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I had a similar conversation once where I did eventually have to fall back on:
"You're looking at this like buying a car or a shirt. That's not quite how this works, you'd be better off looking at it like buying a concept car where you've come up with the concept: no one can know what you want out of it without details and without details you can't make an estimate of costs. I can go buck wild and give you a hover car for example where what you actually wanted was a transforming submersible one."
Apparently this sank in and we finally got the details.
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You could do a slight trick on them; You make up the specifications, and given those ones, you estimated that is should cost about x amount of money. But make sure to be clear that changing the spec could massively alter the cost, so if the project spends more than estimated you could just tell them why its their own fault for not reading the spec properly. 
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Nothing you said is funny, because that is how it's actually done.
Especially if it's a government contract.
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John Simmons / outlaw programmer wrote: They don't want to establish a set of requirements until they know how much it's going to cost them.
Total and complete insanity.
Idiot: Can you give us an cost estimate on doing something?
Developer: $4.2 billion
Idiot: That sounds high.
Developer: Well, I could shave some of the work off. Let's say $3.5 billion.
Idiot: Wow, that's a huge cost savings. Thanks. You've won the contract.
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Sounds horribly familiar. I worked as a defense contractor through most of the 80's, when men were men, women were women, and contractors were like high-priced 'professional ladies' outside the harbor on payday.
My dissatisfaction with it was on the other end. Every time I finished a project it went down a black hole. We'd put 10-15 man-years of work into a project, it would be run for a couple of weeks and then put on a shelf. We met the terms of the contract and the customer was satisfied, but it was still disappointing.
Software Zen: delete this;
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I worked for almost a year on a project (on a different contract), and I was about 98% done with it when they had a change of command, and the new guys's priorities and agenda were different from his predecessor. Bye-bye project.
".45 ACP - because shooting twice is just silly" - JSOP, 2010
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You can never have too much ammo - unless you're swimming, or on fire. - JSOP, 2010
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When you pry the gun from my cold dead hands, be careful - the barrel will be very hot. - JSOP, 2013
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DoD[SOP]
Software Zen: delete this;
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One of the saddest sights I remember was when a project was canned shortly after deployment to production. When one of the developers expressed his disgust at the waste of a year of his work the manager said "Well you got paid didn't you". The developer decked him, the sad part, the developer was sacked.
Never underestimate the power of human stupidity
RAH
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My last project as a defense contractor was a simulation. I had worked on it for over a year when the company laid off our group, then hired me back as a contractor to finish the project. I delivered the simulation, which was then delivered to the Air Force. It was never used.
Software Zen: delete this;
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Kind of a spoiler in the old title there young feller me lad! 
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Just met someone else who doesn't know what a globe is either. It's a small world.
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ok, so what rock have you been living under ?
(I know at least two definitions, depending on context ...)
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(it was a joke - globe... it's a small world... Get it?)
".45 ACP - because shooting twice is just silly" - JSOP, 2010
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You can never have too much ammo - unless you're swimming, or on fire. - JSOP, 2010
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When you pry the gun from my cold dead hands, be careful - the barrel will be very hot. - JSOP, 2013
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Third rock from the sun of course... 
Anything that is unrelated to elephants is irrelephant
Anonymous
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The problem with quotes on the internet is that you can never tell if they're genuine
Winston Churchill, 1944
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I'd just like a chance to prove that money can't make me happy.
Me, all the time
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No need to be so theatrical.
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It's just a stage he's going through.
"These people looked deep within my soul and assigned me a number based on the order in which I joined."
- Homer
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This is Golden 
GCS d--- s-/++ a- C++++ U+++ P- L- E-- W++ N++ o+ K- w+++ O? M-- V? PS+ PE- Y+ PGP t++ 5? X R++ tv-- b+ DI+++ D++ G e++>+++ h--- ++>+++ y+++* Weapons extension: ma- k++ F+2 X
If you think 'goto' is evil, try writing an Assembly program without JMP. -- TNCaver
"When you have eliminated the JavaScript, whatever remains must be an empty page." -- Mike Hankey
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You're not that special. I dunno either.
Life is too shor
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Learn to code by playing games[^]
I've not looked too deeply, but looks like it could be a bit of fun.
Might introduce it at my CoderDojo on the weekend
PooperPig - Coming Soon
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My usual interview technique is to have a chat with the interviewee, very informal. Explain the job to them, talk about what they've done and generally have what I believe is known as "a discussion"
I am interviewing this week, and HR are telling me now that:
They need to be in the interview.
I have to ask a set of written-down questions "Where do you see yourself in 3 years" sort of stuff.
I need to give them a 'positive view of the company' including an overview of the structure (who owns what etc. rather than who's who's boss)
The person I am interviewing will report to me.
It was suggested that, if I couldn't make it at the time the interview was booked, that was fine they'd interview without me.
Has the world turned mad!
We are looking for a Test Analyst because our current single Test Analyst is trying to test thr output from about 16 developers - which is an impossible task, obviously.
So it was then suggested we could get a college leaver & the current Test Analyst could train them!
Oh, yes, in her copious spare time!
Yes; the world is indeed turned mad.
The single most important factor for anyone working in my team is that they fit into the team. Sure they also need the tech skills but fitting in is most important.
In a prev. company I used to do a 2nd 1/2 of the interview with the team - usually over coffee - where the prospective candidate (only the one's I thought would be a good fit) would chat to the team - who would tell them all about the job, the company, good bits and bad bits.
It was very successful - everyone had buy in on new recruits, the new recruits had a better idea of what they were getting into - and it proved very successful.
I suggested doing that in this company, and you'd have thought I'd suggested performing ritualistic disemboweling of a sheep on the boardroom table! "TALK!? to the TEAM?!"
Not sure how much more I can take!
PooperPig - Coming Soon
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Tell them to f*** off, then get me in as the Interviewee.
Michael Martin
Australia
"I controlled my laughter and simple said "No,I am very busy,so I can't write any code for you". The moment they heard this all the smiling face turned into a sad looking face and one of them farted. So I had to leave the place as soon as possible."
- Mr.Prakash One Fine Saturday. 24/04/2004
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I'd love to interview you with our HR department. Preferably during Wimbledon fortnight.
HR: Where do you see yourself in three years?
MM: How the Faaark would I know!? I'm not an elephanting psychic!
HR: Right, well thanks. erm... What are your strengths and weaknesses?
MM: Well, I can drink youse bastards under the table, any day of the faaarkin' week. Weaknesses? You callin' me a girly, love?
HR: Ha ha.. ha. Erm. Well. I, erm. Can you tell me about the time you dealt with conflict?
MM: There was this pooftah HR wanker asking stupid questions - punched 'im in the mouth... Hey! don't worry, love, I would't punch a girl... You *are* a girl, aren't you? with norgs like that I figured you must be - but with the 'tash it could go either way.
HR: <exit crying="">
PooperPig - Coming Soon
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Hilarious! Just have one question, though:
What the hell is
Maxxx wrote: 'tash
???
Anything that is unrelated to elephants is irrelephant
Anonymous
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The problem with quotes on the internet is that you can never tell if they're genuine
Winston Churchill, 1944
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I'd just like a chance to prove that money can't make me happy.
Me, all the time
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