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Some people have been clinically dead for a few minutes before coming back to life.
This is for them.
Undead people's lives matter!
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When I get the "we understand you've been injured in an accident that wasn't your fault" calls, I now always say "Yes I have" and you can hear the delight in their voices as they pass me on to their call centre in India. They usually then say something like "We think you can claim £3000 for your injuries". I then say I think that's a bit low considering the seriousness of the incident. "Why - what injuries did you suffer?" they ask. I then tell them that I was seriously decapitated and declared dead at the scene! Always gives me a laugh.
=========================================================
I'm an optoholic - my glass is always half full of vodka.
=========================================================
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In my last life I was James Dean*, so yes, I have.
*Have you ever noticed how people who claim to have lived before were always someone famous? Did anyone ever claim to have been Eric Smith, a farmer from somewhere near Darlington? Probably not, the reincarnationists were all way too busy being Henry VIII at the time.
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In my last life I was PeejayAdams, so yes, I have.
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What, you dunno time travelling? It's an anwserable question with both options valid!
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...and I'm already fed up with the italian rudeness. "thanks", "cheers", "good morning", "sorry", "excuse me" become expletives and insults. And everytime someone explains something he does it as if it completely obvious and you're a moron wasting his precious time - even if his job is precisely explaining what you're asking.
Queues become large unorganized graphs and PEOPLE PUSH. For heaven's sake if you push you only SLOW things down, we're not going faster... and the bus won't depart without you on board - usually at least.
Shopkeepers are rude and it looks like you're asking them a favour, beggars try to mug people and may follow for hundreds of meters, if someone offers free stuff you often fears he will grab your arm and start asking money; thid gives us italians a bad reputation abroad because we're often suspicious and "on our toes" so we seem rude while we're used to keep an eye on our belongings everytime a stranger initiates a conversation - it's a very common way to distract a person so that an accomplice may pickpocket the victim.
I was in London by the way.
GCS d--- s-/++ a- C++++ U+++ P- L- E-- W++ N++ o+ K- w+++ O? M-- V? PS+ PE- Y+ PGP t++ 5? X R++ tv-- b+ DI+++ D++ G e++>+++ h--- ++>+++ y+++* Weapons extension: ma- k++ F+2 X
If you think 'goto' is evil, try writing an Assembly program without JMP. -- TNCaver
When I was six, there were no ones and zeroes - only zeroes. And not all of them worked. -- Ravi Bhavnani
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My dear chap, the British know how to que! Have a tea and calm down. 
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Seriously, keeping a door open and being rewarded with a simple "cheers pal" instead of a shove aside is refreshing. Cashiers that politely ask if you're enjoying the stroll instead of grunting when paying, people asking if you would please make them sit on the bus instead of sending insults to "all these bad mannered slackers that do not get up to make them seat, they should really do something n their life, in their times it was UNACCEPTABLE blah blah" [I didn't put the swears and insults that usually go with it]...
From the number of posters advising not to assault people I can understand brits are in facts a wild bunch of hooligans kept together only by a strict politeness code. In Italy there are only hooligans, the politeness code is used as toilet paper.
GCS d--- s-/++ a- C++++ U+++ P- L- E-- W++ N++ o+ K- w+++ O? M-- V? PS+ PE- Y+ PGP t++ 5? X R++ tv-- b+ DI+++ D++ G e++>+++ h--- ++>+++ y+++* Weapons extension: ma- k++ F+2 X
If you think 'goto' is evil, try writing an Assembly program without JMP. -- TNCaver
When I was six, there were no ones and zeroes - only zeroes. And not all of them worked. -- Ravi Bhavnani
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A queue is what you make of it. 
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glennPattonWorking wrote: the British know how to que!
¿Qué?
"These people looked deep within my soul and assigned me a number based on the order in which I joined."
- Homer
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Queue, alright I can spell just not type good.
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No, you can type 'good', you just can't type well. 
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(He's from Barcelona)
I wanna be a eunuchs developer! Pass me a bread knife!
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It'd be quicker to train a monkey. 
"These people looked deep within my soul and assigned me a number based on the order in which I joined."
- Homer
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Or a Siberian hamster.
I wanna be a eunuchs developer! Pass me a bread knife!
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But not just any Siberian hamster - it has to be a filigree one!
"These people looked deep within my soul and assigned me a number based on the order in which I joined."
- Homer
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At least Italians do it fashionably.
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Not at all - one thing I noticed it's that the average italian look is that of an overgrown 7-years old or a hooker. The average brit has much more style than the average Italian, who looks like he/she's found the clothes in the garbage bin (despite spending awful amouts of money for poor quality stuff).
If dressed casual we look like dumb children, if dressed formally we look like we stole the clothes from the charity, if we try to have a certain style (like aggressive lady, sexy, metalhead) we look like kindergarteners trying to emulate what we saw from the adults. I could tell Italians from brits with a single look and I never missed.
Italian women usually wear several tons of make up and have skins ruined from tens of tanning beds so that at 30 they often look like 50-something.
