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chriselst2-Jun-14 3:30

chriselst

2-Jun-14 3:30

Indeed it is.

Some men are born mediocre, some men achieve mediocrity, and some men have mediocrity thrust upon them.

Keith Barrow2-Jun-14 3:31

Keith Barrow

2-Jun-14 3:31

I didn't know a rider version of this joke, but I think I just figured one out. Laugh | :laugh:

PB 369,783 wrote:
I just find him very unlikeable, and I think the way he looks like a prettier version of his Mum is very disturbing.[^]

Chris Maunder2-Jun-14 3:33

Chris Maunder

2-Jun-14 3:33

Or stapled?

cheers
Chris Maunder

Nagy Vilmos2-Jun-14 3:37

Nagy Vilmos

2-Jun-14 3:37

I thought that was why did the dead koala stay in the tree?

"Up Votes" up for grabs!

CBadger2-Jun-14 2:38

2-Jun-14 2:38

In regards to the regular reappearance of jokes as pointed out in the previous post[Ð].

Who is brave enough to tell us a new joke. Roll eyes | :rolleyes:

Rules are as follows:
1) If the joke is put through a basic algorithm it should differ in wording etc more than 66% Laugh | :laugh:

2) Creativity (in any form) is mandatory! D'Oh! | :doh:

3) The judges (majority) ruling is final! $Shucks | :-\$

Now the judges is the opinionated (like myself) and wonderfully talented CP users. So anyone brave enough to take a risk of being ridiculed can win themselves some "up votes" for making an effort.

Let the games begin... Suspicious | :suss:

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Re: Likes up for grabs!

DaveAuld2-Jun-14 2:39

DaveAuld

2-Jun-14 2:39

See above...

Re: Likes up for grabs!

CBadger2-Jun-14 2:44

2-Jun-14 2:44

OWNED! Well done indeed! Lets see if the other (judges) agrees Laugh | :laugh:

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Rage2-Jun-14 2:44

2-Jun-14 2:44

We should mix the jokes, to add some punchlinecaching.com effect.

Example : change the below punch line from "What did the chicken" to "Where is the boat ?"

~RaGE();

I think words like 'destiny' are a way of trying to find order where none exists. - Christian Graus
Entropy isn't what it used to.

Rage2-Jun-14 2:55

2-Jun-14 2:55

We could adapt them to CP:

Mickael Martin received a parrot for his birthday, as this was a free gift for buying 500L of beer at once. The parrot was fully grown, with a very british attitude and the best vocabulary ever. Every sentence he spoke was almost poetry.
Martin tried to change the bird's attitude by constantly swearing, playing metal, showing Aussie TV shows...anything he could think of. Nothing worked. He yelled at the bird, and the bird got even nicer with him, thinking Martin needed help. Finally, in a moment of desperation, Martin put the parrot in the freezer.
For a few moments he heard the bird mildly protesting, then getting louder, and then, suddenly, he started swearing like a professional Detroit drug dealer who stepped bare foot on a lego brick.
Martin was delighted, and quickly opened the freezer door. The parrot almost tried to kill him, and said: "[Censored] Do not [Censored] do that again, you [Censored][Censored] of [Censored], [Censored]"
Martin was astounded at the changes in the bird's attitude and was about to ask what had changed him, when the parrot continued, "What the [Censored] did the [Censored] chicken do ?"

~RaGE();

I think words like 'destiny' are a way of trying to find order where none exists. - Christian Graus
Entropy isn't what it used to.

CBadger2-Jun-14 3:06

2-Jun-14 3:06

And so it starts

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User 592413-Jun-14 14:24

User 59241

3-Jun-14 14:24

You could improve the flow of this prose by leaving in all the sunshines and elephants.

Peter Wasser

"The whole problem with the world is that fools and fanatics are always so certain of themselves, and wiser people so full of doubts." - Bertrand Russell

Rage3-Jun-14 20:50

3-Jun-14 20:50

Damn right ! I am so not used to swearing that I did not think about it...

~RaGE();

I think words like 'destiny' are a way of trying to find order where none exists. - Christian Graus
Entropy isn't what it used to.

BillW332-Jun-14 3:03

BillW33

2-Jun-14 3:03

I noticed that actually being funny was not a part of your requirements. That is good, I am sure that many programmers here can write an algorithm to determine that their joke differs from others by >= 66% in wording. But, I doubt many can write an algorithm to determine how funny a joke is. Smile | :)

Just because the code works, it doesn't mean that it is good code.

CBadger2-Jun-14 3:07

2-Jun-14 3:07

prove it

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BillW332-Jun-14 3:18

BillW33

2-Jun-14 3:18

What I said was original, but not really funny.
Poke tongue | ;-P

Being original and funny is hard.

Just because the code works, it doesn't mean that it is good code.

CBadger2-Jun-14 3:50

2-Jun-14 3:50

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_Maxxx_3-Jun-14 1:38

_Maxxx_

3-Jun-14 1:38

I'd enter your competition, but I need to nip down to the paper shop.

It's a bit windy, so I need to put a brick on it.

CBadger4-Jun-14 4:31

4-Jun-14 4:31

Scissors.
Scissors cuts paper... I win D'Oh! | :doh:

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Parrot

Rajesh_Francis2-Jun-14 1:59

Rajesh_Francis

2-Jun-14 1:59

Bob received a parrot for his birthday. The parrot was fully grown, with a very bad attitude and worse vocabulary.
Every other word was an expletive; those that weren't expletives were, to say the least, rude.
Bob tried to change the bird's attitude by constantly saying polite words, playing soft music...anything he could think of.
Nothing worked. He yelled at the bird, and the bird got worse.
He shook the bird, and the bird got madder and more rude. Finally, in a moment of desperation, Bob put the parrot in the freezer.
For a few moments he heard the bird swearing, squawking, kicking and screaming and then, suddenly, there was absolute quiet.
Bob was frightened that he might have actually hurt the bird, and quickly opened the freezer door.
The parrot calmly stepped out onto Bob's extended arm and said,
"I'm sorry that I offended you with my language and my actions, and I ask your forgiveness. I will endeavor to correct my behavior".
Bob was astounded at the changes in the bird's attitude and was about to ask what had changed him,
when the parrot continued,
"May I ask what the Chicken did?"

DaveAuld2-Jun-14 2:22

DaveAuld

2-Jun-14 2:22

October 2011[^]

September 2009[^]

May 2007[^]

November 2002[^]

Thanks for adding another date to the list of appearances. Look forward to the next around 2016/2017. Roll eyes | :rolleyes:

Keith Barrow2-Jun-14 2:25

Keith Barrow

2-Jun-14 2:25

Ironic, when you consider a Parrot's reputation for repetition.

PB 369,783 wrote:
I just find him very unlikeable, and I think the way he looks like a prettier version of his Mum is very disturbing.[^]

Rage2-Jun-14 2:42

2-Jun-14 2:42

Don't get me started, I'd have to cut you in slices to keep you in the freezer.

~RaGE();

I think words like 'destiny' are a way of trying to find order where none exists. - Christian Graus
Entropy isn't what it used to.

Keith Barrow2-Jun-14 2:53

Keith Barrow

2-Jun-14 2:53

You also need a bigger freezer.

PB 369,783 wrote:
I just find him very unlikeable, and I think the way he looks like a prettier version of his Mum is very disturbing.[^]

Rage2-Jun-14 3:09

2-Jun-14 3:09

I can roll the slices.

Mmmmhh, burrito !

~RaGE();

I think words like 'destiny' are a way of trying to find order where none exists. - Christian Graus
Entropy isn't what it used to.