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Well, Kornfeld, back in the day when Bill had taste-buds, he had a mean southern-style (southern USA, that is) recipe for turning a turkey corpse into a banquet for many.
Assuming you start with a frozen turkey:
0. remove the giblets first (look for the bag in the internal cavity), set aside in the refrigerator to defrost. note how you prepare the giblets is not described here; some people discard the giblets, but that's not the southern way: in the south they'd be turned into turkey gravy.
1. thaw turkey if frozen (how long will depend on weight of bird)
2. rinse with wate, flush internal body cavity, etc. pat dry with kitchen towels.
3. prepare about one quart of stuffing mix:
3.a. about three cups of corn-meal
3.b. one cup chopped celery
3.c. one large can water-chestnuts, chopped
3.d. one cup chives chopped
3.d. small amounts of cardamom, cinnamon ... to taste ... one teaspoon ground black pepper, one-half teaspoon salt
3.e. two tablespoons of baking powder
3.f. one-half cup chopped garlic
3.g. one teaspoon soy-sauce
3.h. one teaspoon vinegar
3.i. one tablespoon sesame oil
3.j. two cups of buttermilk
Melt half-stick of butter, add sesame oil, salt, black-pepper, vinegar, soy-sauce, bring to low heat,
Add garlic, chives, celery, stir and simmer for ten minutes
Combine with corn-meal, buttermilk, baking powder, cardamom, cinnamon, water-chestnuts in bowl
Pat dry the turkey internal cavity with kitchen-towels.
Mix, then insert into turkey internal cavity, wire the drumsticks together the usual way to seal in the stuffing.
Wrap the bird in heavy aluminum foil and put in oven pre-heated to 325F. After one hour, open and baste with your basting mixture (your choice, there;, down in the south that mixture might include a mix of honey and Jack Daniels whisky in which cloves have been sauteed, and a heap of melted butter).
Then raise temperature to 350F, and cook for two-to-four hours more (total cooking time will depend on weight of the turkey). Baste a second, or third time, depending on total cooking time.
See table here for cooking time guidelines: [^].
It is best that you check the internal temperature of the stuffing in the body cavity with a cooking thermometer of the probe type to make sure it reached at least 165F ... for food safety reasons.
Also, imho, best to let the cooked turkey sit for half-an-hour before serving.
cheers, Bill
p.s. of course without fresh whole-cranberries mixed with zest of lemon, or lime, or even some mint leaves, that turkey is going to be a bit less magical.
p.s.p.s. cardamom is not found, to my knowledge, in southern American cooking, but it's a personal favorite of mine. and, water-chestnuts are a non-traditional ingredient that would probably make hillbillies go get their shotguns.
p.s.p.s.p.s. northern Thailand is having a turkey drought because imports from the U.S. were halted because of turkey-flu. getting an imported turkey here, right now, would cost over US $12 per kilo at the current "inflated" rate. as for Thai turkeys: well, better just let them alone to pursue their scraggly, bedraggled, scrawny existence.
«I want to stay as close to the edge as I can without going over. Out on the edge you see all kinds of things you can't see from the center» Kurt Vonnegut.
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At long last, you're finally with the program.
I shall keep my tradition (as of tomorrow, it's a tradition) and make Eggrolls. As a concession to the season, I'll use Tofurkey Sausage as an ingredient.
| "The difference between genius and stupidity is that genius has its limits." - Albert Einstein | | "As far as we know, our computer has never had an undetected error." - Weisert | | "If you are searching for perfection in others, then you seek disappointment. If you are seek perfection in yourself, then you will find failure." - Balboos HaGadol Mar 2010 |
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Shoot a Russian plane down?
New version: WinHeist Version You didn't fall from the stupid tree you got dragged through the whole dumbass forest.
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I take him aside and gently explain the facts of life.
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http://xkcd.com/1608/[^]
How long did that take him? 
Bad command or file name. Bad, bad command! Sit! Stay! Staaaay...
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Nice game 
Rules for the FOSW ![ ^]
if(this.signature != "")
{
MessageBox.Show("This is my signature: " + Environment.NewLine + signature);
}
else
{
MessageBox.Show("404-Signature not found");
}
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So, you only think inside the box, huh?
Try looking outside the play area... 
Bad command or file name. Bad, bad command! Sit! Stay! Staaaay...
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I already did, still it's a nice game?
Rules for the FOSW ![ ^]
if(this.signature != "")
{
MessageBox.Show("This is my signature: " + Environment.NewLine + signature);
}
else
{
MessageBox.Show("404-Signature not found");
}
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Star Destroyer!
veni bibi saltavi
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Tetris!
Joust!
Bad command or file name. Bad, bad command! Sit! Stay! Staaaay...
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i hope he will make this a whale screenshot, it's so big you cant even get to everything.
Rules for the FOSW ![ ^]
if(this.signature != "")
{
MessageBox.Show("This is my signature: " + Environment.NewLine + signature);
}
else
{
MessageBox.Show("404-Signature not found");
}
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Nice
But sadly you can't read the texts
Rules for the FOSW ![ ^]
if(this.signature != "")
{
MessageBox.Show("This is my signature: " + Environment.NewLine + signature);
}
else
{
MessageBox.Show("404-Signature not found");
}
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Picky! Picky!
veni bibi saltavi
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It is so huge 
Rules for the FOSW ![ ^]
if(this.signature != "")
{
MessageBox.Show("This is my signature: " + Environment.NewLine + signature);
}
else
{
MessageBox.Show("404-Signature not found");
}
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damn,.. got 161 Coins.. Had not found that floating 'island' over the destroyer :/
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It took me 43 seconds, or do you mean how long to make it?
veni bibi saltavi
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Did you go outside the play area?
Find the volcano? The Star Destroyer?
Bad command or file name. Bad, bad command! Sit! Stay! Staaaay...
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I reached the place where the great Jabba The Hut was willing to listen to my pleas 
The language is JavaScript. that of Mordor, which I will not utter here
This is Javascript. If you put big wheels and a racing stripe on a golf cart, it's still a f***ing golf cart.
"I don't know, extraterrestrial?"
"You mean like from space?"
"No, from Canada."
If software development were a circus, we would all be the clowns.
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I found the park inside the Star Destroyer.
Bad command or file name. Bad, bad command! Sit! Stay! Staaaay...
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X-Wing Fighter at a filling station?
veni bibi saltavi
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Buggy as hell, keeps getting stuck on walls and sometimes you fall through things. This will be on Angry Joe's worst games of 2015 for sure.
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I went left - it took me over 10 minutes to got stopped, and didn't examined even half of the things I saw and didn't go hi or low...
I will need a week or two to check all this...
(or crack the loading js and see all the images together )
Skipper: We'll fix it.
Alex: Fix it? How you gonna fix this?
Skipper: Grit, spit and a whole lotta duct tape.
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