the his trust fund we need your assistance.
Consequently, my colleagues and I are willing to transfer the total amount to your account or subsequent disbursement, since we as civil servants are prohibited by the Code of Conduct Bureau (Civil Service Laws) from opening and/ or operating foreign accounts in our names.
Needless to say, the trust reposed on you at this juncture is enormous. In return, we have agreed to offer you 20 percent of the transferred sum, while 10 percent shall be set aside for incidental expenses (internal and external) between the parties in the course of the transaction. You will be mandated to remit the balance 70 percent to other accounts in due course.
Kindly expedite action as we are behind schedule to enable us include downpayment in this financial quarter.
Please acknowledge the receipt of this message via my direct number 234 (0) 9-234-2220 only.
Yours Sincerely, Dr. Bakare Tunde
Astronautics Project Manager
tip@nasrda.gov.ng
http://www.nasrda.gov.ng/
Hey, at least it seems like a new idea 😂
Edit/PS: Why wasn't this one caught in the filter, @chris-maunder ?
|
|
|
|
|
Ah the nigerians are applying a little imagination if not common sense. I applaud their innovation into ever more fanciful scenarios.
Never underestimate the power of human stupidity
RAH
|
|
|
|
|
Look like they're moving into the 21st century.
|
|
|
|
|
I wish there was away we could connect Dr. Tunde with Matt Damon. Those two could surely solve this.
|
|
|
|
|
After 15 years of weightlessness, re-entry will break every bone in his body!
Get me coffee and no one gets hurt!
|
|
|
|
|
|
Cornelius Henning wrote: will break every bone in his body
So will I if he tries to steal all my money!
|
|
|
|
|
you mean 25 right? 1990 + 15 years only makes 2005. lol
|
|
|
|
|
MATH WON'T GET HIM HOME! ONLY MONEY!
|
|
|
|
|
And a very big home indeed. Probably a castle in his country. He may need it when his fellow countrymen come after him and his money.
|
|
|
|
|
I don't care who you are that's funny!
New version: WinHeist Version 2.2.2 Beta tomorrow (noun): a mystical land where 99% of all human productivity, motivation and achievement is stored.
|
|
|
|
|
Brilliant!
You have just been Sharapova'd.
|
|
|
|
|
You should call and tell them this:
Quote: Hi, this is Steven Spielberg. I am inspired by this and would like to make a movie so the whole World knows about this forgotten hero. I am ready to pay 50M USD for the story. However, you need to first send me 1M USD as security. This is to ensure you will not sell the rights to anyone else.
"You'd have to be a floating database guru clad in a white toga and ghandi level of sereneness to fix this goddamn clusterfuck.", BruceN[ ^]
|
|
|
|
|
I think you just won the internet today.
|
|
|
|
|
Bring the boy back home!
|
|
|
|
|
I'd rather pay to lose them ALL in space...
Anything that is unrelated to elephants is irrelephant Anonymous
- The problem with quotes on the internet is that you can never tell if they're genuine Winston Churchill, 1944
- I'd just like a chance to prove that money can't make me happy. Me, all the time
|
|
|
|
|
Can you please provide your bank details so I can support you? Of course my support would cost you in advance, but I'll repay 110%.
|
|
|
|
|
Sure, no problem. But it's sensitive information, so if you don't mind, I'll have my special courier[^] deliver it to you. Now, what was your address again????
Anything that is unrelated to elephants is irrelephant Anonymous
- The problem with quotes on the internet is that you can never tell if they're genuine Winston Churchill, 1944
- I'd just like a chance to prove that money can't make me happy. Me, all the time
|
|
|
|
|
Here you go: 9 Northumberland Ave, London WC2N 5BX
|
|
|
|