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Everything in column A causes cancer.
Everything in column B cures cancer.
The only question is which things are in each column... And I'm pretty sure there's a random number generator (Well, letter generator) involved.
So the choices are:
1) Pay attention to the two columns, make sure never to eat anything in column A (Until the next study shows up and it moves to column B... and back a week later), and live in perpetual fear of getting cancer.
2) Quit your whining and have a bacon cheeseburger
So I'm with you... Pass me some of that bacon! 
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R. Giskard Reventlov wrote: just means more bacon and cancer for me!
FTFY 
There are only 10 types of people in the world, those who understand binary and those who don't.
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On the bright side they can now start to ban pig-derived products so as not to offend Muslims under the guise that they're doing it for reasons of public health. Now if only they could find a link between Christmas and cancer...
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F-ES Sitecore wrote: Now if only they could find a link between Christmas and cancer...
Pigs in blankets[^]! 
(The UK version, not the bizarre 'merkin version.)
"These people looked deep within my soul and assigned me a number based on the order in which I joined."
- Homer
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Richard Deeming wrote: not the bizarre 'merkin version.
What's the 'merkin version? I am American and the link you provided is the one that I know. 
There are only 10 types of people in the world, those who understand binary and those who don't.
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But the link I provided has multiple different versions. 
The UK version is chipolata sausages wrapped in bacon. The US version is apparently "Vienna sausages, hot dogs, cocktail or breakfast/link sausages wrapped in biscuit dough, pancake, or croissant dough, and baked", which just doesn't sound as tasty.
"These people looked deep within my soul and assigned me a number based on the order in which I joined."
- Homer
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Mini-kolbasi are better than hotdogs; but it works well for fingerfood; something that a bacon wrapping-however delicious- is too greasy to work well for.
When you started talking about multiple versions, I was actually expecting the other version to be something completely different[^]; OTOH around here (SW PA) the Slovak name's probably at least as likely to be used as pigs in a blanket. On the gripping hand, two of my great grandparents were Slovak; so there might be a sampling problem. 
Did you ever see history portrayed as an old man with a wise brow and pulseless heart, waging all things in the balance of reason?
Is not rather the genius of history like an eternal, imploring maiden, full of fire, with a burning heart and flaming soul, humanly warm and humanly beautiful?
--Zachris Topelius
Training a telescope on one’s own belly button will only reveal lint. You like that? You go right on staring at it. I prefer looking at galaxies.
-- Sarah Hoyt
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F-ES Sitecore wrote: they can now start to ban pig-derived products so as not to offend Muslims
A thousand of blaspheme puns are now twirling in my mind but this ain't the back room so I'll keep them to myself. 
GCS d--- s-/++ a- C++++ U+++ P- L- E-- W++ N++ o+ K- w+++ O? M-- V? PS+ PE- Y+ PGP t++ 5? X R++ tv-- b+ DI+++ D++ G e++>+++ h--- ++>+++ y+++* Weapons extension: ma- k++ F+2 X
If you think 'goto' is evil, try writing an Assembly program without JMP. -- TNCaver
"When you have eliminated the JavaScript, whatever remains must be an empty page." -- Mike Hankey
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Bacon is love, Bacon is life,
never give it up
or you'll DIAF for gods Sake!
Rules for the FOSW ![ ^]
if(this.signature != "")
{
MessageBox.Show("This is my signature: " + Environment.NewLine + signature);
}
else
{
MessageBox.Show("404-Signature not found");
}
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About the only thing they haven't tried to ban is breathing - and I'm fairly sure that the air in London, Beijing, and loads of other cities is probably more toxic than BACON.
Veganistas strike again, I suspect.
Bad command or file name. Bad, bad command! Sit! Stay! Staaaay...
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The article admits: A ban on all red and processed meats, would mean just 8,800 fewer [cancer] cases [in the UK].
So why does everyone care so much? Even the best possible improvement is irrelevant. We have already wasted more of the world wide GDP just discussing this than we could ever regain by preventing the deaths of some assets.
On a personal level, the risk is already so low that just commuting to work today obliterated any risk-prevention you could do by cutting meat.
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A: Never saw that.
B: Even if I had, you cannot post often enough about Bacon.
C: Leslie loved Bacon.
D: Are you a bacon hater???
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Not a bacon hater, just never really had the opportunity to be one of those annoying repost cop types. It makes me feel warm and fuzzy.
Jeremy Falcon
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Quote: the effect is much smaller than, for example, that of cigarette smoking on the risk of lung cancer. It is also worth noting that there is little or no evidence that vegetarians in the UK have a lower risk of bowel cancer than meat-eaters.”
I believe that vegetarians die more frequently of heart attacks because of the high stress of being hated by everyone else.
- I would love to change the world, but they won’t give me the source code.
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It is a well documented fact that Bacon cures most diseases and cancers. Propaganda, for sure. 
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Slacker007 wrote: It is a well documented fact that Chicken Soup cures most diseases and cancers.
FTFY.
Just ask any Jewish grandmother
If you have an important point to make, don't try to be subtle or clever. Use a pile driver. Hit the point once. Then come back and hit it again. Then hit it a third time - a tremendous whack.
--Winston Churchill
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 +24
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Bacon ipsum lorem[^]
it ain’t broke, it doesn’t have enough features yet.
modified 20-Oct-19 21:02pm.
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I finally achieved 10k rep points! I am valuable* now
*at least a little valuable
Rules for the FOSW ![ ^]
if(this.signature != "")
{
MessageBox.Show("This is my signature: " + Environment.NewLine + signature);
}
else
{
MessageBox.Show("404-Signature not found");
}
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If you feel uncomfortable with that, we can downvote you all around, until you drop back under 10K
Skipper: We'll fix it.
Alex: Fix it? How you gonna fix this?
Skipper: Grit, spit and a whole lotta duct tape.
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Don't make me cry 
Rules for the FOSW ![ ^]
if(this.signature != "")
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else
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}
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Awesome 
Regards,
Palash
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