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My wise old father told me that there are events in life where a man should step back and let others play the main role. Executions, weddings...
So, my personal outfit for a wedding is anything that helps me to run faster.
I have lived with several Zen masters - all of them were cats.
His last invention was an evil Lasagna. It didn't kill anyone, and it actually tasted pretty good.
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Sander Rossel wrote: Not being an inconsiderate a**hole is not the same as walking on eggshells (at least I hope so) 
I hope so for you too. But what will you do when Madam comes home with a new dress, makeup and hairstyle (all in garish colors) that remind you of a circus clown? Try to bring her back to her senses? Or better play along and live with your clown? I would not, despite knowing how well that will go. Don't ask me if you don#t want to hear my honest opinion. At least I'm sneaky enough to save the circus clown as ammunition for the drama that is sure to follow.
I have lived with several Zen masters - all of them were cats.
His last invention was an evil Lasagna. It didn't kill anyone, and it actually tasted pretty good.
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I'd probably tell her it's not really my taste, but that she looks beautiful anyway, and that she should get it off so we can get it on 
Now turn it around, you come home from whatever and there's your lovely wife/girlfriend cheering you on.
If whatever you did was a success she can reward you handsomely, but if whatever you did was a failure she'll be there to comfort you (and somehow those are the same thing)
And yes, there's the occasional fight, but those should be rare.
And making up is just the more pleasant
At least that's how I think a relationship should be like (and unfortunately, mine weren't all like that).
Now I've decided that I'd rather be alone than with the wrong person, but rather with the right person than be alone.
Lots of people are rather miserable together than happy alone though, which is what gives marriage such a bad name.
For the record, I don't believe in marriage.
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Sander Rossel wrote: Now I've decided that I'd rather be alone than with the wrong person, but rather with the right person than be alone.
Sounds good. Just dont waste too much time desperately looking for that unicorn.
I have lived with several Zen masters - all of them were cats.
His last invention was an evil Lasagna. It didn't kill anyone, and it actually tasted pretty good.
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Marriage is an honorable institution, just don't want to live in an institution!
Got my site back up after my time in the woods!
JaxCoder.com
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...It made me laugh, anyway: Lifeguard[^]
Sent from my Amstrad PC 1640
Never throw anything away, Griff
Bad command or file name. Bad, bad command! Sit! Stay! Staaaay...
AntiTwitter: @DalekDave is now a follower!
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well you must realise cats have skills beyond our perception:
I remember one neighborhood fluffy white as [clean] snow Persian cat that had no trouble catching birds, it'd low-creep up to them the way any other cat would. I know birds are tiny brained and key on movement, but you'd think a bright white thing getting closer warrants a longer look.
I reckon that Persian did in more sparrows and starlings than the rest of the cats put together.
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Some of 'em are just really good at it.
The neighbours bird feeder has a sign: "McDijalds" as Dij* treats it as a source of McNuggets ...
* Our cat: Named "Dij" as "short for Digital" because as a Kitten he was ON (and doing a Wall of Death round the room) or OFF (and you could have plucked his whiskers and he wouldn't have noticed)
Sent from my Amstrad PC 1640
Never throw anything away, Griff
Bad command or file name. Bad, bad command! Sit! Stay! Staaaay...
AntiTwitter: @DalekDave is now a follower!
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Whats there to laugh about? This is serious business. A neighbor had a bigger bird house on a pole in his garden. The sort that is basically only a platform with a roof on top and open at both ends. The pole and the 'cat climbing protection' were no obstacle for our little ninja. She simply jumped right into the bird house and paitiently waited inside for the birds. Actually not such a dumb idea. The only flaw was that long striped tail hanging out of one end of the bird house.
This went on for quite a while. The neighbor, an elderly and otherwise quiet man, got really excited when he saw what little bird was sitting in his bird house. Another neighbor's boy tried to shoot the poor cat with an air rifle, but could not get her while she was running for cover. No use. Kittie just adjusted her timing and came back when she thought that nobody would see her. It finally ended with the bird house falling off the pole, cat and all.
It's another story what happened when more than ten years later another neighbor decided to build a cage for his prized doves behind the house. Fortunately he never quite found out who paid the doves a visit almost every night.
I have lived with several Zen masters - all of them were cats.
His last invention was an evil Lasagna. It didn't kill anyone, and it actually tasted pretty good.
