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Thanks Mike.
I did something similar. I took three years off and built a farm in the country side. It was a very rewarding experience and I also felt a lot better, so obviously this is what I should continue doing. But I have no passion for it as I have with software development. It's a tough choice. Farming makes me healthy but bored, programming makes me unhealthy but stimulated.
Bjorn
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I completely understand, it gets in your blood. I will never quite programming but am doing it for myself now, no deadlines, no bosses.
Good luck to ya!
As I grow older I've found that pleasing everyone is impossible but pissing everyone off is a piece of cake.
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bjoernen wrote: Farming makes me healthy but bored, programming makes me unhealthy but stimulated.
This is exactly what I'm going through right now. Not with farming, but general physical activity as well. It's a tough paradox to be intelligent, we want mental stimulation, but we can't reach our full intellectual height without taking care of the body as well since that's what helps give us the intelligence in the first place.
Jeremy Falcon
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That's my dream. Have my own farm, work with soil out there; have my office inside and work in it other times. I may be wrong but I expect to have enough free time from both of them to satisfy the other.
You already have the experience, so what do you think? Would that be an alternative for you or am I dreaming too much?
"The primary trait of a good programmer is laziness. Nobody works harder to do nothing than a good programmer." - MehGerbil
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It depends on how practical of a person you are. Farming is a lot less glamorous than most people think. Its a lot about digging ditches and being out in the rain. And it is time consuming, so I'm not sure if you can manage software development at the same time. Plus if you want to do it commercially you will be competing with lots of people who don't have a choice but be farmers, and they usually settle for less pay. If I were you I would keep my job in the software business, and buy a cottage in the country side, and do a little gardening in the weekends.
Bjorn
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That's a tough question and no easy answer.
Some things I noticed about myself:
Getting tired very quickly turned out to be due to eye strain - glasses are helping with that problem.
Cloudy mind - I discovered a while back that drinking soy smoothies was affecting my mental clarity. That led to some other interesting self-diagnosis such as paying attention to pollen counts. My mood and clarity is also highly affected by B vitamins. It's amazing how much better I feel with some B vitamin supplements. BTW, B vitamin deficiency is definitely linked to nerve damage / issues.
Psychologically, I find it really helpful to step back from my work and ask myself what is rewarding about it and what is making me miserable. A lot of times, the misery part can actually be improved by simply improving a process. I also have at least one interesting personal side project that keeps my mind and soul happy, especially when faced with the understandable occurrences of drudge work. For misery that can't be improved, I try to work with it in healthy ways -- prioritize it, confront it, deal with it first. Funny thing is, it always seems more miserable than it actually is: my mind creates a lot more suffering just thinking about doing some drudge work than the drudge work actually warrants.
I have a cat. Provides a lot of entertainment and fun (so does the gf, but not in the same way as the cat.)
That's my 2c.
Marc
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Marc Clifton wrote: I also have at least one interesting personal side project that keeps my mind and soul happy Same here. I've got two roles at work: principal UI developer on our products, and the DSJB: Departmental Sh*t-Job Boy. My side project, however, is an in-house tracing tool we use. I keep a list of new features, bug fixes, and so on for it. Whenever I need a break from the day-to-day grind, I work on the tracing tool a bit.Marc Clifton wrote: I have a cat. Provides a lot of entertainment and fun (so does the gf, but not in the same way as the cat.) I will forego the obvious and puerile pun for this observation: cats are .
Software Zen: delete this;
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Gary R. Wheeler wrote: Whenever I need a break from the day-to-day grind, I work on the tracing tool a bit
Ah so that is what my code generator is, a side project for when I need a break from drudgery.
Never underestimate the power of human stupidity
RAH
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Thanks Marc,
I've experimented with staying away from different foods, but it doesn't seem to matter. I wish there was a safe drug that just zapped away the metal clouds. I rarely ever drink alcohol by the way, because I hate how it makes the mental clouds even thicker. Uppers like caffeine doesn't help either, except cocaine, but that would ruin my health pretty quickly.
It's very clear that I should get out of software development, but I just don't know of anything that is as exciting.
