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What is the most inappropriate thing you've ever said?
True stories only.
For me, it was probably when a fellow at work was telling me about the passing of his uncle. As it turns out, over that weekend his uncle had died on the golf course.
I asked: "What hole was he on?"
I got a blank stare in return.
Second place would probably be at a family reunion when my 6 year old niece entered the room with a banana in her pocket. Naturally, I had to ask: "Is that a banana in your pocket or are you glad to see me?"
To this day my brother in law will not let his kids stay at our house.
In my defense, how often does someone actually have a banana in their pocket?
I feel fate really was unfair - I had to ask the question.
There was no resisting it.
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"Isn't amazing how all babies look like Ed Asner". Said to new parents 
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It's getting to the point where I don't even want to be around other people when they're experiencing a life changing event (wedding, divorce, birth, death, fruit concealed in pockets) because I'll say something stupid.
Your Ed Asner comment is funny - I think it was worth it.
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Bloke on Facebook last week put a photo of his baby in the bath on with a proper Hitler style haircut.
So difficult not to comment, as his sister is my wife's best friend I just about contained myself.
“I believe that there is an equality to all humanity. We all suck.” Bill Hicks
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That's why you have alternate Facebook accounts. 
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MehGerbil wrote: Second place would probably be at a family reunion when my 6 year old niece entered the room with a banana in her pocket. Naturally, I had to ask: "Is that a banana in your pocket or are you glad to see me?"
I think your perception of innapropiate and mine are quite different, I would put that in first place.
If you think you can do a thing or think you can't do a thing, you're right - Henry Ford
Emmanuel Medina Lopez
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Any man who could resist saying that, given the circumstances, is a better man than I by far.
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Your BIL is right.
If your actions inspire others to dream more, learn more, do more and become more, you are a leader.-John Q. Adams
You must accept one of two basic premises: Either we are alone in the universe, or we are not alone in the universe. And either way, the implications are staggering.-Wernher von Braun
Only two things are infinite, the universe and human stupidity, and I'm not sure about the former.-Albert Einstein
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MehGerbil wrote: In my defense, how often does someone actually have a banana in their pocket?
Sorry but I am pretty sure that statement itself, in the context of the original situation, is also inappropriate.
MehGerbil wrote: There was no resisting it.
There are a vast number of things that one must "resist" doing when around children.
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jschell wrote: There are a vast number of things that one must "resist" doing when around children.
You know, this can easily be taken out of context 
If you think you can do a thing or think you can't do a thing, you're right - Henry Ford
Emmanuel Medina Lopez
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I'm pretty sure jschell's comments in this thread are also his entries.
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Regarding the banana incident, what was the girl's reaction? I'm guessing a 6 year old isn't going to understand the sexual innuendo but rather the adults overreacted.
BDF
I often make very large prints from unexposed film, and every one of them turns out to be a picture of myself as I once dreamed I would be.
-- BillWoodruff
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She had no idea.
The father shot me a dirty look though.
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MehGerbil wrote: She had no idea.
The defense rests.
I don't see why people here are so bent out of shape about this. It went over the girl's head as I supposed it would.
BDF
I often make very large prints from unexposed film, and every one of them turns out to be a picture of myself as I once dreamed I would be.
-- BillWoodruff
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Kids are often like recorders with replay buttons that you have no control over. They don't need to understand what they've recorded and replay.
My BIL and I, along with a couple of our friends, have gotten his 8 year old son into the habit of saying, "That's what she said." It wasn't entirely intentional, it's just something we say to each other often.
The vast majority of the time he doesn't say it at... let's say an appropriately inappropriate time, but every once in a while he nails it, and we find it hysterical. He has no idea why it's so funny, but he likes the attention nonetheless. I'm just waiting for the day he gets in trouble at school. My sister is, needless to say, rather annoyed with all of us.
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My kid is nearly twelve and has gotten that from somewhere (Youtube?) -- though of course I use it too.
As luck would have it, a few weeks ago the tech writer lady at work advised me that I hadn't given her enough documentation to include in the overall project documentation -- but she worded it as "you didn't give me enough meat". You can imagine the first thing that popped into my head, but I resisted, and instead replied "I've heard that before".
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MehGerbil wrote: To this day my brother in law will not let his kids stay at our house.
And you're surprised?
MehGerbil wrote: In my defense, how often does someone actually have a banana in their pocket?
Does it matter? She was 6!!!
MehGerbil wrote: I feel fate really was unfair - I had to ask the question.
There was no
resisting it.
You need professional help - I think your BIL under-reacted.
"If you think it's expensive to hire a professional to do the job, wait until you hire an amateur." Red Adair.
nils illegitimus carborundum
me, me, me
me, in pictures
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mark merrens wrote: You need professional help
What? You mean like a hooker?
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Yes, like this[^].
"If you think it's expensive to hire a professional to do the job, wait until you hire an amateur." Red Adair.
nils illegitimus carborundum
me, me, me
me, in pictures
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mark merrens wrote: You need professional help - I think your BIL under-reacted.
And this is precisely what's wrong with society these days...
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_Damian S_ wrote: And this is precisely what's wrong with society these days...
You mean versus 100 years ago when it was unlikely that the family much less the child would even have a banana?
And where the father and a couple of neighbors could take the idiot into the backyard and beat him senseless without interference from others and certainly not the police?
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jschell wrote: And where the father and a couple of neighbors could take the idiot into the
backyard and beat him senseless without interference from others and certainly
not the police?
Yes, that's precisely what I meant, because I'm incapable of seeing anything other than two absurd ends of a spectrum... 
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_Damian S_ wrote: Yes, that's precisely what I meant, because I'm incapable of seeing anything other than two absurd ends of a spectrum..
Well it hard to determine what "these days" means.
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Does it matter anymore?
"You can say it's chilly outside, and this spring is cooler than most", and your sure to offend some whackadoodle.
"Sanity is not statistical."
- Eric Blair, 1984, Chapter 9
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kmg365 wrote: ..it's chilly outside, and this spring is cooler than most
So you're one of those nuts that denies global warming?
YOU'LL KILL ALL OF US - I HOPE YOU DIE IN A FIRE!
Yeah, I agree with you, it's getting bad out there.
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