GCS d--- s-/++ a- C++++ U+++ P- L- E-- W++ N++ o+ K- w+++ O? M-- V? PS+ PE- Y+ PGP t++ 5? X R++ tv-- b+ DI+++ D++ G e++>+++ h--- ++>+++ y+++* Weapons extension: ma- k++ F+2 X
If you think 'goto' is evil, try writing an Assembly program without JMP. -- TNCaver
When I was six, there were no ones and zeroes - only zeroes. And not all of them worked. -- Ravi Bhavnani
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Have to agree, Italy drove me crazy. Beautiful, great food, but the people are ridiculous. And don't get me started on the driving. For all the Swiss are a bit distant and like their space, they are at least mannerly. Oh, and competent.
"This new learning amazes me, Sir Bedivere. Explain to me again how sheep's bladders may be employed to prevent earthquakes"
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I don't know which city you drove in but when I went in central Italy (much arretrated with respect to the North) I risked my life at least every 5 minutes. Precedence rules? Speed limits? Dangerous overtakes? Wrong lane? Those were the least dangerous moments.
In Turin or Milan people actually drive better but the moment you get outside the city proper you're in constant danger.
GCS d--- s-/++ a- C++++ U+++ P- L- E-- W++ N++ o+ K- w+++ O? M-- V? PS+ PE- Y+ PGP t++ 5? X R++ tv-- b+ DI+++ D++ G e++>+++ h--- ++>+++ y+++* Weapons extension: ma- k++ F+2 X
If you think 'goto' is evil, try writing an Assembly program without JMP. -- TNCaver
When I was six, there were no ones and zeroes - only zeroes. And not all of them worked. -- Ravi Bhavnani
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The worst thing that happened in italy to me, several times, was while shopping when people randomly walk in front of you stopping in the middle of the corridor blocking everything 
Rules for the FOSW ![ ^]
if(this.signature != "")
{
MessageBox.Show("This is my signature: " + Environment.NewLine + signature);
}
else
{
MessageBox.Show("404-Signature not found");
}
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Always. And people standing still in the doorways / at the end of stairs. Sadly my girlfriend does that too... it's 10 years of me moving her from the middle of the passageways and being eaten alive afterwards.
And people not keeping the right on corridors and stairs, so if you're in a hurry you're stuck and will always be berated with a contemptuous "run, run..." as if you're an idiot to run, just take it easy, why would you run, for work? Pffft, you don't know how to live [... at the expense of the State and dignity, I might add]. Or being insulted because they have the right to stand still... they have, but out of the way. In fact since a couple of years I started shoving people away, there's no use in talking to an Italian.
GCS d--- s-/++ a- C++++ U+++ P- L- E-- W++ N++ o+ K- w+++ O? M-- V? PS+ PE- Y+ PGP t++ 5? X R++ tv-- b+ DI+++ D++ G e++>+++ h--- ++>+++ y+++* Weapons extension: ma- k++ F+2 X
If you think 'goto' is evil, try writing an Assembly program without JMP. -- TNCaver
When I was six, there were no ones and zeroes - only zeroes. And not all of them worked. -- Ravi Bhavnani
modified 11-Oct-16 10:24am.
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Next year i'll have that again when we go to italy to spend our holidays. But it's okay if it's only for 2 weeks 
den2k88 wrote: there's no use in talking to an Italian.
GCS d--- s-/+
I don't understand them at all 
Rules for the FOSW ![ ^]
if(this.signature != "")
{
MessageBox.Show("This is my signature: " + Environment.NewLine + signature);
}
else
{
MessageBox.Show("404-Signature not found");
}
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Italians DO IT better
All the rest doesn't count
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You're right, I'm just trying to find what is "IT". Due exception with food, probably the only good thing we have. and until some years ago worker rights, then Fornero arrived and elephanted us all.
No services, no politeness, no honesty, no pay, no rights. Transportation by public service is possibleonly in big cities with absurd delays and waiting times, transportation by car is extremely costly and the roads aren't maintained. National health service squanders money on acupuncture and has waiting times for urgent life-saving operation of 15+ months.
Crime is uncontrolled and the Police can't act, can't defend from assault and has no money for the gasoline so they can't patrol... despite us having TWO distinct Police corps + one dedicated mainly to financial felonies. If you defend your life in your home you get prosecuted and have to pay reparations to the assailant or its family. Clandestine immigration is not checked so we have thousand of nameless people in every city who often are criminals or turn to crime after having 0 possibilities (despite us natives having 0 possibilities either).
Engineers are paid peanuts for gold, public offices are corrupt and inefficient, our laws are as convolutd as possible in order to give as many getaways as possible to rich people, organized crime controls everything and it isn't rooted out.
We do IT better, just I still don't know WHAT. Except food. Eat to forget?
GCS d--- s-/++ a- C++++ U+++ P- L- E-- W++ N++ o+ K- w+++ O? M-- V? PS+ PE- Y+ PGP t++ 5? X R++ tv-- b+ DI+++ D++ G e++>+++ h--- ++>+++ y+++* Weapons extension: ma- k++ F+2 X
If you think 'goto' is evil, try writing an Assembly program without JMP. -- TNCaver
When I was six, there were no ones and zeroes - only zeroes. And not all of them worked. -- Ravi Bhavnani
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