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Over[^] the[^] last[^] two[^] weeks[^] SF/Fantasy author Ryk Spoor has had a panel of his assorted villains discussing the Evil Overlord List. I've included a few excerpts below, (and if I'd realized how long this post was going to get probably would've posted each part here as they came out. )
If you haven't read any of Ryk's books you should. If you're a science fiction fan I'd suggest starting with Boundary[^]. General fantasy readers should check out Pheonix Rising[^]. Lovers of vampires that only sparkle when on fire unfortunately will have to either hunt down a copy of the out of print Digital Knight[^] or wait about a year until it's rereleased in an expanded form as Paradigms Lost.
Quote:
6. I will not gloat over my enemies’ predicament before killing them.
Virigar: You know, this list is starting to take the fun out of being an Evil Overlord. It’s at least half the POINT of finally catching your enemy to take that shining moment to gloat — and of course give him the chance to put that last, desperate plan into action.
Dark Wanderer: Oh, far from it; I am all too aware of the existence of Good as a tangible force. In any case, whether I gloat would depend on how amusing it would be for ME. I rather agree with Virigar. There’s an element of style here.
Endgame: Virigar, Wanderer, you are entirely correct. It is not sufficient to merely win. One has to win properly. Your enemies must be forced to recognized to realize their failure, to appreciate and despair at your own genius! They must be broken! They must kneel! And only then do you grant them the death they so richly deserve!
Thornfalcon: I certainly applaud the spirit, if not the details, not being quite as… what was the term I heard once… Nhilistic, that is it… as you. The dramatic speech, the chance to reveal your plan, the desperate attempts to escape – and, yes, even that risk that you’re perhaps not quite as good as you thought – this is part of the fun of it all.
Dark Wanderer: Ahh, yes, that’s what I was trying to think of! All this talk of being so practical that you stop being a grand-scale villain is just plain “Bad Form”. From the movie “Hook”.
25. No matter how well it would perform, I will never construct any sort of machinery which is completely indestructible except for one small and virtually inaccessible vulnerable spot.
Virigar (dryly): Oh, you’d prefer it be completely indestructible except for many large and easily targeted spots?
Master Wieran: I think they refer to devices as are found in poorly-thought-out tales which provide some critical weakness to an otherwise invincible foe.
Maria-Susanna: Say, like silver bullets for a werewolf?
Virigar: Your soul looks absolutely delicious, you know.
29. I will dress in bright and cheery colors, and so throw my enemies into confusion.
Virigar: Does rather make it difficult to maintain the “Dark Lord” title, though.
Dark Wanderer: Yes, and “the Pink Lord of Shininess” doesn’t quite have the same impact.
50. My main computers will have their own special operating system that will be completely incompatible with standard IBM and Macintosh powerbooks.
Virigar: Yet another one far too specific to be applicable.
Dark Wanderer: You’re right, big V, too specific, and not even accurate. Let’s try this reformulation which is much closer to the ACTUAL problem and one more generally applicable: “I will make sure that all equipment superior to that of my enemies is carefully accounted for. In the event that some falls into the enemy’s hands, I will either (A) retrieve it, (B) destroy it, or, if both of the latter are impossible, (C) modify my plans to assume that they will be able to understand and incorporate that technology into their own plans. I WILL NOT PERMIT A SHIP WHICH HAS BEEN IN ENEMY HANDS FOR 40 YEARS TO DOCK WITH MY MOTHERSHIP!”
90. After I captures the hero’s superweapon, I will not immediately disband my legions and relax my guard because I believe whoever holds the weapon is unstoppable. After all, the hero held the weapon and I took it from him.
Virigar: Indeed. We are all agreed on this?
Dark Wanderer: (after a glance around the table) Yep. Unless the reason is that you WILL use the superweapon, and HE wouldn’t.
Thornfalcon: Even so, why would I disband my Legions? Unless I feel like using my unstoppable superweapon to solve minor disputes in administration, I’ll have a great use for an extensive force of persons to police my realm.