Bjorn
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Hi Bjorn,
If you have mental cloudiness and found that cocaine helped then you might want to check out adrenal fatigue and how to fix it.
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I'm very suspicious of stuff that's not accepted by science, and adrenal fatigue one of those things. But thanks for the concern.
Bjorn
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Marc Clifton wrote: Cloudy mind - I discovered a while back that drinking soy smoothies was affecting my mental clarity.
Not having a clean source of *healthy* carbs will do that. That's why the b vitamins help, so will some starchy veggies like carrots and potatoes. Just don't overdo it.
Also, one of the things that really helped me was to give up caffeine. That sh*t is pure evil.
Jeremy Falcon
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Stop people pleasing and have boundaries. At the end of the day you career suffers more from burnouts than it does from not having them if it makes any sense.
We are our own worst enemies at the end of the day. The difference between you (having burnouts) and the next person (not having burnouts) is you.
"Program testing can be used to show the presence of bugs, but never to show their absence."
<< please vote!! >>
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bjoernen wrote: I'm curious to learn how others dealt with it Seriously? Religion.
Divine healing + omnipotent being caring for your future = no stress
It's free, but it's not cheap.
Still, there are amusing moments:
"You missed the deadline!"
"God is in control."
"The client's not happy."
"Well, that's because he's not a Christian. Christians rejoice in trials."
People at work aren't sure how to treat me, since I have no stress even if overloaded, or if urgent problems arise.
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I do believe you. I would be religious if I could, and probably happier, but my brain isn't wired that way.
Bjorn
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Any kind of mental effort makes me tired very quickly, and my mind is constantly "cloudy" without ability to think very clearly
I get this a lot, I thought it was just part of not being young any more.
It sounds like you need some way of knowing when to stop, either a partner who will enforce 'no more than X hours/day' or some kind of deliberate routine whereby you stop at 5pm and don't touch 'work' again that day, even if you 'want' to carry on.
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The first time I burned out I started my own business as a fishing guide.
About five years afterwards, money starting getting tight, so I took what I thought was going to be a temporary gig writing software again. I loved this temporary gig so much that I became the team lead - and they pay me pretty good too.
Perhaps, it's just a change of scenery and perspective you need. It worked wonders for me.
"I am rarely happier than when spending entire day programming my computer to perform automatically a task that it would otherwise take me a good ten seconds to do by hand."
- Douglas Adams
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After 30+ years in software development, I can honestly say, the day you retire, and become a greeter at Walmart, is when you recover from burnout!
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Hi Bjorn,
Some suggestions of things to try:
1. Remove Nutrasweet from your diet. Many people are allergic but don't realize it. Maybe 12%+. I'm highly allergic to it. Gives me severe headaches. It is chemically similar to rattlesnake venom.
2. Remove all artificial sweetners and additives from your diet. They often cause all sorts of weird problems.
3. Try rotating different food groups into and out of your diet each week. I have a theory that some people have difficulty metabolizing certain proteins, amino acids, etc. and suspect that because they are not properly metabolized they then act to in effect toxify a person's metabolism.
4. Check for some sleeper type infections/problems such as Lyme disease which is often misdiagnosed.
5. Have a heavy metal and toxic compound screen. You might have been exposed to some in the past. And it can take many years before the symptoms manifest.
6. Check for severe sleep apnea. Do you wake up in the middle of the night for no apparent reason? Do you have trouble sleeping? Your biological clock may also be out of wack with the normal day-night cycle on this planet.
7. Pushing your body beyond it's limits will cause it to complain more and more. Determine where you need to be to stay within your body's limitations and develop a daily/weekly schedule to remain in that zone.
8. Learn to meditate. Helps the body with stress. Almost any method is good to start. Zen is one of the best but is also the hardest. But well worth it.
9. How much time do you spend in Nature? The body came from Nature and needs regular communing with it.
10. Experiment and determine what activities cause more symptoms (may be days later) or less symptoms. Then avoid those that cause and do more of those that nurture.
I'm not sure that you have burnout. Sounds more like your body is over stressed and thus complaining. And needs to heal. Burnout typically occurs during prolonged high stress, low sleep, bad diet, no exercise, no Nature periods when the body becomes exhausted and the adrenal glands and other hormones become exhausted. Best recovery procedures are to withdraw from the combat situation and rest and recover. If you find that a vacation really helps then this is highly likely that it's burnout/over stress.
