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We used to have a cat - called Beldin - who woke me up every morning in exactly the same way: a Gorbals Kiss[^] right on the bridge of my nose, with all his strength. Since he weighed in at 8 or 9 Kg, you can image how well this worked. I woke up.
I didn't get up, in the hope this would not encourage such behaviour in the future, but I did indeed wake up.
Bad command or file name. Bad, bad command! Sit! Stay! Staaaay...
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No saving roll against breath weapon?
I have lived with several Zen masters - all of them were cats.
His last invention was an evil Lasagna. It didn't kill anyone, and it actually tasted pretty good.
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Trust me, when a 9Kg cat is trying to break your nose, you don't worry about his breath...
Bad command or file name. Bad, bad command! Sit! Stay! Staaaay...
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Our one hops on my belly which puts pressure on the early morning bladder....
A Fine is a Tax for doing something wrong
A Tax is a Fine for doing something good.
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The current one does that, and "kneading" on any other vulnerable bits - I think it's revenge for having his removed.
Bad command or file name. Bad, bad command! Sit! Stay! Staaaay...
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And that's not much fun on hot summer nights when you just have a sheet for protection!
A Fine is a Tax for doing something wrong
A Tax is a Fine for doing something good.
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RossMW wrote: And that's not much fun on hot summer nights when you just have a sheet for protection!
Not in Wales I wouldn't think. Hits 19 celsius hottest day in summer don't it?
Michael Martin
Australia
"I controlled my laughter and simple said "No,I am very busy,so I can't write any code for you". The moment they heard this all the smiling face turned into a sad looking face and one of them farted. So I had to leave the place as soon as possible."
- Mr.Prakash One Fine Saturday. 24/04/2004
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My huge Siamese cat simply jumps on bed and his truck-like purring plus his weight are enough to wake up anyone.
GCS d-- s-/++ a- C++++ U+++ P- L+@ E-- W++ N+ o+ K- w+++ O? M-- V? PS+ PE- Y+ PGP t+ 5? X R+++ tv-- b+(+++) DI+++ D++ G e++ h--- ++>+++ y+++* Weapons extension: ma- k++ F+2 X
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What a sweet kitty; a wake-up reminder without extended claws.
| Ravings en masse^ |
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| "The difference between genius and stupidity is that genius has its limits." - Albert Einstein | | "If you are searching for perfection in others, then you seek disappointment. If you are seek perfection in yourself, then you will find failure." - Balboos HaGadol Mar 2010 |
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HIJKLMNO (5)
Bad command or file name. Bad, bad command! Sit! Stay! Staaaay...
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It's everywhere but there's nowt to drink 
This space for rent
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Hmmm,
Pete O'Hanlon wrote: It's everywhere but there's nowt to drink
But H₂O is only 3 letters. So that can't be it!
Best Wishes,
-David Delaune
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I liked this one!
Don't think it'll last too long, but ... 
Bad command or file name. Bad, bad command! Sit! Stay! Staaaay...
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Nope.
Nope.
Bad command or file name. Bad, bad command! Sit! Stay! Staaaay...
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Water (H2O dingbat thereof) - think Pete might possibly have guessed this, too 
98.4% of statistics are made up on the spot.
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Waaaah! I was just typing the same, but went looking for a subscript ₂ !
... such stuff as dreams are made on
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D'Oh! That infernal obsession with detail! 
98.4% of statistics are made up on the spot.
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And Randor as well.
I liked this one!
Bad command or file name. Bad, bad command! Sit! Stay! Staaaay...
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This time I got answer from Google Search but didn't want to post it.
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Is correct, but unfortunately, too late. 
Bad command or file name. Bad, bad command! Sit! Stay! Staaaay...
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Before reading the others, my mind went astray on the old FORTRAN naming convention where symbols starting with IJKLMN are integers by default... 
... such stuff as dreams are made on
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No, no - water isn't FLOAT, things float on water ... H2O is REAL though... 
Bad command or file name. Bad, bad command! Sit! Stay! Staaaay...
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That could have led to some H-INTs!
98.4% of statistics are made up on the spot.
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