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The jar of fermented cerebrum that's cracked from internal pressure after being forgotten for several years behind all the other stuff on the shelf and is now oozing down the back corner of your fridge from top to bottom. 
Did you ever see history portrayed as an old man with a wise brow and pulseless heart, waging all things in the balance of reason?
Is not rather the genius of history like an eternal, imploring maiden, full of fire, with a burning heart and flaming soul, humanly warm and humanly beautiful?
--Zachris Topelius
Training a telescope on one’s own belly button will only reveal lint. You like that? You go right on staring at it. I prefer looking at galaxies.
-- Sarah Hoyt
modified 11-Dec-15 13:28pm.
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I never thought it possible, but it's true someone can drink more than me and appear functional! 
veni bibi saltavi
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It's 9:30am. I'm at the office and sober. What amazed me is that none of the other weirdos here took you up on what seemed to be an obvious setup line for a troll answer.
Did you ever see history portrayed as an old man with a wise brow and pulseless heart, waging all things in the balance of reason?
Is not rather the genius of history like an eternal, imploring maiden, full of fire, with a burning heart and flaming soul, humanly warm and humanly beautiful?
--Zachris Topelius
Training a telescope on one’s own belly button will only reveal lint. You like that? You go right on staring at it. I prefer looking at galaxies.
-- Sarah Hoyt
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Quote: a troll zombie answer
FTFY - clearly a zombie answer!
- I would love to change the world, but they won’t give me the source code.
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oh gawd - dont even mention it - there's been something unmentionable in our fridge for 2+ weeks I havnt been able to track down - so with the mouldies (my parents live with me) shipped off to NZ along with my Sis as a 'companion' for my mum while dad is bushwalking with my brother, guess who's job it is to strip the fridge and find that elusive smell 
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Sausage
Pepperoni
Ham
Decrease the belief in God, and you increase the numbers of those who wish to play at being God by being “society’s supervisors,” who deny the existence of divine standards, but are very serious about imposing their own standards on society.-Neal A. Maxwell
You must accept 1 of 2 basic premises: Either we are alone in the universe or we are not alone. Either way, the implications are staggering!-Wernher von Braun
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SFW[^]
... I've been doing that for decades, and I don't even live in Japan! 
Anything that is unrelated to elephants is irrelephant
Anonymous
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The problem with quotes on the internet is that you can never tell if they're genuine
Winston Churchill, 1944
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I'd just like a chance to prove that money can't make me happy.
Me, all the time
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I worked for a Japanese company once (not in Japan) and we had some Japanese workers come over to work in our team, and that is one country I would hate to work at. It's brutal and many people do sleep at their desks...not in the manner in this article, but they'll work til 8pm, 9pm at night, sleep under their desks and start again at 7am. In their culture it's important to show that you're working as hard as you possibly can. If they take time off they have to apologise to the whole company when they return...the stories are endless. The mind boggles.
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Yes, I can confirm that. And never never never leave the Office before the Boss.
modified 19-Jan-21 21:04pm.
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Wasn't there some article recently that mentioned the Japanese don't necessarily embrace technology in the workplace as much as we do elsewhere, and as a result they tend to a lot of things manually that could be automated or done much more efficiently...such as still relying on fax and printed inter-office memos...and thus despite working a lot more hours on average than the rest of the world, productivity remains remarkably low...
Kinda sad for such well-educated and hard workers. I'm not a "technology for technology's sake" kind of guy, but where there's room for improvement - you might as well integrate these in your work habits.
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I suggested that we have an area set aside for power naps where I work now, but the idea was rejected.
Some men are born mediocre, some men achieve mediocrity, and some men have mediocrity thrust upon them.
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I find the amount of ads on this site disturbing.
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Me too, and I don't like the way they split even very little content into 10 pages you have to navigate through...
Anything that is unrelated to elephants is irrelephant
Anonymous
-
The problem with quotes on the internet is that you can never tell if they're genuine
Winston Churchill, 1944
-
I'd just like a chance to prove that money can't make me happy.
Me, all the time
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I do like my nanna power nap after lunch, just 15-30 minutes and I'm up and ready to go again.
Never underestimate the power of human stupidity
RAH
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Fake a Teletubby? Oxygen for your hair! (7)
Bad command or file name. Bad, bad command! Sit! Stay! Staaaay...
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Shampoo
Fake = sham
Tellytubby = po
Oxygen = o
We can’t stop here, this is bat country - Hunter S Thompson RIP
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And you are up on Monday! 
Bad command or file name. Bad, bad command! Sit! Stay! Staaaay...
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I must admit I had to look up the names of the tellytubbies but I'd guessed it from the sham part
We can’t stop here, this is bat country - Hunter S Thompson RIP
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I had some help there.
Years ago, we came home to a telephone message from a friend's girlfriend, Lorraine:
"Hello! It's La
... (long pause)
La
... (long pause)
Lorraine.
...
Are you there?
No? OK, well I'm coming round in 5 minutes if that's OK?
... (long pause for us to answer)
Oh. Is it Ok if I come round?
...
Oh. You aren't there.
I'll come round anyway."
After which she was referred to as "the Kent Road Tellytubby"...
Bad command or file name. Bad, bad command! Sit! Stay! Staaaay...
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We can’t stop here, this is bat country - Hunter S Thompson RIP
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</\((cƆ) (8)
Don't mind the gap, HTML is bad today :/
And se fun beginZ!
Hints:
1. Everyone has it!
2. Size matters!
Rules for the FOSW ![ ^]
if(this.signature != "")
{
MessageBox.Show("This is my signature: " + Environment.NewLine + signature);
}
else
{
MessageBox.Show("404-Signature not found");
}
modified 11-Dec-15 7:25am.
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Done no HTML lately?
Without gap:
</\((cƆ)
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But how  ?
Rules for the FOSW ![ ^]
if(this.signature != "")
{
MessageBox.Show("This is my signature: " + Environment.NewLine + signature);
}
else
{
MessageBox.Show("404-Signature not found");
}
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Just use the character reference for the back slash: \
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looks to me like an animal then I can see a cup of tea (or coffee may be) in there.
So a clue may be? As peeps here happened to be a bit clueless 
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