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For discussing anything related to a software developer's life but is not for programming questions. Got a programming question?

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GeneralDo programmers have a life? Because I feel like I don't have a life anymore Pin
User 1493685315-Feb-21 19:41
User 1493685315-Feb-21 19:41 
GeneralRe: Do programmers have a life? Because I feel like I don't have a life anymore PinPopular
Nelek15-Feb-21 20:39
protectorNelek15-Feb-21 20:39 
GeneralRe: Do programmers have a life? Because I feel like I don't have a life anymore Pin
User 1493685316-Feb-21 10:35
User 1493685316-Feb-21 10:35 
GeneralRe: Do programmers have a life? Because I feel like I don't have a life anymore Pin
Super Lloyd15-Feb-21 20:39
Super Lloyd15-Feb-21 20:39 
GeneralRe: Do programmers have a life? Because I feel like I don't have a life anymore Pin
User 1493685316-Feb-21 10:27
User 1493685316-Feb-21 10:27 
GeneralRe: Do programmers have a life? Because I feel like I don't have a life anymore Pin
DerekT-P16-Feb-21 0:19
professionalDerekT-P16-Feb-21 0:19 
GeneralRe: Do programmers have a life? Because I feel like I don't have a life anymore Pin
User 1493685316-Feb-21 10:18
User 1493685316-Feb-21 10:18 
GeneralRe: Do programmers have a life? Because I feel like I don't have a life anymore Pin
honey the codewitch16-Feb-21 0:40
mvahoney the codewitch16-Feb-21 0:40 
First of all, software is competitive. My husband is in nursing school and its even more competitive than that. Some fields are just like that - you either have to be hungry for it, or it will eat you instead.

Second, and this is personal - not universal - but I don't know how far someone can get either in this field or in another highly competitive field if they don't love doing it. If you feel trapped is it just because you're currently overwhelmed or is it because you're not enjoying the craft? Sort that question out for yourself. Figure out the "why" of you feeling trapped, because the why is so important here.


It seems like - based on my takeaway - that you the love the craft, but your current situation is overwhelming you. My suggestion is - if the stress is making you sick try to reorganize what's left of your life to give you some downtime, and if that isn't working or possible, maybe get a therapist, but do whatever you must to tough it out *and* take care of yourself at the same time. Life gets hard, but that makes us or breaks us. Don't let it break you, or force you into making choices you'll regret later. And don't be afraid to ask for help if you need it.

Also don't be afraid to act decisively - if you need to get out of the field - even if only for awhile, get out. I have. But don't act from a place of fear or anger and you're less likely to regret the decision.

Don't worry so much about social isolation. Your formative years are mostly behind you. If you already were socially awkward (welcome to our club! Laugh | :laugh: ) you're going to stay that way, and if you weren't, software won't change that. I've known a few extremely sociable developers in the field. The extroverted ones are less common, but the field doesn't turn them into social rejects. They usually wind up being the de facto liason between the software team and management, and because of that can often find themselves becoming lead devs, and sometimes even CTOs (and awesome CTOs at that, in my experience)


Just my $0.02
Real programmers use butterflies

GeneralRe: Do programmers have a life? Because I feel like I don't have a life anymore Pin
User 1493685316-Feb-21 9:48
User 1493685316-Feb-21 9:48 
GeneralRe: Do programmers have a life? Because I feel like I don't have a life anymore Pin
Maximilien16-Feb-21 2:21
Maximilien16-Feb-21 2:21 
GeneralRe: Do programmers have a life? Because I feel like I don't have a life anymore Pin
User 1493685316-Feb-21 9:15
User 1493685316-Feb-21 9:15 
GeneralRe: Do programmers have a life? Because I feel like I don't have a life anymore Pin
Nelek16-Feb-21 10:45
protectorNelek16-Feb-21 10:45 
GeneralRe: Do programmers have a life? Because I feel like I don't have a life anymore Pin
User 1493685317-Feb-21 9:24
User 1493685317-Feb-21 9:24 
GeneralRe: Do programmers have a life? Because I feel like I don't have a life anymore Pin
  Forogar  16-Feb-21 2:40
professional  Forogar  16-Feb-21 2:40 
GeneralRe: Do programmers have a life? Because I feel like I don't have a life anymore Pin
User 1493685316-Feb-21 9:02
User 1493685316-Feb-21 9:02 
GeneralRe: Do programmers have a life? Because I feel like I don't have a life anymore Pin
Nelek16-Feb-21 10:51
protectorNelek16-Feb-21 10:51 
GeneralRe: Do programmers have a life? Because I feel like I don't have a life anymore Pin
  Forogar  17-Feb-21 2:07
professional  Forogar  17-Feb-21 2:07 
GeneralRe: Do programmers have a life? Because I feel like I don't have a life anymore Pin
User 1493685317-Feb-21 9:23
User 1493685317-Feb-21 9:23 
GeneralRe: Do programmers have a life? Because I feel like I don't have a life anymore Pin
W Balboos, GHB16-Feb-21 2:43
W Balboos, GHB16-Feb-21 2:43 
GeneralRe: Do programmers have a life? Because I feel like I don't have a life anymore Pin
User 1493685316-Feb-21 9:05
User 1493685316-Feb-21 9:05 
GeneralRe: Do programmers have a life? Because I feel like I don't have a life anymore Pin
dandy7216-Feb-21 11:46
dandy7216-Feb-21 11:46 
GeneralRe: Do programmers have a life? Because I feel like I don't have a life anymore Pin
User 1493685317-Feb-21 9:15
User 1493685317-Feb-21 9:15 
GeneralRe: Do programmers have a life? Because I feel like I don't have a life anymore Pin
Gerry Schmitz16-Feb-21 11:58
mveGerry Schmitz16-Feb-21 11:58 
GeneralRe: Do programmers have a life? Because I feel like I don't have a life anymore Pin
User 1493685317-Feb-21 9:13
User 1493685317-Feb-21 9:13 
GeneralRe: Do programmers have a life? Because I feel like I don't have a life anymore Pin
charlieg16-Feb-21 12:26
charlieg16-Feb-21 12:26 

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