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The real problem with talking machines in France is whether to use the formal or informal personal pronoun (tu or vous) when dealing with them.
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We have the same 'problem' here. I usually go by a racist joke, which I can't tell here. Anyway, it's a witless machine. No need to get formal since you can't possibly hurt its feelings. 
The language is JavaScript. that of Mordor, which I will not utter here
This is Javascript. If you put big wheels and a racing stripe on a golf cart, it's still a f***ing golf cart.
"I don't know, extraterrestrial?"
"You mean like from space?"
"No, from Canada."
If software development were a circus, we would all be the clowns.
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That's also what I say to the little TVs in hardware stores, when they start prattling on about their great, new, useless cr@p tools that will be used once, to try out, and then never see the light of day again.
I wanna be a eunuchs developer! Pass me a bread knife!
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I guess "Casse toi pauvre con" has two meanings in this sort of situation.
“That which can be asserted without evidence, can be dismissed without evidence.”
― Christopher Hitchens
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This has kept coming back into my head, today, because (and I know you've translated it) my response is always precisely "Shut the f*** up!", out loud, no matter how may bus-loads of infant-school children are standing within earshot.
Maybe there's hope for anglo-franckicle relationships yet, as we appear to have a shared hatred for marketing morons.
I wanna be a eunuchs developer! Pass me a bread knife!
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That gets on my nerves at Tesco etc. when you use the stupid self-scan checkouts.
Just shut up.
SHUT UP.
DOES THIS PLACE SELL LARGE HAMMERS?
Bad command or file name. Bad, bad command! Sit! Stay! Staaaay...
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You're a f*!#@$ng bagging-area - how "unexpected" can my item be?! 
"These people looked deep within my soul and assigned me a number based on the order in which I joined."
- Homer
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don't know about that, I was in safeways last week and one of the till was repeating that, the women using the till was fuming at it whilst her small child was sat on the bagging area! at least I assume it was her child and not one she had just bought
You cant outrun the world, but there is no harm in getting a head start
Real stupidity beats artificial intelligence every time.
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I hate those, "you are reaching the end of the escalator please step off" electronic messages, if I reach the end of course I am stepping off what the heel else can I do?
You cant outrun the world, but there is no harm in getting a head start
Real stupidity beats artificial intelligence every time.
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Run on the spot.
Bad command or file name. Bad, bad command! Sit! Stay! Staaaay...
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they don't let me take Spot into the shop I have to tie him up outside
You cant outrun the world, but there is no harm in getting a head start
Real stupidity beats artificial intelligence every time.
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Sunglasses: they'll think Spot is a Guide Cat.
Bad command or file name. Bad, bad command! Sit! Stay! Staaaay...
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Collected works consist of a worker and, within the blessed, the million point man's initials (9)
Some men are born mediocre, some men achieve mediocrity, and some men have mediocrity thrust upon them.
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Anthology
Collected works are an anthology
Worker : Ant
Blessed : Holy
The million point man : OriginalGriff
OriginalGriff initials : OG
Within Blessed HolOGy
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Yes, I was worried the first two words would give it away.
Some men are born mediocre, some men achieve mediocrity, and some men have mediocrity thrust upon them.
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I actually worked the clue backwards - as soon as I saw the million points mans initials I knew that OG had to be in there. I'd skim read the question and picked up worker and OG before I took in the rest of the clue.
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That makes me feel better then, it was a proper clue rather than just a definition, even if an easy one.
Some men are born mediocre, some men achieve mediocrity, and some men have mediocrity thrust upon them.
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The downside is that this means I'm up for tomorrow. 
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Except..."OG" is not my initials... 
OriginalGriff is (technically) one word, and my given name is not "Original" (Or "Griff", strictly speaking)
Bad command or file name. Bad, bad command! Sit! Stay! Staaaay...
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Yeah I know, but you do get referred to as OG, I considered something to do with Pascal Case but dismissed it is too awkward.
Conveying meaning is more important than accuracy.
Or something.
Some men are born mediocre, some men achieve mediocrity, and some men have mediocrity thrust upon them.
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If he'd gone with short "venerated sheep worrier" you'd have been offended though. 
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Indeed I would.
Nobody describes me as "venerated" and gets away with it! 
Bad command or file name. Bad, bad command! Sit! Stay! Staaaay...
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OriginalGriff wrote: Nobody describes me as "venerated"
Not since you took those pills the vet gave you anyway.
Some men are born mediocre, some men achieve mediocrity, and some men have mediocrity thrust upon them.
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Movie Quote Of The Day
Have no fear, little one... I am here to protect thee.
Which movie?
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Aliens Versus Teletubbies
Bad command or file name. Bad, bad command! Sit! Stay! Staaaay...
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