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Going ever further away from the orignal subject: If you enjoy what people think up at the subway, you should listen to Tom Lehrer - The Subway Song - YouTube[^]
(You are probably too young to remember Tom Lehrer  . In the 1960s he was a comedian, singing hillarious, and often very political songs, sometimes grotesque, but alwas funny. And his spoken introductions doubled the value of the songs. If you like this kind of humour, search for Tom Lehrer on YouTube.)
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D4rkTrick wrote: The thread creator
That's me. 
I am not the one who knocks. I never knock.
In fact, I hate knocking.
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... but for the first time they showed an ad at the top of the page that I might be interested in. Boxer shorts. You can't have enough of those. But how did the server know that? I never did any such search.
I am endeavoring, ma'am, to construct a mnemonic memory circuit using stone knives and bearskins.
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Predictive advertising: they know what you will be searching for soon.
Bad command or file name. Bad, bad command! Sit! Stay! Staaaay...
AntiTwitter: @DalekDave is now a follower!
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Then why do I have to wait for my Illudium Q-36 Explosive Space Modulator?
I am endeavoring, ma'am, to construct a mnemonic memory circuit using stone knives and bearskins.
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Because they haven't written the ad yet: the marketing department are only on their third martini, and are waiting for the barbeque to heat up ready to cook the unicorn burgers first.
Bad command or file name. Bad, bad command! Sit! Stay! Staaaay...
AntiTwitter: @DalekDave is now a follower!
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unicorned beef?
I am endeavoring, ma'am, to construct a mnemonic memory circuit using stone knives and bearskins.
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Was the horn not the part they were after? And what did they sell as unicorn horns? A whale's tooth.[^]
I think they also had unicorn burgers in the Dilbert cartoons.
I am endeavoring, ma'am, to construct a mnemonic memory circuit using stone knives and bearskins.
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Um ... that was a link to unicorn burgers in the Dilbert cartoons ... 
Bad command or file name. Bad, bad command! Sit! Stay! Staaaay...
AntiTwitter: @DalekDave is now a follower!
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No, the video cartoons. You know, at least 24 frames per second. In color. With sound.
I am endeavoring, ma'am, to construct a mnemonic memory circuit using stone knives and bearskins.
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OH! You mean the moving pictures? With all the latest actor chappies, like Buster Keaton, and Oliver Hardy in!
We don't get many of those here, you know - the celluloid doesn't travel well.
Bad command or file name. Bad, bad command! Sit! Stay! Staaaay...
AntiTwitter: @DalekDave is now a follower!
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Even scarier, I never see an ad for underwear.
How does the server know that? 
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They are easily distracted and never do what they are supposed to:
Wizard of Id[^]
I am endeavoring, ma'am, to construct a mnemonic memory circuit using stone knives and bearskins.
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Are you trying to say that I get distracted easily? Because I'll have you know oooh! Shiny!
Bad command or file name. Bad, bad command! Sit! Stay! Staaaay...
AntiTwitter: @DalekDave is now a follower!
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I never get distracted, I was always looking at the shiny.
Format Success.
Welcome to your new signa&*(gD@@@ ![Beer | [beer]](https://www.codeproject.com/script/Forums/Images/beer.gif) @@@@@@*@x@@
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...when you realize, that a new feature has been added to the application while you were on vacation and it ruined half of the existing features...
(add to it, that you had a nice meeting about that feature and you mentioned 3 pitfalls of the implementation - of them 2 weren't resolved)
Skipper: We'll fix it.
Alex: Fix it? How you gonna fix this?
Skipper: Grit, spit and a whole lotta duct tape.
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The moral of this story is "vacations are dangerous".
Bad command or file name. Bad, bad command! Sit! Stay! Staaaay...
AntiTwitter: @DalekDave is now a follower!
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No! 'Vacations are short'! I should get back AFTER the errors are handled...
Skipper: We'll fix it.
Alex: Fix it? How you gonna fix this?
Skipper: Grit, spit and a whole lotta duct tape.
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I once had something similar happen. I had to get code done by a certain date.
I completed it with associated tests. All good.
I released it to the team for deployment.
They sat on it due to waiting on another developer.
Finally, weeks later they came to me because my piece would not run in production.
I could not figure out why it wouldn't run.
Finally, I looked at the code and it was nothing I'd ever seen before. I could not figure out who wrote this code, which was supposed to be mine.
Finally, I discovered a Contractor-Genius had rewritten it. I asked him why.
"Your code was wrong," he said.
"Yes", I said, "apparently we could tell it was wrong because it actually runs. Yours however is completely right except one small thing: it doesn't run." 
"Well," he said. "You've got to get it running in production."
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didn't keep a personal backup?
you just restore to that, quick check, and hand it back to them [as you leave for the day].
Format Success.
Welcome to your new signa&*(gD@@@ @@@@@@*@x@@
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Lopatir wrote: you just restore to that, quick check, and hand it back to them
That is exactly how I handled it.
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Time for another vacation! 
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Your coworkers have orked your features?
That's easy:
1) Don't say a word.
2) Give them a long, sad, disappointed and otherwise unreadable look.
3) Turn around and leave for the rest of the day. Don't react to any attempt to communicate. Everything has been said.
4) Return tomorrow with a request for another vacation.
I am endeavoring, ma'am, to construct a mnemonic memory circuit using stone knives and bearskins.
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I think this falls cleanly under the "you break it, you buy it" rule.
"There are three kinds of lies: lies, damned lies and statistics."
- Benjamin Disraeli
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