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bartender joke of the day
A man walks into a bar and orders a shot, then he looks into his shirt pocket and orders another one. After he finishes, he looks into his pocket again and orders another shot.
The bartender is curious and asks the man why he looks into his pocket before ordering each shot.
The man replies, “I have a picture of my wife in my pocket, and when she starts to look good, I go home.”
The report of my death was an exaggeration - Mark Twain
Simply Elegant Designs JimmyRopes Designs
I'm on-line therefore I am.
JimmyRopes
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Paddy had long heard the stories of an amazing family tradition.
It seems that his father, grandfather and great-grandfather had all been able to walk on water on their 18th birthday.
On that special day, they'd each walked across the lake to the pub on the far side for their first legal drink.
So when Paddy's 18th birthday came around, he and his pal Mick took a boat out to the middle of the lake, Paddy, stepped out of the boat .... and nearly drowned!
Mick just barely managed to pull him to safety.
Furious and confused, Paddy went to see his grandmother.
"Grandma", he asked, "Tis me 18th birthday, so why can't I walk across the lake like me father, his father and his father before him?"
Granny looked deeply into Paddy's troubled eyes and said, "Because ye father, ye grandfather and ye great-grandfather were all born in December when the lake is frozen, and ye were born in August, ya idiot!"
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Only problem is that the legal drinking age hasn't always been 18, so it's hard to see how 18 years applied to his grandfather and great-grandfather. Otherwise it's funny
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CarefulCoder wrote: Only problem is that the legal drinking age hasn't always been 18, so it's hard to see how 18 years applied to his grandfather and great-grandfather.
It's a joke!
The report of my death was an exaggeration - Mark Twain
Simply Elegant Designs JimmyRopes Designs
I'm on-line therefore I am.
JimmyRopes
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/ravi
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Thick Irish jokes, still?
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So... You think there will be a sequel to this: Avalanche Sharks[^]?
Those who fail to learn history are doomed to repeat it. --- George Santayana (December 16, 1863 – September 26, 1952)
Those who fail to clear history are doomed to explain it. --- OriginalGriff (February 24, 1959 – ∞)
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OriginalGriff wrote: So... You think there will be a sequel to this: Avalanche Sharks
I just watched the trailer. New heights of cheesiness.
Sometimes the true reward for completing a task is not the money, but instead the satisfaction of a job well done. But it's usually the money.
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d@nish wrote: Sharknado 2
There had to be a following for Sharknado if they are coming out with Sharknado 2.
The report of my death was an exaggeration - Mark Twain
Simply Elegant Designs JimmyRopes Designs
I'm on-line therefore I am.
JimmyRopes
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To be honest, I have not seen the first one. I know Tara Reid is in it and I would like to look at her. But not at price of my sanity.
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d@nish wrote: I know Tara Reid is in it and I would like to look at her. But not at price of my sanity.
Even if she was naked?
The report of my death was an exaggeration - Mark Twain
Simply Elegant Designs JimmyRopes Designs
I'm on-line therefore I am.
JimmyRopes
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Yes. Even if she was naked or anyone for that matter.
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A cannibal entered the meat market to buy something nice for dinner. The owner greeted him and told him to look around. The cannibal began to inspect the meat case and noticed the market specialized in brain.
Upon further inspection he noticed a marked disparity between the costs of brain meats. A carpenter's brain sold for $1.50 per pound. A plumber's brain sold for $2.25 per pound. He noticed with alarm that a politician's brain was priced at $375.00 a pound. With not a little curiosity he asked the owner about the huge difference in price between the similar meats.
The owner responded, "Do you realize how many politicians it takes to get a pound of brains?"
/ravi
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I first heard it as "... They've never been used!"
Those who fail to learn history are doomed to repeat it. --- George Santayana (December 16, 1863 – September 26, 1952)
Those who fail to clear history are doomed to explain it. --- OriginalGriff (February 24, 1959 – ∞)
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Has anyone read Books written by Him?
Was it good? I am considering purchasing one of his books, and am looking for feedback.
Thank You.
David
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Yes, and his books are very good. Mind you, I am biased because he's a friend of mine.
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Always support your friends.
David
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Hello everyone
I have already installed WindowsAndroid on my laptop.
The problem is that I do not know how to install apk files using this application.
I have googled about this but no success.
Is here anyone that can help me?
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This is the wrong forum for Android questions, but you might want to look here[^]
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Meysam Tolouee wrote: I have already installed WindowsAndroid on my laptop. Do you mean BlueStacks?
/ravi
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Not at all.
I mean "WindowsAndroid".
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Website? All I found were links to sites that host the app.
/ravi
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