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I remember my careers advice interview on leaving school in the early '80s.
After being poo-pooed on my initial suggestions (demon fast-bowler, astronaut, gigolo etc.), I put forward the idea of working with computers only to be told to stop being ridiculous as they'd never catch on.
I should have listened ...
98.4% of statistics are made up on the spot.
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Thomas Watson, president of IBM, 1943 said: "I think there is a world market for maybe five computers."
There can't be many more than that these days, can there?
Bad command or file name. Bad, bad command! Sit! Stay! Staaaay...
AntiTwitter: @DalekDave is now a follower!
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If only!
98.4% of statistics are made up on the spot.
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"You will spend your entire professional life either in your cube, or in the meeting room".
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Software Zen: delete this;
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"in the meeting room".
Donuts, yum.
Arguing with a woman is like reading the Software License Agreement. In the end, you ignore everything and click "I agree".
Anonymous
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Quote: Everything you learned at school will be obsolete in six months.
That's rather optimistic. Surely it should be, "Everything you learned at school was obsolete ten years ago"? 
"These people looked deep within my soul and assigned me a number based on the order in which I joined."
- Homer
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That so resembles the place where I work that it's sad rather than funny.
Marc
Latest Article - Create a Dockerized Python Fiddle Web App
Learning to code with python is like learning to swim with those little arm floaties. It gives you undeserved confidence and will eventually drown you. - DangerBunny
Artificial intelligence is the only remedy for natural stupidity. - CDP1802
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I own a small plumbing company. I answer an emergency call today from some guy whining about water in his utility room and not being able to get WiFi. I explain that I'm on a job and will be there around 4pm. He howls about wrenches and rude neighbors and sputters about his WiFi again so I tell him I'll drop everything and get right out. I hope the home-bound retiree I'm leaving without water will be OK.
When I arrive the homeowner is in his bath robe and is still ranting like a fiend. Eventually he shows me his utility room where I find a corroded dielectric union. I tell him the best solution is to replace the union but I'll need to shut-off his water and drain the tank to do it properly since the water heater was installed improperly and I'll have to modify his supply. Total job cost is $600.
Dude almost passed out! Started screaming about how he "installed the water heater myself 3 years before and how dare I tell him it's wrong. $600 is highway robbery!"
Then he had the nerve to ask me to borrow a wrench! Idiot!
In this present crisis, government is not the solution to our problem; government is the problem. ~ Ronald Reagan
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Funny story. Only about 3/5ths wrong, especially the part about DIY WH install.
#SupportHeForShe
Government can give you nothing but what it takes from somebody else. A government big enough to give you everything you want is big enough to take everything you've got, including your freedom.-Ezra Taft Benson
You must accept 1 of 2 basic premises: Either we are alone in the universe or we are not alone. Either way, the implications are staggering!-Wernher von Braun
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TheGreatAndPowerfulOz wrote: 3/5ths
This is 1/6th wrong. 
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LOL.
Touché.
#SupportHeForShe
Government can give you nothing but what it takes from somebody else. A government big enough to give you everything you want is big enough to take everything you've got, including your freedom.-Ezra Taft Benson
You must accept 1 of 2 basic premises: Either we are alone in the universe or we are not alone. Either way, the implications are staggering!-Wernher von Braun
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So while investigating why my home wired network was not working, I discovered the switch was off due to a breaker being thrown because of water in my utility room from my water heater spraying water from a fitting. Not having a wrench handy (and my neighbors not answering phones) I called a plumber. They wanted $600. I told them "No!". I eventually got a wrench and tightened what turned out to be a loose fitting (the dielectric union had come loose).
All of which took 30 seconds.
Idiot. Had he said $50, I would have said "Do it". He looked genuinely surprised when I said "No" and acted kinda awkward as if he'd never had that experience before.
Grrr.
#SupportHeForShe
Government can give you nothing but what it takes from somebody else. A government big enough to give you everything you want is big enough to take everything you've got, including your freedom.-Ezra Taft Benson
You must accept 1 of 2 basic premises: Either we are alone in the universe or we are not alone. Either way, the implications are staggering!-Wernher von Braun
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Ah, the joys of home ownership. Sigh.
if (Object.DividedByZero == true) { Universe.Implode(); }
Meus ratio ex fortis machina. Simplicitatis de formae ac munus. -Foothill, 2016
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The joys of emergency plumbing... 
Bad command or file name. Bad, bad command! Sit! Stay! Staaaay...
AntiTwitter: @DalekDave is now a follower!
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Foothill wrote: Ah, the joys of home ownership. Sigh.
kids today.
Once needed some plumbing work done moving a toilet a few feet over.
Quotes starting at $2000 plus whatever the builder would charge for his part of the work.
Final cost, about $150 (including new toilet set) and about an hour on google.
not hard at all. (And because the move was under 4 feet no permit or certified plumber was actually required.)
Next job was electrics, found out the original "certified" electrician had crossed the wires to the fluorescent lights - why they used to glow at night when switched off. Easy stuff.
Also done floors, framed walls (only cheat was pre-fabed framing direct from supplier - cheap), stair cases, complete bathroom, ceiling tiles, fences, window glass, brick work, basic mechanical.
Tradesmen don't cost a fortune because the work is hard,
rather they are 100% preying on laziness. (it's all on google, no excuses.)
Sin tack
the any key okay
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Lopatir wrote: Quotes starting at $2000...
How much of that was materials?
"One man's wage rise is another man's price increase." - Harold Wilson
"Fireproof doesn't mean the fire will never come. It means when the fire comes that you will be able to withstand it." - Michael Simmons
"You can easily judge the character of a man by how he treats those who can do nothing for him." - James D. Miles
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At a guess, about $150... 
Bad command or file name. Bad, bad command! Sit! Stay! Staaaay...
AntiTwitter: @DalekDave is now a follower!
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Yep, done all that. And as a result have respect for those who choose that as their day job, day-in-day-out. It may be simple to do, as in not complicated, but it's not easy work.
#SupportHeForShe
Government can give you nothing but what it takes from somebody else. A government big enough to give you everything you want is big enough to take everything you've got, including your freedom.-Ezra Taft Benson
You must accept 1 of 2 basic premises: Either we are alone in the universe or we are not alone. Either way, the implications are staggering!-Wernher von Braun
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Lopatir wrote: they are 100% preying on laziness. (it's all on google, no excuses.)
I myself am working towards never needing to hire a 'professional' when it comes to home repair and improvement. First step was spending 3 days over the Memorial Day weekend building a workbench in my garage. It was about $650 in materials but the thing is very sturdy. It has a peg board, its own independent power panel, and several stand-alone 20A circuits. It ate up most of the holiday and it was hard work but it's done now and I can now start working on more ambitious projects.
if (Object.DividedByZero == true) { Universe.Implode(); }
Meus ratio ex fortis machina. Simplicitatis de formae ac munus. -Foothill, 2016
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Maybe it won't wind up like my workbench...covered with junk and nowhere to work!
"Go forth into the source" - Neal Morse
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My workbench is clean as a whistle - because I never get near the thing!
Get me coffee and no one gets hurt!
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