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In a trial, a Southern small-town prosecuting attorney called his first witness, a grandmotherly, elderly woman to the stand. He approached her and asked, 'Mrs. Jones, do you know me?' She responded, 'Why, yes, I do know you, Mr. Williams. I've known you since you were a boy, and frankly, you've been a big disappointment to me. You lie, you cheat on your wife, and you manipulate people and talk about them behind their backs. You think you're a big shot when you haven't the brains to realize you'll never amount to anything more than a two-bit paper pusher. Yes, I know you.'
The lawyer was stunned. Not knowing what else to do, he pointed across the room and asked, 'Mrs. Jones, do you know the defense attorney?'
She again replied, 'Why yes, I do. I've known Mr. Bradley since he was a
youngster, too. He's lazy, bigoted, and he has a drinking problem. He can't build a normal relationship with anyone, and his law practice is one of the worst in the entire state. Not to mention he cheated on his wife with three different women. One of them was your wife. Yes, I know him.'
The defense attorney nearly died.
The judge asked both counselors to approach the bench and, in a very quiet voice, said,
'If either of you idiots asks her if she knows me, I'll send you both to the electric chair.
Along with Antimatter and Dark Matter they've discovered the existence of Doesn't Matter which appears to have no effect on the universe whatsoever!
Rich Tennant 5th Wave
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/ravi
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Great one Mike... great one...
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Shut up and finish your Whiskey!
Happy St:Paddys day tomorrow.
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My grandmother always insisted it was ... "It looks, tastes good and by golly it does you good!" Mackeson_Stout[^]
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That's all right if you can afford it; have you seen the price of the stuff? Guinness, now that's the stout to have.
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Used to love drinking dark beer.
Along with Antimatter and Dark Matter they've discovered the existence of Doesn't Matter which appears to have no effect on the universe whatsoever!
Rich Tennant 5th Wave
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Mike Hankey wrote: Used to love drinking dark beer.
Agree, a good bottle can be a meal on it's own 
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Quote:
The surprising health benefits of beer
Yes, we get drunk we all know that... oh wait, it was something about the health benifits... never though about that before
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The study, mentioned at http://www.dailymail.co.uk/news/article-491236/A-pint-beer-better-workout-water-say-scientists.html[^], found that a pint of beer before drinking water hydrated the body faster. It was still necessary to drink water afterwards.
I am pretty sure that just drinking the beer alone would dehydrate the person in the long run. Alcohol suppresses the secretion of Adrenal Diuretic Hormone (ADH), which is what suppresses kidney function, thus lending credence to the old joke, "Beer is not purchased, it's merely rented." But drinking "a" beer followed by water might be better - although I'd want peer review and other researchers reproducing that result before I'd accept that as fact.
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ahh, right 
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Bill_Hallahan wrote: although I'd want pee-er review
FTFY
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Duke Carey wrote: Bill_Hallahan wrote: although I'd want pee-er review
FTFY
lol
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Yeah, well, I think I might have to continue conducting my own research anyway... Hick! 
Anything that is unrelated to elephants is irrelephant
Anonymous
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The problem with quotes on the internet is that you can never tell if they're genuine
Winston Churchill, 1944
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I'd just like a chance to prove that money can't make me happy.
Me, all the time
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...as I found this[^], which supports a ton of things and works on Windows and Linux (using Mono).
It looks like an awesome project.
What do you get when you cross a joke with a rhetorical question?
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Does look pretty cool thanks for the link.
Along with Antimatter and Dark Matter they've discovered the existence of Doesn't Matter which appears to have no effect on the universe whatsoever!
Rich Tennant 5th Wave
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Interesting, thanks ! I am curious: why would use this; what are its compelling benefits other than possible cross-platform use ?
“The best hope is that one of these days the Ground will get disgusted enough just to walk away ~ leaving people with nothing more to stand ON than what they have so bloody well stood FOR up to now.” Kenneth Patchen, Poet
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... will the counter reset?
... will he transition to another dimension where there are no questions in the forum?
... will he go to heaven where virgins wait?
... will he get a t-shirt from Chris thanking him for the fish?
or maybe we should start down vote him to stop the apocalypse?
the mind wonders...
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Your vision will fade to black, and a large sign will appear:
LEVEL 2
Those who fail to learn history are doomed to repeat it. --- George Santayana (December 16, 1863 – September 26, 1952)
Those who fail to clear history are doomed to explain it. --- OriginalGriff (February 24, 1959 – ∞)
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Do you get weapons and can you kill people?
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That's a very personal question!
Those who fail to learn history are doomed to repeat it. --- George Santayana (December 16, 1863 – September 26, 1952)
Those who fail to clear history are doomed to explain it. --- OriginalGriff (February 24, 1959 – ∞)
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Who says he hasn't already?
Software Zen: delete this;
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Or you could get a gun and go whild like Otto[^]
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