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A lawyer boarded an airplane in New Orleans with a box of frozen crabs and asked a blonde flight attendant take care of them for him. She took the box and promised to put it in the crew's refrigerator. He advised her that he was holding her personally responsible for them staying frozen, mentioning in an arrogant manner that he was a lawyer, and threatened what would happen to her if she let them thaw out.
Shortly before landing in New York , she used the intercom to announce to the entire cabin, "Would the lawyer who gave me the crabs in New Orleans , please raise your hand?"
Not one hand went up .... so she took them home and ate them.
There are two lessons here:
1. Lawyers aren't as smart as they think they are .
2. Blondes aren't as dumb as most folks think.
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Oh boy! A Double Nielsen!
- I would love to change the world, but they won’t give me the source code.
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What's more, the current poster is one of the OPs. 
/ravi
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Wonder if he's blond?
New version: WinHeist Version 2.1.0 Beta
Have you ever just looked at someone and knew the wheel was turning but the hamster was dead?
Trying to understand the behavior of some people is like trying to smell the color 9.
I'm not crazy, my reality is just different than yours!
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He believes in recycling.
You looking for sympathy?
You'll find it in the dictionary, between sympathomimetic and sympatric
(Page 1788, if it helps)
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Q. How do you get a blond on the roof?
A. Tell her free drinks on the house.
.'\ /`.
.'.-.`-'.-.`.
..._: .-. .-. :_...
.' '-.(o ) (o ).-' `.
: _ _ _`~(_)~`_ _ _ :
: /: ' .-=_ _=-. ` ;\ :
: :|-.._ ' ` _..-|: :
: `:| |`:-:-.-:-:'| |:' :
`. `.| | | | | | |.' .'
`. `-:_| | |_:-' .'
`-._ ```` _.-'
``-------'/xml>
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If we're doing favorite blonde reposts...
How do you drown a blonde?
Put a scratch and sniff sticker at the bottom of a pool.
There are only 10 types of people in the world, those who understand binary and those who don't.
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Q: What do you call a fly buzzing inside a blonde's head?
A: A Space Invader.
New version: WinHeist Version 2.1.0 Beta
Have you ever just looked at someone and knew the wheel was turning but the hamster was dead?
Trying to understand the behavior of some people is like trying to smell the color 9.
I'm not crazy, my reality is just different than yours!
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A man wanted to get his beautiful blonde wife Barbi something nice fro her birthday, so he decided to get her the latest iPhone.
She was very excited. She loved her phone! He showed her all the features, explained how to use it - no problems.
The next day, Barbi went shopping. Her phone rang and it was her husband.
"Hi Honey!" He said. "How do you like your new phone?"
"I just love it!" she replied. "It's so small, and easy to use, and I can hear your voice as clear as a bell."
"But there's one thing I don't understand." She continued.
"How did you know I was at Wal-Mart?"
You looking for sympathy?
You'll find it in the dictionary, between sympathomimetic and sympatric
(Page 1788, if it helps)
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Nobody at Luton would identify soap as suspicious.
Heck, nobody at Luton would identify soap as anything!
You looking for sympathy?
You'll find it in the dictionary, between sympathomimetic and sympatric
(Page 1788, if it helps)
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#1 - same as OG
#2 - Work? In Luton?
#3 - :drinksCopiousQuantitiesOfMindBleach:
Maybe it's the Lorraine Chase Diction Award?
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Nagy Vilmos wrote: drinksCopiousQuantitiesOfMindBleach
I think the correct response to option 3 is to drink copious quantities of actual bleach.
DD doesn't seem to me much in evidence here recently.
Alberto Brandolini: The amount of energy necessary to refute bullshit is an order of magnitude bigger than to produce it.
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He's been on hols the last week, expect renewed drivel in the near future.
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Nagy Vilmos wrote: He's been on hols the last week,
Hence leaving his sweaty gimp suit at the airport.
Some men are born mediocre, some men achieve mediocrity, and some men have mediocrity thrust upon them.
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They've killed the package. No word yet on what it was.
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Not confirmed yet, but sources say it may have been .. (dramatic suspense) .. curling irons.
This may have been the best use of curling irons ever.
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It says this:
"Police ordered that hundreds of passengers and staff leave the terminal building for their own safety as officers investigated the package.
All incoming flights to the airport were suspended and the approach road to the airport was closed."
Then, one sentence later, it says this:
"The decision was expected to have an immediate effect on flights leaving and arriving at the airport."
When did the Telegraph start writing for US consumption?
(I won't bother to mention that it should have read "leaving from and arriving at the airport")
I wanna be a eunuchs developer! Pass me a bread knife!
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(Thanks to Countdown)
BLATHERSKITE[^]
Now, we don't have any of them here, do we? (Myself excepted, of course)
You looking for sympathy?
You'll find it in the dictionary, between sympathomimetic and sympatric
(Page 1788, if it helps)
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There are two of them having a noisy disagreement in the office right now who are hurtling towards a damn good shoeing.
Some men are born mediocre, some men achieve mediocrity, and some men have mediocrity thrust upon them.
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Keep the noise down I'm trying to work. 
New version: WinHeist Version 2.1.0 Beta
Have you ever just looked at someone and knew the wheel was turning but the hamster was dead?
Trying to understand the behavior of some people is like trying to smell the color 9.
I'm not crazy, my reality is just different than yours!
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I'm not sure I believe that.
Some men are born mediocre, some men achieve mediocrity, and some men have mediocrity thrust upon them.
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I really am working on an article I've been asked to write for one of the applications I've created but am listening to Alan Parsons right now so oblivious to the noise.
New version: WinHeist Version 2.1.0 Beta
Have you ever just looked at someone and knew the wheel was turning but the hamster was dead?
Trying to understand the behavior of some people is like trying to smell the color 9.
I'm not crazy, my reality is just different than yours!
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