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If you pick up your keyboard, with CPU and monitor isn't that going to make it kinda hard to type?
I'd leave them on the desk to give me two free hands.
Bad command or file name. Bad, bad command! Sit! Stay! Staaaay...
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Finding the right motivation is definitely key.
If nothing else, how about you try contributing to an open source project? It'll give you the opportunity to try something new while at the same time contributing to something that others will benefit from. Just a thought... ![Java | [Coffee]](https://codeproject.freetls.fastly.net/script/Forums/Images/coffee.gif) 
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Is your pen not mightier than your sword? 
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Fantastic! Awesome!
If your actions inspire others to dream more, learn more, do more and become more, you are a leader.-John Q. Adams
You must accept one of two basic premises: Either we are alone in the universe, or we are not alone in the universe. And either way, the implications are staggering.-Wernher von Braun
Only two things are infinite, the universe and human stupidity, and I'm not sure about the former.-Albert Einstein
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Quote: Not only was the fuel eco-friendly, but it also smelled like bacon while driving.
Now here's a fuel I can get behind.
Motorcycle fueled by bacon grease [^]
It was broke, so I fixed it.
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Doesn't the smell makes you eat to often while driving? 
I'm not questioning your powers of observation; I'm merely remarking upon the paradox of asking a masked man who he is. (V)
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Only if you have bacon with you, other wise you would need to pull off the road to get some bacon, but by then the vehicle would be long gone. 
It was broke, so I fixed it.
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Q What do you call two crows?
A Attempted murder.
Did you ever see history portrayed as an old man with a wise brow and pulseless heart, waging all things in the balance of reason?
Is not rather the genius of history like an eternal, imploring maiden, full of fire, with a burning heart and flaming soul, humanly warm and humanly beautiful?
--Zachris Topelius
Training a telescope on one’s own belly button will only reveal lint. You like that? You go right on staring at it. I prefer looking at galaxies.
-- Sarah Hoyt
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This joke doesn't work.
There is no sense of irony to it.
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Attempted murder with the iron bar in the conservatory?
I wanna be a eunuchs developer! Pass me a bread knife!
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Now you're making progress.
Imagine the joke written more like this:
The exasperated husband sprinkled some bird food around his wife while she was napping in a lawn chair. When only two crows showed up he was arrested for attempted murder.
..or something like that.
Don't you think that is an improvement?
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I think I might be getting the idea.
Is it that two crows is a crowd, but three is murder?
If that's the case, then one must be company, but "one's company" doesn't make a lot of sense, unless you're talking about the war.
I wanna be a eunuchs developer! Pass me a bread knife!
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I'm going to pretend that made sense and excuse myself.
I need to go turn the light off in the restroom again.
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Someone was using my stall in the restroom.
I turned out the light and left.
I figure a few minutes of stumbling around in the dark with his pants around his ankles will teach him.
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And you had better hope he doesn't read this...
Bad command or file name. Bad, bad command! Sit! Stay! Staaaay...
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In the dark?
Not likely.
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MehGerbil wrote: Someone was using my stall in the restroom
Is that where they moved your work station to after your promotion? Cool, now you work in the reading room. 
It was broke, so I fixed it.
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I see you found the light switch.
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The only paper I could locate was the TPS report on your desk. 
It was broke, so I fixed it.
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It is pretty much a Lounge rule that the mention of a TPS report is an automatic upvote.
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I guess that means your post does as well. 
It was broke, so I fixed it.
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Thank you for protecting the integrity of the system.
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MehGerbil wrote: a few minutes of stumbling around in the dark with his pants around his ankles will teach him.
What if it was a her, and she was waiting for you?
I wanna be a eunuchs developer! Pass me a bread knife!
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Mark_Wallace wrote: What if it was a her, and she was waiting for you?
Then turning out the light won't have an effect since she's obviously blind.
Government is not reason; it is not eloquent; it is force. Like fire, it is a dangerous servant and a fearful master. ~ George Washington
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