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There *has* to be some way of writing some dynamic HTML to check and see what forum you are in, and based on that, put in an appropriate signature. 
Even a broken clock is right twice a day.
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Paul, you're a programmer, not a politician. It's not your job to worry about whether or not you're offending people. That's the job of people you are offending. At the point at which they notify you of their revulsion, you politely tell them to lick your back-door breakmaker.
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"...the staggering layers of obscenity in your statement make it a work of art on so many levels." - Jason Jystad, 10/26/2001
Please review the Legal Disclaimer in my bio.
------- signature ends
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John Simmons / outlaw programmer wrote:
Trying to tell a programmer *how* to do something is like trying to herd cats. You'd have a better chance at convincing a female employee that licking her nipples really is part of the company's standard drug testing procedure.
ROTFLMAO 
Regards,
Brian Dela 
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John Simmons / outlaw programmer wrote:
You'd have a better chance at convincing a female employee that licking her nipples really is part of the company's standard drug testing procedure.
And how did that work out for you, John ? :P
Christian
No offense, but I don't really want to encourage the creation of another VB developer. - Larry Antram 22 Oct 2002
C# will attract all comers, where VB is for IT Journalists and managers - Michael P Butler 05-12-2002
Again, you can screw up a C/C++ program just as easily as a VB program. OK, maybe not as easily, but it's certainly doable. - Jamie Nordmeyer - 15-Nov-2002
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... large-breasted hard-bodied secretaries that just drop by to chat (and provide the occasional underwear modelling session).
Manager: "How long will that project take you, John?"
John: "Probably the better part of a week."
Manager: "Tell you what - if you finish it before Friday, I'll send Miss Goodbody in here to chat and maybe model some underwear."
... fifteen minutes later...
John: "It's coded and tested, and added to version control."
Manager speaks into intercom: "Miss Goodbody, what are you wearing today?"
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"...the staggering layers of obscenity in your statement make it a work of art on so many levels." - Jason Jystad, 10/26/2001
Please review the Legal Disclaimer in my bio.
------- signature ends
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Is your company hiring, John? You sound like a master of motivation!
"My child was Inmate of the Month at Mohave County Jail" - Bumper Sticker in Bullhead City, AZ
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Master<something>, anyway... 
Software Zen: delete this;
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What you and I call "motivation" is commonly referred to as "sexual harrassment" by the rest of corporate America. They have no sense of humor anymore.
Every company should be required to have and fill a "floosie" position, to be filled by a young large-breasted hard-body that actually likes to dress provacatively at work and show off her, umm, assets at the drop of a hat...
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"...the staggering layers of obscenity in your statement make it a work of art on so many levels." - Jason Jystad, 10/26/2001
Please review the Legal Disclaimer in my bio.
------- signature ends
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So true!
Long before the PC era I had the luxury of hiring one... Stuck on a doomed project in a doomed company (it has since expired), it was impossible to get around the retired-in-place lifers managers who had to sign off and object to everything. One beautiful lady brilliantly schmoozed her way into the hearts of these miserable empire builders and made the paper flow! And armed with a fat checkbook and a '78 Pinto, she cruised the hundreds of electronics dealers in Orange county, CA, buying MIL-SPEC parts by the ones and twos, filling the production parts kits 18 months sooner than Purchasing could!
Wherever you are, Theresa, bless you! You saved my project...
"My child was Inmate of the Month at Mohave County Jail" - Bumper Sticker in Bullhead City, AZ
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Don't tell me you want the secretary position. 
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Certainly not!
But if had my druthers, I'd happily work for a company that ran by John's ideas about reality - any day! He's a surly, rude bastard at times, but some times demand that sort of reponse, and too many managers are afraid to go there. I despise wimps and politically correct pansies - and any company John would be willing to work for I have to assume would be short of pansies.
"My child was Inmate of the Month at Mohave County Jail" - Bumper Sticker in Bullhead City, AZ
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Black Cat wrote:
Don't tell me you want the secretary position.
Roger Wright wrote:
Certainly not!
But if had my druthers, I'd happily work for a company that ran by John's ideas about reality - any day!
I was actually joking about you applying for the position of the large-breasted hard-bodied secretary.
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John Simmons / outlaw programmer wrote:
maybe model some underwear
 Hmmm, I don't know about you guys, but I am not that interested in female underwear - I think I would look funny wearing it.
![Beer | [beer]](https://codeproject.global.ssl.fastly.net/script/Forums/Images/beer.gif)
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...good coffee, with no cockroachs in it. 
Mauricio Ritter - Brazil
Sonorking now: 100.13560 MRitter
"Th@ langwagje is screwed! It has if's but no end if's!! Stupid php cant even do butuns on forms! VISHAUL BASICS ARE THE FUTSHURE!" - Simon Walton
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Mauricio Ritter wrote:
...good coffee, with no cockroachs in it.
When you order coffee in Sweden, you have to ask for the cockroaches. If it's the other way around where you live, you should consider switching coffee bar/shop.
--
This space for rent.
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I know some people who would give up good coffee and big TFT monitors if they could stop programming Lotus Notes 
I see dumb people
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Daniel Turini wrote:
I see dumb people
ROTFLMAO.
cheers,
Chris Maunder
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What is the beverage of choice for coding sessions? Mine in Mt. Dew, I hate coffee
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Mark Nischalke wrote:
What is the beverage of choice for coding sessions?
Pepermint Tea or Cappuccio
Regards,
Brian Dela
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For me, it's plain old water. For the simple reason that if (when) I spill it all over my desk, I can just turn things off and nothing gets permenantly damaged or stained.
Even a broken clock is right twice a day.
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Its got to be Tea - pots of it.
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I agree - you can spot my answer amongst the "other" answers
--
Help me! I'm turning into a grapefruit!
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jolt cola!
well, normally it's water, but if I want to be awake whilst working, I'd prefer jolt.
there is no sig!
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On the clock  : start with a white chocolate mocha, day ends productively.
Off the clock  : start with a six-pack of Coors Original, things get a little usufructory, dissatisfactory, and I begin to cuss at my computer.
Seriously, there must be a happy medium between caffiene and alcohol? 
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