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Ivy Tech has super slow internet, as the proxy systems go from Lafayette to Indianapolis to who-knows-where-else then back to Lafayette. Even for accessing things on the Campus network from the Campus. Round trip time is measured in minutes on a good day, hours on a bad one.
What do you get when you cross a joke with a rhetorical question?
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The metaphorical solid rear-end expulsions have impacted the metaphorical motorized bladed rotating air movement mechanism.
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Do questions with multiple question marks annoy you???
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FROM: Brandy
TO: Me
Subject: Hello Mr Dependable!!
I am Tanya and I am in search of my personal Mr. Dependable? Are you one? Well I hope that you are. Most girls are in search of one.
It is very important for us girls to have someone who is there for you in any situation in life.
I am from Russia and here girls love to have someone who cares, loves and pampers you so that they feel secure and blessed.
Russian girls know to be the loved ones, we understand men to the core and we love to make a man feel satisfied in every aspect of family life.
If you long to find someone among us or maybe you want to find me itself, join this site where I have registered myself in search of my Mr. Dependable.
[site omitted for obvious reasons]
I simply gotta stop visiting those pron sites...
".45 ACP - because shooting twice is just silly" - JSOP, 2010
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You can never have too much ammo - unless you're swimming, or on fire. - JSOP, 2010
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When you pry the gun from my cold dead hands, be careful - the barrel will be very hot. - JSOP, 2013
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This day is the day! I got one too... 
Skipper: We'll fix it.
Alex: Fix it? How you gonna fix this?
Skipper: Grit, spit and a whole lotta duct tape.
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Clearly, you and JSOP are visiting the same sites... 
Bad command or file name. Bad, bad command! Sit! Stay! Staaaay...
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For sure not - I got that email at work!!! 
Skipper: We'll fix it.
Alex: Fix it? How you gonna fix this?
Skipper: Grit, spit and a whole lotta duct tape.
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Or one of them goes by the alias "Brandy." 
"One man's wage rise is another man's price increase." - Harold Wilson
"Fireproof doesn't mean the fire will never come. It means when the fire comes that you will be able to withstand it." - Michael Simmons
"You can easily judge the character of a man by how he treats those who can do nothing for him." - James D. Miles
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Just been deleting today's spam, I got one too.
Some men are born mediocre, some men achieve mediocrity, and some men have mediocrity thrust upon them.
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John Simmons / outlaw programmer wrote: Subject: Hello Mr Dependable!!
Mr. Dependable...
Aren't those adult diapers?
I'd rather be phishing!
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Hmmmmm... Depends.
Will Rogers never met me.
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Which one is it? Brandy or Tanya?
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Need to know which one to pay the bonus to?
I wanna be a eunuchs developer! Pass me a bread knife!
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Either way they are both Russian sounding names. I'd believe the email. 
Jack of all trades, master of none, though often times better than master of one.
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John Simmons / outlaw programmer wrote: If you long to find someone among us or maybe you want to find me itself
Hmm... and here I thought all those dooms day predictions about AI taking over the world were bogus...
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Emmm... Google Translator, you know
M.D.V. 
If something has a solution... Why do we have to worry about?. If it has no solution... For what reason do we have to worry about?
Help me to understand what I'm saying, and I'll explain it better to you
Rating helpful answers is nice, but saying thanks can be even nicer.
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Sure... that is what itself wants you to think...
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SkyNetski?
Bad command or file name. Bad, bad command! Sit! Stay! Staaaay...
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I think they spelled dispensable wrong.
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I long to find someone among them and find them itself. 
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John Simmons / outlaw programmer wrote: I simply gotta stop visiting those pron sites...
That's just silly. Just simply stop leaving your email address (whatever they promise don't you believe it!)...
My blog[ ^]
public class SanderRossel : Lazy<Person>
{
public void DoWork()
{
throw new NotSupportedException();
}
}
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Me too! Who knew we were all so dependable?
According to my calculations, I should be able to retire about 5 years after I die.
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John Simmons / outlaw programmer wrote: I simply gotta stop visiting those pron sites...
pr0n sites? I thought these emails were coming from MSDN!
Will Rogers never met me.
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I have a shared inbox with the wife, I use a different browser and email account for my entertainment browsing!
Never underestimate the power of human stupidity
RAH
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John Simmons / outlaw programmer wrote: I simply gotta stop visiting those pron sites...
The only way that will happen is if you start living with a pron star.
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