Best wishes,
- Grant
PS: If you find that you can concentrate on certain things without headache and symptoms but not on some things like programming then it's probably psychological burnout where you're really sick and tired of the same old thing and need some changes in what you do. You can take some classes that interest you and that will hopefully lead you to something better. Good luck.
- Cary Grant Anderson
www.CaryGrantAnderson.com
www.CGrantAnderson.com
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Thanks Grant,
Those are all good suggestions and I have tried most of them. The funny thing is that I look about 10 years younger than I am from taking good care of myself so long, but my brain seems totally messed up beyond repair.
Bjorn
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I showed your post to my wife who instantly said - "Thyroid".
My wife has the symptoms of mind being cloudy, inability to think clearly and inability to exert mental effort as well.
In her case she doesn't have a thyroid gland (cancer) and has to rely on medication.
These symptoms appear when the thyroid is too low.
Perhaps you need to have a thyroid test.
Good luck.
Murray
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Thanks Murray,
Yea I did, and my thyroid is fully functional.
Bjorn
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We routinely solve problems that others don't even know exist. We have performed a miracle but we are perceived as having simply carried out a task. This leads to lack of appreciation that we try to rectify by performing yet more miracles. We become quite good and seek to prove this by taking on something truly large and complex. We drive ourselves into it on the basis that we can see that it can be done and how. We then work relentlessly to realise our vision and we are in trouble. We are now constantly compensating for complexity that we didn't anticipate by trying to get the extra work done unseen. We shoulder this extra burden because we want to see our vision realised and prove that it will work. While you are immersed in this it quite likely that some of your colleagues may be moving against you. They may resent your intention to produce a spectacular miracle that could overshadow their work or the freedom you may have been given to burn yourself out at home and you haven't been devoting much time to office politics recently.
Our enthusiasm combined with a wish to please and be appreciated get us into trouble. You have to let enthusiasm flow when it is there but we should be very measured about our wish to please and be appreciated.
Ideally I like an intense project of about 4 months and then 8 months rest. That way, each project is fresh and new.
It is important to understand that skills don't rust. You can take a long break and they will still be there but you may find that you now make more mature use of them.
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I can totally relate to this John. Before my second burnout I was in a high profile project, and one of the key people there. As I hit the wall, people had a hard time believing me, as if I was making this up. "You left the project at crunch time, that's not fair to the team". Some people to this day still think I was traitor. I was even fired for this, although they didn't explicitly say it, because it would have been illegal.
"We couldn't see that your had any problems". "It was not showing on you, you looked just normal". Funny how people suddenly become expert psychologists when something like this happens, and disregard my early warnings as laziness. I have never met a person who works harder than me (and that's of course part of the problem).
The last day I worked, I couldn't even put letters together to form words anymore. I would see b, o, o and k, but could not compute that it said "book". Then followed nine months of rehabilitation before I was somewhat ok again. No need to feel sorry for me personally, I'm happy right now. But I wish that other people afflicted with this are taken seriously.
Bjorn
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Hi Bjorn, thanks for your reply.
I think that what all enthusiastic programmers must realise is that you have to plan your own rehabilitation and do it your own way. It is very difficult to do this as an employee because superhuman efforts are not recognised (are even resented) and daily drudge is required relentlessly.
The only time I have felt decently paid and decently treated is on short term contracts of 3 to 4 months with a specific goal for which I have taken personal responsibility. The saying of contractors is “Take the money and run” but it is more like “Perform the miracle and run” and that suits me. Workplace environments are typically so dysfunctional that any success simply breeds suspicion and resentment. I have found that the certainty that my stay is not permanent leaves everyone concerned a lot more comfortable.
I have just finished 8 years of permanent employment in Spain. Despite some very successful projects it finished badly. I think they were becoming uncomfortable about the inevitability of having to give me credit for what I had done. Now it is time for my rehabilitation and I am looking forward to it.
I do think that regular office bound employment is no place for a good creative programmer.
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