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Yeah, we had one that loved fish. So she'd come home, and dump a dead Koi on the carpet. We never did find out whose pond she was raiding (and thankfully they never found out whose cat was so busy).
Sent from my Amstrad PC 1640
Never throw anything away, Griff
Bad command or file name. Bad, bad command! Sit! Stay! Staaaay...
AntiTwitter: @DalekDave is now a follower!
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Did you ever see a cat that did not love fish? Actually surprising for an animal that is perfectly adapted to live in the north African desert, hates to get wet and can even resort to drink salt water if it must.
I have lived with several Zen masters - all of them were cats.
His last invention was an evil Lasagna. It didn't kill anyone, and it actually tasted pretty good.
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I know what you mean, she hated getting wet, but loved hunting fish, and adored prawns - try to eat them yourself and she'd yell at you until you gave her some.
Strange cat, she only ever washed herself when we locked her in for a week over fireworks night, and most of the time was a suspicious yellow and grey. At the end of a week imprisoned she was sparkly white and grey, for a while.
Also kidnapped other smaller cats and dragged them home to nurse whether they liked it or not. 
Sent from my Amstrad PC 1640
Never throw anything away, Griff
Bad command or file name. Bad, bad command! Sit! Stay! Staaaay...
AntiTwitter: @DalekDave is now a follower!
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OriginalGriff wrote: Strange cat, she only ever washed herself when we locked her in for a week over fireworks night, and most of the time was a suspicious yellow and grey. At the end of a week imprisoned she was sparkly white and grey, for a while.
When cats stop to clean themselves they have a serious problem. It was probably more like she always kept clean, but enjoyed a regular 'dust bath' somewhere outside. Natural flea powder.
OriginalGriff wrote: Also kidnapped other smaller cats and dragged them home to nurse whether they liked it or not.
Alpha cat. If you had let her, she would have been the mom of a whole pack of daughters and selected and approved males, kept them all in line and taken care of all of them, including loads of kittens.
I have lived with several Zen masters - all of them were cats.
His last invention was an evil Lasagna. It didn't kill anyone, and it actually tasted pretty good.
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As much as I love cats, I do have one myself, they're a disaster for the global ecosystem, killing of birds, mice and other small animals in numbers you wouldn't believe[^].
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They do good work, keeping bird and rodent numbers down and encouraging the survivors to be more observant!
That said, they are the only creature where a single individual - Tibbles - has killed an entire species all on his own: The Obituary of the Stephens Island Wren | All About Birds[^]
Sent from my Amstrad PC 1640
Never throw anything away, Griff
Bad command or file name. Bad, bad command! Sit! Stay! Staaaay...
AntiTwitter: @DalekDave is now a follower!
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The true disaster for any ecosystem is a certain sort of monkey that has taken over the entire planet. Cats, rodents and a number of other species have simply adapted and do their best to profit from this success. As long as it lasts.
I have lived with several Zen masters - all of them were cats.
His last invention was an evil Lasagna. It didn't kill anyone, and it actually tasted pretty good.
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just incase u are using windows 10/edge etc and forgot to turn off send all my data to cloud this should be a reminder
Privacy – Microsoft privacy[^]
Caveat Emptor.
"Progress doesn't come from early risers – progress is made by lazy men looking for easier ways to do things." Lazarus Long
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tl;dr did you actually read all that or just post it because it is probably corporate drivel and you don't like us.
Never underestimate the power of human stupidity -
RAH
I'm old. I know stuff - JSOP
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50. Insect piano sound? (4)
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Beep ?
We can’t stop here, this is bat country - Hunter S Thompson RIP
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Ya 
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Oh, well done - I was nowhere near...
Sent from my Amstrad PC 1640
Never throw anything away, Griff
Bad command or file name. Bad, bad command! Sit! Stay! Staaaay...
AntiTwitter: @DalekDave is now a follower!
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... and I see no tangible reason it should have received any Academy Award nominations.
".45 ACP - because shooting twice is just silly" - JSOP, 2010
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You can never have too much ammo - unless you're swimming, or on fire. - JSOP, 2010
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When you pry the gun from my cold dead hands, be careful - the barrel will be very hot. - JSOP, 2013
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Other than conspiracies, I suspect it was the same reason they nominated Return of the King. Sometimes they just nominate a movie because it's at the end of a long stretch of work. A "here's for everything but not this" award.
TTFN - Kent
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oscars: self back patting and minorities' appeasement; absolutely nothing to do with movies.
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