WPF 4 datagrid working without WPF Toolkit in vb.net

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hi,
I recently started working on wpf.I am supposed to convert old application from .net 2.0 to WPF.Such industry used application always includes rich interaction with Grids.

When tried 3.5 i found out lack of Grid but Listview is used for that purpose.
So i move forward to 4.0 where datagrid is available.(which is far flexible than listview).

But even WPF is so much famous for its looks and graphical flexibility.
Columnheader of grid still found out to be separated from this graphical operation ,I wondered.

When i tried some trick of using Border control by myself but in vain.
Other Solution were suggesting WPFToolKit to change columnheaderstyle.(specially for gradient effect)

Can anybody help,how to bind data and apply gradient effect to column header of Datagrid without WPFToolKit???