94. If I decide to hold a double execution of the hero and an underling who failed or betrayed me, I will see to it that the hero is scheduled to go first.
Virigar: Double execution? Double the executioners, then. Kill them both at the same time.
Master Wieran: I do not DO such wasteful demonstrations. I will disassemble them for use in the organ vats.
Maria-Susanna: EEEeeeeew!
Dark Wanderer: Hmm, wouldn’t have thought you so squeamish. I agree with Big V; kill both at once.
Thornfalcon: Ahhh, now, the problem is *spectacle*. Public executions are entertainment, and you’re now insisting on cutting it in half.
Endgame: And they’re also dramatic emphasis of your will and power. Cut that in half, cut the effect in half.
Amanita: Ohhh, I love a good execution! Don’t waste them!
Did you ever see history portrayed as an old man with a wise brow and pulseless heart, waging all things in the balance of reason?
Is not rather the genius of history like an eternal, imploring maiden, full of fire, with a burning heart and flaming soul, humanly warm and humanly beautiful?
--Zachris Topelius
Training a telescope on one’s own belly button will only reveal lint. You like that? You go right on staring at it. I prefer looking at galaxies.
-- Sarah Hoyt
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the places my net nanny restrict, rather annoying!
Can't stand fantasy the only book of his I have on the phone is Grand Central Arena, I will be chasing the sequel shortly.
On another note do/can you share your ebook library (I have no compunction in breaking the DRM) with family etc.
Never underestimate the power of human stupidity
RAH
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Mycroft Holmes wrote: Can't stand fantasy the only book of his I have on the phone is Grand Central Arena, I will be chasing the sequel shortly.
De gustibus non est disputandum. That's the only one of his published books I've never been able to finish; my WSOD collapsed partway through the first draft and the 'what happened last time' prologue of Spheres of Influence more or less confirmed that it wasn't the sort of story I'd normally enjoy. Spheres hit #45 on Bookscan's national all format SF list though; so clearly a lot of people do agree with you.
Mycroft Holmes wrote: On another note do/can you share your ebook library (I have no compunction in breaking the DRM) with family etc.
AFAIK Baen itself doesn't. If you're buying from Amazon/etc instead of Baen's outlet[^], you'd need to read the terms of service to know. DRM isn't an issue though; while Baen did have to make some accommodations to the beast that caused fan grumbling Baen ebooks (from any source) are as DRM free as they were when Jim Baen started selling them in 1999.
Did you ever see history portrayed as an old man with a wise brow and pulseless heart, waging all things in the balance of reason?
Is not rather the genius of history like an eternal, imploring maiden, full of fire, with a burning heart and flaming soul, humanly warm and humanly beautiful?
--Zachris Topelius
Training a telescope on one’s own belly button will only reveal lint. You like that? You go right on staring at it. I prefer looking at galaxies.
-- Sarah Hoyt
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Most of my library comes from Baen but recently I felt I needed a wider selection of authors and so ended up at eBook.com. currently enjoying Gary Gibson's Shoal series.
The really pleasant things was finding some of the more interesting add ins to Calibre, Imagine having to register all my reading devices with Adobe what bullshit. I really hope the publishers come up with a workable structure so everyone get their fair cut.
Never underestimate the power of human stupidity
RAH
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There can be only one evil overlord and its not a creation of Ryk Spoor but a member of our CP community.
Microsoft ... the only place where VARIANT_TRUE != true
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Thank you, thank you. It's nice to be recognised...
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Marco Bertschi wrote: Psst... HeShe talks about our QA-newbie-slammer[^] Nope. He has no power here
Microsoft ... the only place where VARIANT_TRUE != true
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Pssst! He's not an overlord. Just evil.
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Our great overlord is always right !
Microsoft ... the only place where VARIANT_TRUE != true
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These tarted up imitators are not worth a jot or a tittle of Chthulu's spittle.
"What Turing gave us for the first time (and without Turing you just couldn't do any of this) is he gave us a way of thinking about and taking seriously and thinking in a disciplined way about phenomena that have, as I like to say, trillions of moving parts.
