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She bought me a Derby shirt one year, and had Elston printed on the back. She didn't know better, but I had to wear it to a home game.
Every time I stood up to shout at the players or referee someone behind would yell "Oi! Elston! Si'dahn". Then more and more picked up on it. Bloody nightmare.
Not long after we started seeing each other she liked a 'keeper top we had, so I bought her one. Discussing if she wanted anything on the back I asked if she wanted a number, she asked like what? I said how about 8. She said why 8? I said, well 88 is two fat ladies. She has quite a decent punch to be fair.
Every man can tell how many goats or sheep he possesses, but not how many friends.
Shed Petition[ ^]
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Ladies in football kits turn me on.
Except if they are lady footballers, they tend to be a bit butch.
But I got Michelle the England top and I must say it help me score a few times.
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I will never again mention that I was the poster of the One Millionth Lounge Post, nor that it was complete drivel. Dalek Dave
CCC Link[ ^]
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yeah - well it's pretty easy to score against england these days ...
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When I was in my early 20s I was seeing for a while a very rude young lady who was a Villa season ticket holder. She wanted me to 'perform' in my Derby shirt, but I couldn't do it to the shirt because she was a Villa fan.
One memorable evening she managed to squeeze herself into my old cub scout uniform. This story is no longer suitable for the internet, and the internet is a very open-minded place.
Every man can tell how many goats or sheep he possesses, but not how many friends.
Shed Petition[ ^]
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Dib Dib Dib!
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I will never again mention that I was the poster of the One Millionth Lounge Post, nor that it was complete drivel. Dalek Dave
CCC Link[ ^]
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Dalek Dave wrote: I got Michelle the England top and I must say it help me score a few times
Yes, but only because there's a remote control that came with it ...
and when you push the button the top turns into a straitjacket. 
Cheers!
"I had the right to remain silent, but I didn't have the ability!"
Ron White, Comedian
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Is inability to count one of the 5 signs? 
Why can't I be applicable like John? - Me, April 2011
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Beidh ceol, caint agus craic againn - Seán Bán Breathnach
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Da mihi sis crustum Etruscum cum omnibus in eo!
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Just because a thing is new don’t mean that it’s better - Will Rogers, September 4, 1932
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Not having a sense of humour?
see point 5.
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I will never again mention that I was the poster of the One Millionth Lounge Post, nor that it was complete drivel. Dalek Dave
CCC Link[ ^]
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I was merely implementing point 4... 
Why can't I be applicable like John? - Me, April 2011
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Beidh ceol, caint agus craic againn - Seán Bán Breathnach
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Da mihi sis crustum Etruscum cum omnibus in eo!
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Just because a thing is new don’t mean that it’s better - Will Rogers, September 4, 1932
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Touché!
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I will never again mention that I was the poster of the One Millionth Lounge Post, nor that it was complete drivel. Dalek Dave
CCC Link[ ^]
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Damn I'm officially old. 
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There was no good music since.....
...Mozart????
Why can't I be applicable like John? - Me, April 2011
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Beidh ceol, caint agus craic againn - Seán Bán Breathnach
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Da mihi sis crustum Etruscum cum omnibus in eo!
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Just because a thing is new don’t mean that it’s better - Will Rogers, September 4, 1932
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Mozart was so advanced that by the time he was 4 he was 7.
Every man can tell how many goats or sheep he possesses, but not how many friends.
Shed Petition[ ^]
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