Until the late 20th century, nobody knew how to take seriously a machine with a trillion moving parts. It's just mind-boggling." Daniel C. Dennett
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Virigar snacks on gods who get in his way. He'd find old squid lips nothing more than a nice platter of shushi.
Did you ever see history portrayed as an old man with a wise brow and pulseless heart, waging all things in the balance of reason?
Is not rather the genius of history like an eternal, imploring maiden, full of fire, with a burning heart and flaming soul, humanly warm and humanly beautiful?
--Zachris Topelius
Training a telescope on one’s own belly button will only reveal lint. You like that? You go right on staring at it. I prefer looking at galaxies.
-- Sarah Hoyt
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linky[^]
Quote: An Australian MP obsessed with Doctor Who has brought a Dalek to parliament and moved a motion urging the BBC to film the show in Australia.
MVVM # - I did it My Way
___________________________________________
Man, you're a god. - walterhevedeich 26/05/2011
.\\axxx
(That's an 'M')
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With Skippy as his sidekick.
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Obscurum per obscurius.
Ad astra per alas porci.
Quidquid latine dictum sit, altum videtur .
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"What is it, Skip?"
"tchut tchut, tchutt"
"The cybermen are in teh opera house and Riversong is in trouble?"
MVVM # - I did it My Way
___________________________________________
Man, you're a god. - walterhevedeich 26/05/2011
.\\axxx
(That's an 'M')
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Dr. : We'll have to grow this bacteria to see what it is.
Companion : But we're in Australia.
Dr. : You're right, there's no culture here.
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While in general agreement, I feel I must point out there is a suburb close to me called Petrie, which certainly has culture - look at this from Wikipaedea
Quote: Large industries in Petrie include Boral Quarries and Amcor Paper Mill (in February 2013 Amcor announced the closure, in September, of the mill [6]).
MVVM # - I did it My Way
___________________________________________
Man, you're a god. - walterhevedeich 26/05/2011
.\\axxx
(That's an 'M')
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I thought you buggered off up the coast...
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Indeedy do I did - but I am currently sitting in sunny (?) Dayboro slaving over a hot keyboard and wishing to god (sorry, soapbox) that I could get a frigging job up t'coast !
If you know of anything... the way today has been going I'd take a job in MacDoodles!
MVVM # - I did it My Way
___________________________________________
Man, you're a god. - walterhevedeich 26/05/2011
.\\axxx
(That's an 'M')
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Ah Dayboro... lovely area. We looked at several larger properties up at Ocean View and Mt Mee before buying where we are now...
I know someone looking for a labourer at Strathpine tomorrow - you got a construction blue/white card?
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_Damian S_ wrote: you got a construction blue/white card?
Nah, mate. I'm a big girls blouse - I own two tools - one is called a screwdriver and the other a hammer, but I'm blowed if I can remember which is which.
I get confused if someone shows me two spades and asks me to take my pick.
The only reason I go to Bunnings is for the sausage sizzle
I need to work in order to pay people to do all those little jobs that really should be easy but about which I show remarkable incompetence.
(Actually I do have a blue card for working with kids due to my teaching, but I'm not sure that's the sort of blue card you were referring to)
MVVM # - I did it My Way
___________________________________________
Man, you're a god. - walterhevedeich 26/05/2011
.\\axxx
(That's an 'M')
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400 pound HIGH SCHOOL STUDENT[^]. I imagine the football coach for that high school is happy this year.
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TTFN - Kent
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How could he play football?
Unless you wedgedhim in goal.
Oh, you mean American football don't you.
In which case yeah, he could amble his way to the touchline.
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Obscurum per obscurius.
Ad astra per alas porci.
Quidquid latine dictum sit, altum videtur .
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Not my fault you guys call it wrong. It's not like you play that game with just (mostly) your feet or anything.
Amble is about right. He could fall forward and take most of the opposing team with him.
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TTFN - Kent
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Kent Sharkey wrote: He could fall forward and take most of the opposing team with him.
Splat!
Getting information off the Internet is like taking a drink from a fire hydrant.
- Mitchell Kapor
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